Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that hopes the winner of The Royal Rumble will headline Wrestlemania! ECW’s November To Remember 2000 headlined by a Double Jeopardy Match, what the fuck is that you ask? Beats me, we also have Chris Chetti vs Nova, the tag team that had a tonne of potential but never had the chance to win the titles, RVD is gone so we have New Jack vs Rhino and Da Baldies taking on Chilly Willy & Balls Mahoney. We are going down to our last legs now with the company, the starpower which was pretty diminished to begin with is dwindling down ever further. Let’s see how it goes for ECW!
Simon Diamond & Johnny Swinger vs Joey Matthews & Christian York
Diamond attacks Gertner, Styles attacks Diamond. Swinger has a chair, Gertner is left alone in the ring. Dreamer makes the save, what is going on. CW Anderson lays out Dreamer, York & Matthews come out and make the save. Could we not just have a match? Double suicide dives by York & Matthews, assisted suplex and senton combination. Double Russian legsweep to Diamond, hotshot by Swinger and a clothesline by Diamond. Matthews meets the guard rail, Simon suplexes for two. Where is the commentary? What is taking Styles so long? It sounds so odd! Double STO on Matthews, neckbreaker by Matthews out of desperation. Diamond attacks York, low blow by Matthews and a tag to York.
Springboard elbow, sit-out facebuster with Diamond saving Swinger. Matthews and Swinger brawl on the floor, Diamond and Swinger nails a sidewalk slam and reverse DDT on a chair. Two for Swinger, Swinger is sent into Diamond’s jewels. Hurricanrana by Matthews, Anderson interferes and Spinebusters Matthews. Problem Solver on York and this match is over.
Fine opening match, no real story to the match. The young tag team put over another team, Diamond and Swinger are nowhere near as interesting as Doring & Roadkill but it worked for the match. Just wish they would cut out all run-ins and such, we could have a normal match without the need for all the bells and whistles.
Winners: Diamond & Swinger over Matthews & York via Problem Solver!
Kid Kash vs CW Anderson
Kash saves the young tag team, dive onto everyone, Anderson is thrown in the ring and we have a match. They trade control before a slingshot hurricanrana by Kash, crowd brawling. Chair to the head, two for Kash. Springboard is countered for the Ferris Wheel, chop by Anderson. Single Arm DDT by Anderson, Kash is tossed to the floor. Kash is sent into the ringpost arm first, chair to the arm of Kash. Kash’s arm is worked over, corkscrew attack for two. Massive left from Anderson for two, single arm TKO for two. Springboard sunset flip for two, double knockdown in the middle of the ring. The two smack one another on the ground, Kash wins the war. Springboard hurricanrana for two, delayed superplex for two.
Series of pins by both men, Kash misses a springboard and eats a massive Spinebuster for two. Anderson is not happy, Kash ducks a punch. Money Maker does not connect, spinning DDT and that is all she wrote, Anderson does not kick out.
Well, they wrestled but I felt I saw nothing of any note or importance, there is nowhere for Kash to really go except for the TV Championship. Whether it would happen or not, I am not sure but Anderson went from challenging for the number one contendership to nothing on this pay per view. It is disappointing but what should I expect from ECW at this point, they are losing stars every second so it is a miracle that they are even putting together shows.
Winner: Kid Kash over CW Anderson via DDT!
Danny Doring & Roadkill/Spike Dudley vs Hot Commodity W/ Elektra
Why Doring and Roadkill are not competing for the tag team titles I will never understand, these guys have been the most popular tag team for months in ECW. Hot Commodity use their three on two advantage to rough up Doring & Roadkill, Spike Dudley is here to aid Doring & Roadkill. Lots of diving to the floor, Hamrick is caught by Roadkill. Slam, slingshot elbow. Powerslam to Money, Elbow Drop to Money. Lancaster Lariat of Lust to Dinero, Doring is distracted by Money and Hot Commodity take control. Quick tags between Dinero and Money, Huge Leg Drop by Hamrick for two. Right hands by Hamrick, G-Spot Suite by Doring.
Tag to Roadkill, clotheslines for everyone. Barn Burner, eye poke to Dinero. Dirt Road Slam, Hamrick whacks Roadkill with a chair. Spike raises hell before a chop block, Hamrick misses his leg drop. Dinero misses a diving clothesline, Acid Drop is blocked for a powerbomb. Roadkill nails his springboard clothesline, Elektra is in the ring. Bare-Back, Acid Drop to Hamrick for the win.
Another quick match which had plenty of fun spots, enough to make the match entertaining. Doring & Roadkill need the tag team belts, they are the premier team and they are being wasted every day that they do not hold those belts. Nice to see Spike in the ring, Spike is a bumping machine and it’s nice with The Dudleys being gone that we get to see Spike mix it up with other wrestlers.
