Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that stirs up more controversy than Vince Russo speaking about the wrestling business! We are back, college takes it toll on all and I am no exception but here we are with WWE’s No Way Out 2007, one month away from Wrestlemania, WWE’s biggest show we have the superstars of Raw, Smackdown and ECW coming together to make this a night to never forget. The main event consists of champions and challengers teaming up for a special attraction match as John Cena and Shawn Michaels do battle with Batista and The Undertaker, Bobby Lashley defends his ECW Championships against the brash Mr. Kennedy and much, much more. So, can WWE knock this one out of the park on the road to Wrestlemania? Let’s find out!
It is all about the big four as Vince Mcmahon announced that Michaels & Cena would team up against Batista & Undertaker, the biggest tag match in WWE history. Rather tame package in comparison to so many others that would normally fill the slot, no hype for any other match so it might give you an idea of what we are dealing with for this pay per view.
MVP & MNM W/ Melina vs Chris Benoit & The Hardy Boyz
God damn it! Have I not suffered enough when it comes to MNM and The Hardys? This is absolutely ridiculous, these two have been battling for months. This is stretching it to the max, Mercury and Matt begin the match. Right hands by both, Matt eats a knee from Mercury. Elbow to the head, hard Irish whip before Matt blocks with a boot. Middle rope elbow to the back of the head and a tag to Jeff, slingshot dropkick for two. Quick tag to Matt, Mercury pulls Matt down by the hair. In comes Nitro, Nitro eats a hiptoss. Right hands by Matt, Nitro pushes Matt to the corner, tag to MVP. Right hands and a scoop slam by MVP, Matt dodges an elbow.
Tag to Benoit, right hands and chops. Knees, eye rake by MVP to take control. Snapmare and kick to the spine for two, slap by Benoit. MVP tags Mercury but Mercury will not get in the ring. Clothesline by Benoit, snap suplex for two. Tag to Jeff, eye rake by MVP. Nitro jumps in and beats down Jeff, reverse mule kick and neckbreaker by Jeff. Legdrop to the low regions, slap by Nitro. Mercury sends Jeff into the barricade after a distraction from Nitro, reverse chinlock by Nitro. Jeff fights out but Mercury knees Jeff as Jeff tried to run off the ropes, Mercury is now the legal man. Reverse chinlock by Mercury, MVP is now in the ring. MNM put the boots to Jeff while MVP distracts the referee, snap suplex for two. Tag to Nitro, hard Irish whip by Nitro. Jeff is placed on the top rope, Jeff knocks off Nitro. Beautiful Whisper in The Wind, Jeff tags Matt.
Right hands and elbow by Matt, clothesline by Mercury. Clothesline and bulldog combination, Side Effect on Nitro for two. MVP stops Matt’s twist of fate, back suplex by MVP. Tag to MVP, reverse chinlock by MVP. Gutwrench suplex by MVP, Ballin’ Elbow for two. Tag to Mercury, right hands by Mercury. Clothesline by Mercury for two, tag to Nitro who works the ribs. Neckbreaker for two, Matt back drops Nitro but Mercury stops the tag. Same fate for Mercury, tag to Benoit.
Snap suplexes and chops all around, double German suplex to MNM. Crowd goes crazy, The Hardys clear the ring. Poetry in Motion on Mercury, Twist of Fate and Jeff lands The Swanton Bomb. Benoit climbs too, Diving Headbutt to Mercury and MVP makes the save. MVP and Matt are on the floor, Nitro clotheslines Jeff on the apron. MVP has Benoit’s championship, Crippler Crossface by Benoit but Nitro makes the save. Benoit eats a clothesline, Matt stops the snapshot and Benoit rolls through on Mercury for a Crippler Crossface, this match is over!
Solid stuff, I am sick to death seeing MNM vs The Hardys but no denying that the fans just eat up everything about The Hardys, Jeff is and clearly always was the bigger star of the two but as a package deal, The Hardys are fantastic. It was a laid back style match with a few nice little spots thrown in, not enough to be memorable but enough to be a good match to open the show.
Winners: Chris Benoit/The Hardys over MNM & MVP via Crippler Crossface!
(WWE Cruiserweight Championship Match) Gregory Helms © vs Scotty Too Hotty vs Daivari vs Funaki vs Jimmy Wang Yang vs Shannon Moore vs Jamie Noble vs Chavo Guerrero
Two men start and more enter after eliminations until we have one man left standing. Daivari jumps on Scotty Too Hotty, right hands, hard Irish whips and a scoop slam for two. Daivari taunts, right hands from Scotty. Facebuster by Scotty, Scotty nails The Worm and eliminates Daivari.