Winners: Team Spike over Hot Commodity via Acid Drop!
(Loser Leaves Town Match) Chris Chetti W/ Lou E. Dangerously vs Nova
They split up, if they had more profile and meaningful matches, this would mean a lot more. Nova runs at Chetti, clotheslines and kicks. Nova misses a plancha, Chetti chops Nova. Off the guard rail, Nova goes. Chetti misses a spear, Nova has a chair. Chetti is bleeding, crucifix by Nova for two. They dodge one another’s finishes, chickenwing by Nova. Lou E. grabs Nova’s foot, thrustkick by Chetti. Chetti is whipped into a chair, stomps by Nova. Chetti is down, low blow by Lou E. Scissors Kick, right hands by Chetti.
Corner clothesline and sidekick for two, delayed suplex for two. Backslide from Nova, two for Nova. Eye poke by Chetti, Novacaine for two. Sidekick by Nova, Nova pummels Chetti. Chetti cracks Nova with a chair, Nova shakes it off and screams, pummelling Chetti. Enzuigiri, Lou E places Chetti’s boot on the bottom rope. Baseball slide to Lou E, Third Degree from Nova. Lou E cracks Nova with a cellphone, Nova kicks out at two. Nova and Chetti brawl on the top rope, Nova catches Chetti for a Super Kryptonite Krunch for the win.
I did not feel the desperation of the match, I did not buy the two hated one another despite their best efforts, I thought the interference made no difference as I am almost numb to it at this stage, every match has interference of some kind. The finish was fitting of a feud such as this but everything that went in between was not interesting, the ultimate slap to the face is that they cut away not even seeing Chetti’s reaction to leaving ECW.
Winner: Nova over Chris Chetti via Kryptonite Krunch!
(Flaming Tables Match) Balls Mahoney & Chilly Willy vs Da Baldies
This reeks of desperation, chairs to the head by Mahoney. An insane amount of crowd brawling and brawling by the stage, some chairs are thrown. Boots to the head of Mahoney, a table has been brought into the ring. Mahoney DDTs Angel, Devito dropkicks Mahoney. Mahoney nails a Super Nutcracker Suite, too bad I have seen a finisher off the top rope already. Nutcracker Suite on Angel, Devito is thrown to the floor. Table is lit on fire and Angel eats a powerbomb through the table. Garbage match, no wrestling DUD!
Winners: Balls Mahoney & Chilly Willy over Da Baldies via Powerbomb Through A Table!
(ECW World Television Championship Match) New Jack vs Rhino ©
Weapons, weapons and more weapons. Lots of weapon shots for New Jack, Rhino shakes it all off. Table is in the corner, Rhino uses the referee as a shield to avoid a trash can to the head. New Jack has a staple gun, crooked referee from before gets stapled. New Jack has a guitar, Rhino no-sells the guitar. Gore through the table, cover and Rhino wins. Trash, back to back trash is awful. DUD!
(ECW World Tag Team Championship Match) The Unholy Alliance vs The FBI © W/ Big Sal
Rematch from last month, Whipwreck and Mamaluke begin the match. Hammerlock from Whipwreck, hammerlock from Mamaluke. Wristlock from Whipwreck, victory rolls by both men. Sidewalk slams by Whipwreck to both FBI members, tag to Tajiri. Double spinebuster and gutbuster followed by a dropkick. Guido is tagged, shoving between the two. Test of strength, Tajiri snapmares Guido. Escapes and counters from both, firemen’s carry by Tajiri. Pin by Tajiri for two, stand-off. Kick by Tajiri, tag to Whipwreck. Slingshot leg drop, Guido is sandwiched between two chairs and gets kicked in the head. Mamaluke is smacked onto the guard rail, Guido onto the announce table. Mamaluke crotches Whipwreck on the top rope, Guido and Mamaluke get caught.
Double Whippersnapper from the top rope, Whipwreck is clutching his shoulder. Big Sal splashes Mamaluke by mistake, Whipwreck is legit injured. The match comes to a stand-still, Whipwreck is stretchered out of the arena. Tajiri is caught in a Sicilian crab, Super Crazy makes his return to ECW and of course, it’s to team with Tajiri. Double dropkick to The FBI, monkey flip for Mamaluke. Ten punches to Guido, pop-up facebuster for Mamaluke. Mamaluke is caught in the tree of woe, low dropkick for Mamaluke. Guido eats a chair to the face, Crazy holds a chair for Tajiri to kick in Guido’s face. Mamaluke and Guido take control of Tajiri, multiple kicks to the arm. Tajiri is isolated, Guido nails The Sicilian Slice for two.