In comes Gregory Helms, Scotty is beaten down with stomps and chokes. Rope hung guillotine for two, double underhook from Helms. Scotty gets to his feet and smacks Helms before a back suplex from Scotty. Helms stops a worm attempt, Double Knee Facebuster and Scotty is eliminated.
Funaki comes down to the ring, Irish whip to the corner. Funaki blocks with a right hand, Funaki nails a crossbody but Helms holds onto the tights and manages to eliminate Smackdown’s number one announcer.
Shannon Moore is next, Prince of Punk. Nice headscissors on the floor, backbreaker in the ring by Helms for two. Middle rope neckbreaker by Moore for two, Moore wants to impress. Helms nails Moore with an exploder suplex from the middle rope and a Double Knee Facebuster ends Moore’s night.
Jimmy Wang Yang is here, elbow and standing moonsault for two, right hands by Yang. Eye poke by Yang, foot sweep and an Oklahoma roll for two. Russian legsweep into an octopus like stretch, transition into a pin for two. Helms dodges the moonsault from Yang, massive right from Helms. Helms measures, Yang blocks the facebuster for a hurricanrana. Helms is eliminated but nails an Eye of The Hurricane.
Noble sprints down to the ring, two for Noble. Neckbreaker by Noble for two, Noble is pouncing on Yang. Scoop slam by Noble, leg drop and a seated cobra clutch. Noble tries a roll up with the tights for another two, sleeper from Noble. Jawbreaker reversal by Yang, Noble misses a high knee. Inverted atomic drop and clotheslines by Yang, spinning heel kick for two. Flying knee by Noble for two, Noble attempts a superplex. Yang counters and delivers his Standing Moonsault for the elimination.
Yang believes that the match is over but Vickie Guerrero has pulled a surprise by having Chavo enter the match. Chavo is back to take out Yang, Yang is exhausted. Back suplex and a kick to the spine, stomps to the chest and a foot choke in the corner. Yang nails a spinning heel kick, Yang elevates Chavo to the floor. Body Splash to the floor by Yang, Chavo dodges a missile dropkick. Three Amigos by Chavo, Chavo is on the top rope. Yang blocks for a tope rope hurricanrana for two, Chavo prevents a moonsault. Yang attempts a corkscrew moonsault, Chavo dodges and nails The Frog Splash and we have a new champion.
Match was nothing special, entries were rapid and meant nothing, Helms’ reign should have meant the start of something new for the division with a great babyface overcoming the seemingly unbeatable Helms. Chavo was not that much of a heat magnet as the great heel turn was wasted by this point, Chavo had so much momentum in his feud with Mysterio but the matches did not deliver but Chavo took out Mysterio. However, Chavo was then fed to Benoit so I do not feel anything from this championship change.
Winner: Chavo Guerrero over Jimmy Wang Yang via Frog Splash!
Finlay & Hornswoggle vs Boogeyman & Little Boogeyman
No idea why this is happening but here we go, Finlay and Boogeyman begin the match. Wristlock by Finlay, firemen’s carry by Boogeyman. Irish whip and right hands by Boogeyman, Boogeyman smacks Finlay off the barricade. Big slap across the apron by Boogeyman, kick to the head by Boogeyman. Powerslam, Little Boogeyman is in the ring. Two big hip attacks before Little Boogeyman eats some worms. Hornswoggle wants Little Boogeyan before Finlay boots Little Boogeyman. Small package by Little Boogeyman, Finlay kicks out and mauls Little Boogeyman. Elbow by Finlay, massive hip attack by Finlay. Short-arm scissors, Little Boogeyman and Hornswoggle fight under the ring. Boogeyman crawls out from under the ring, shoulder tackle and clotheslines by Boogeyman.
Leg trip by Boogeyman, catapult to the corner. Irish whip and corner elbow by Boogeyman, corner splash by Boogeyman. Clothesline by Boogeyman, Little Boogeyman dives onto Finlay but here comes Hornswoggle. Boogeyman has worms, Hornswoggle is being chased by Boogeyman. Little Boogeyman eats a shillelagh to the head and we have winners in Finlay & Hornswoggle.
Yeah, that was pretty piss-poor in terms of comedy. That’s all it had going for it and it did not deliver nearly enough of that to keep the fans amused or myself. The two never even locked up, we never saw Hornswoggle and Little Boogeyman get it on inside of the ring. That was the whole novelty of this match and you did not give it to us for that match. DUD!
Winners: Finlay & Hornswoggle over Boogeyman & Little Boogeyman via Shillelagh!