Sidekick by Tajiri, clothesline by an interfering Mamaluke. Handspring Elbow by Tajiri, Crazy comes in for the hot-tag. Low dropkick and powerbomb for Mamaluke, spinning DDT for Guido. Spinning heel kick for Mamaluke, Mamaluke bounces Crazy’s head off the apron. Mamaluke is pressed into the crowd, Big Sal attacks Crazy on the floor. Big Sal and Crazy are in the crowd, Fujiwara armbar by Tajiri. Crazy moonsaults onto Big Sal, Tajiri is left with two FBI members. Tarantula on Mamaluke, Guido kicks Tajiri. Bulldog by Guido, sloppy looking one and the match ends.
Oh no, that was weak. When I say weak, I mean one of the lamest finishes I have seen in recent memory. ECW and its old ways, would have been a nice return for Crazy to win the championships, Crazy and Tajiri both deserve to be champion based on their Herculean efforts in stealing the shows on ECW.
Winners: FBI over Crazy & Tajiri via Bulldog!
(ECW World Heavyweight Championship Double Jeopardy Match) Jerry Lynn © vs Justin Credible/The Sandman vs Steve Corino
Odd match, two single matches take place and the winner of both will face-off for the championship. Sandman is late? So, Lynn and Credible fight. Corino gets involved even though he doesn’t really have to, all three men fight one another. Sandman eventually makes it to the ring, Corino is meant to be a babyface yet is heeling harder than Credible at this moment and time. Lynn is already bleeding, this match has broken down so why not have a four-way dance? Lynn tornado DDTs Corino, Sandman guillotines Corino off the guard rail. Scrapbuster slam by Credible on Lynn, Lynn and Credible fight one another in the ring, Sandman and Corino continue brawling. Sandman has a ladder, Credible meets the ladder via Irish whip. Same fate for Lynn, Lynn and Credible are thrown to the floor.
Corino is suplexed on the ladder for two, Corino is buried under a ladder, slingshot hilo by Sandman for two. Sandman bulldogs Credible on the ladder, Corino is in the ring with chairs and a guard rail. Corino is suplexed onto the guard rail, Lynn tombstones Credible. Francine interferes, Dawn Marie is stopped by Corino. Sandman canes Corino, Lynn eats a double superkick from Credible and Corino. That’s Incredible on Lynn, Old School Expulsion on Sandman, we have a double elimination.
Corino has been acting heelish all night long, Lynn who had been champion for all but a month, Credible is back in the title picture. Who do I even cheer for in this? It seems they were doing their best to make me hate Corino, this makes no sense. Bionic Elbows from Corino for two, Corino is back dropped onto Lynn. Credible is whipped to the floor, White Russian legsweep by Sandman against the guard rail. Corino has a table, both me chop one another. Both men bang heads, Corino northern lights suplexes Credible through the table. Francine is in the ring, Credible pulls Francine into a superkick. Old School Expulsion for two.
Credible measures Corino, Superkick to the face of Corino. Two for Credible, Credible has a cane. Corino is whacked on the back of the head, That’s Incredible is countered for Old School Expulsion. Dawn Marie low blows Victory and Corino, not enough limelight for her. Credible has his cane, whack to the head of Corino. Superkick by Corino out of desperation and we have a new champion.
Garbage match, I am sorry but there is no way around this bizarre clusterfuck of a match. Lynn hands over the belt to Corino like a passing of the torch, CORINO DID NOT EVEN PIN LYNN FOR THE CHAMPIONSHIP. There is no sense in this passing moment, LYNN WAS CHAMPION FOR A MONTH. Am I living in an alternate universe? I am proud of Corino, the guy was arguably one of the most entertaining wrestlers over the year 2000 but this moment was done so poorly. Makes his number one contender’s match with CW Anderson pointless, the crowd wanted RVD or The Sandman.
Winner: Steve Corino over Justin Credible via Superkick!
That was ECW’s November To Remember 2000, their annual big show of the year and if you big show of the year has two garbage matches back to back, you can go jump off a bridge. Like most ECW shows, it starts off fun, no real psychology, story-telling is non-existent but you have a good time. That slump in the middle took me out of it, two matches of nothing but brawling back to back, please never again you are killing me Mr. Heyman. The main event was silly, a four-way dance would have been fine not this double jeopardy nonsense. Corino’s crowning came over the wrong man and in the wrong angle, why pull the trigger at such an awkward time? You need RVD but RVD is not around, you have no real main event scene and the show falls apart. Thanks for reading and remember: There’s always another night!