King Booker W/ Queen Sharmell vs Kane
Kane eliminated Booker from the rumble, Booker came back and eliminated Kane. Simple idea and here we have the match, Kane corners Booker. Right hands and uppercuts by Kane, corner elbows. Booker catches Kane with a kick to the ribs, elbows and chops by Booker. Kane overpowers Booker, more rights to the head of Booker. Kane eats a corner elbow from Booker but Kane answers back with a backbreaker, Booker rolls to the apron. Hotshot by Booker, Kane looks for a chokeslam but Booker knees Kane. Kane reverses an Irish whip for a boot, clothesline to the floor by Kane. Booker plays possum before bouncing Kane off the steel steps, missile dropkick for two.
Top wristlock by Booker, Kane shakes off Booker. Right hands by Kane, big boot and Kane is climbing the top rope. Booker counters the diving clothesline for a heel kick, two for Booker. Kane mounts a comeback before a flying forearm from Booker for two, mounted punches by Booker. Right hands and kicks by Booker, Booker wants a suplex but Kane nails his own suplex. Massive heel kick by Booker, two for Booker. Kane is up, Booker dodges a chokeslam. Kane avoids a scissors kick, clothesline by Kane.
Kane sits up! Booker is unaware. Right hands by The Big Red Machine, Booker is bounced off the turnbuckle. Ten punches by Kane, corner clothesline by Kane. Make it two, sidewalk slam. Diving clothesline by Kane, Sharmell is on the apron. Harlem sidekick by Booker, Scissors Kick is blocked for a Chokeslam and this match is over.
For two big stars like these two, it sure seemed like they wanted to have a match that would be on par with a house show main event. There was nothing special about this match, only thing that makes it any sort of fun is the character work of Sharmell and Booker, Booker was so funny being goofy thinking he could lift Kane among other things but this was quite the poor match.
Winner: Kane over King Booker via Chokeslam!
(WWE Tag Team Championship Match) Paul London & Brian Kendrick © vs Deuce & Domino W/ Cherry
Love fresh blood, the challengers had beaten the champions twice so we have this tag team championship match. London and Domino start, slapfest before London quickens the pace, spinning reverse elbow. Tag to Kendrick, double Japanese armdrag. Armdrag by Kendrick, tag to London. Double stomp to the arm, Deuce is sent crashing to the floor. Dropkick to Domino, London and Kendrick try to fire up the crowd, it does not work. London drop toeholds Domino, blind tag by Deuce. Domino clubs down London, backbreaker by Deuce. Short-arm clothesline for two, Deuce grabs a hold. Knees to the back by Deuce, tag to Domino.
Clubbing blows to the back, surfboard stretch by Domino. Domino pulls London to the corner, tag to Deuce. Deuce slams London back first into the corner, tag to Domino. Knee to the back, Deuce tags back into the match and applies a chinlock to London with a knee to the back. Deuce knocks London off the apron, London kicks off Deuce and dodges both challengers.
Tag to Kendrick, forearms to Domino. Massive dropkick, backslide on Deuce for two. Kicks to the legs, massive right by Deuce. The challengers attempt a doomsday device, Kendrick rolls through and victory rolls Deuce for the win, London and Kendrick are still champions.
The meh card continues as we have another match that felt like it was just kind of there, granted that the challengers were brand new to WWE TV. However, you need to hit a home-run when it comes to pay per view and they did not on this occasion, the fractured tag team scene in the WWE continues to struggle along.
Winners: London & Kendrick over Deuce & Domino via Roll-Up!
(ECW Heavyweight Championship Match) Bobby Lashley © vs Mr. Kennedy
This match starts on the ramp, not the best match for Kennedy when it comes to his push while the Lashley train is in full effect. Lashley takes Kennedy to the ring and throws around the challenger, Kennedy is on the apron. Kennedy rolls out to the floor, Kennedy momentarily has control before Lashley throws Kennedy into the ring. Eye poke by Kennedy, back drop by Lashley. Shoulder block by Lashley, scoop slam by Lashley. Clothesline by Lashley, Kennedy is caught for a stalling delayed vertical suplex. More low root tactics by Kennedy pay off, stomps in the corner by Kennedy before another clothesline by Lashley.
Torture rack by Lashley, Kennedy rakes the eyes and dropkicks the knee, running low boot by Kennedy. Indian deathlock by the challenger, Lashley kicks off Kennedy but Kennedy goes after the injured leg. Single leg Boston crab by Kennedy, Lashley battles back but a scoop slam attempt fails as Kennedy chop blocks the leg. Kennedy dropkicks the leg and rakes the face of Lashley, stomps and a foot choke from Kennedy. Lashley shoves off Kennedy, Kennedy goes for the leg and nails a DDT for two.
Rolling firemen’s carry by Kennedy, Kennedy is climbing to the top rope. Kenton Bomb is blocked with knees by Lashley, belly to belly suplex by Lashley. Slugfest, exploder suplex by Lashley. Back drop for two, torture rack by Lashley. Backbreaker from torture rack for two, the referee is down. Low blow by Kennedy, Kennedy rolls out to grab a chair. Chair to the back, Lashley blocks the second shot before nailing Kennedy in the back and we have a DQ finish.
What a garbage match, I almost fell asleep during this snorefest. Kennedy was nowhere near as good as they needed him to be to carry Lashley to a watchable match, this was way too long. The leg work meant nothing, Lashley forgot about it as we neared the end of the match. It had a finish that was beyond boring, another win for Kennedy over a big star by DQ. It’s such terrible booking when it comes to making the guy the next big star.
Winner: Mr. Kennedy over Bobby Lashley via DQ!
John Cena & Shawn Michaels vs The Undertaker & Batista
There was a talent contest before that featuring the divas, you missed nothing. So, we have no way of really selling this pay per view beyond this match, both partners on both teams hate one another so it will be a battle of who will crack first and screw up everything for their team. Michaels and Cena have a better advantage as they are tag team champions, Cena and Batista begin the match. Thought they would save that, they are not saving that. Shoulder block and shoulder thrusts in the corner by Batista, boot by Cena. Right hands by Cena, Batista nails a rolling firemen’s carry, Batista nails a jackhammer for two.
Cena fires back before tagging Michaels, chops by HBK. Batista Irish whips Michaels to the corner, kick by Michaels but massive clothesline by Batista for two. Tag to Taker, rights and lefts to Michaels, Taker wrenches the arm. Old School by Taker, Michaels elbows away Taker. HBK tries ten punches but Taker says screw that, boot to the head for two. Batista and Cena are in for round two, right hands by Cena. Elbow By Batista, tag to Taker. Running knee by Taker, Taker is on the top rope. Cena does not nail a superplex on first attempt but does on the second. Taker scores with a clothesline, elbow drop misses as Cena tags in Michaels.
Flying forearm by HBK, Taker grabs Michaels by the throat. Chops by Michaels, Michaels runs into a military press slam. Michaels is pressed to the floor, Batista drops Michaels on the steel steps. Batista and Taker exchange quick tags pummelling HBK, chops from HBK who wants the comeback. Sidewalk slam by Taker for two, Batista is now the legal man. Nice rear-naked choke from Batista, Michaels manages to nail a big DDT to slow down The Animal. Tag to Cena, clotheslines to Batista. Throwback, Cena goes to the top rope. Kobashi style leg drop, Taker comes in immediately to stop that pin. Shoulder block for Taker, Taker is clotheslined to the floor.
Spinning side slam to Batista, Five Knuckle Shuffle but Taker stops The FU. Michaels and Taker brawl on the floor, Michaels dives into Taker’s arm. Michaels is sent crashing against the ringpost, Batista slams Cena. Michaels stops a Batista bomb with a chop block, Michaels roughs up Batista. Clothesline by Michaels, tag to Cena. Elbow by Cena for two, Irish whip to the corner. Cena waffles Batista for two, chops by HBK who comes in after Cena. Enzuigiri for two, front chancery by HBK. Cena receives the tag, Batista fights back before a sleeper from Cena. Cena applies The STFU on Batista, Taker saves the match with a boot to the head of Cena.
Scoop slam by Cena, tag to Michaels. Michaels climbs high, elbow drop connects to the heart of Batista. Batista ducks sweet chin music for a sidewalk slam, Taker gets the hot-tag. Right hands to everyone, corner clothesline, snake eyes followed by a big boot. Leaping clothesline by Taker, corner clotheslines from The Deadman. Double chokeslam, no Batista spinebusters Michaels. Chokeslam for Cena, Batista spinebusters Taker. Sweet Chin Music and an FU leads to a win for the Raw duo.
Well, fair play to JBL for calling that match by himself as Michael Cole’s voice finally died after being shaky all night. We finally had a match worthy of the main event and worthy of pay per view on this show, they needed it so bad and boy, they delivered when given the chance. It was like molten hot reactions for Taker’s hot-tag at the end, the crowd were in a frenzy for this match by that point, the big struggles, the matches we thought we would never see, it was perfect in so many ways when you think of it all, great stuff all around from JBL’s one man performance to everyone inside of the ring, a nice little underrated gem and a sign of things to come at next month’s Wrestlemania.
Winners: John Cena & Shawn Michaels over Batista & Undertaker via FU!
That was WWE’s No Way Out of 2007, a very good definition of what a B level pay per view if you asked a very jaded wrestling fan. The pay per view opened with a quite fun six-man tag and went to shit following that match. When I say went to shit, I do not mean in terms of things going wrong or questionable booking but plain and simple: super, boring and uninteresting matches coupled with uninspired performances from the men in those matches. It is the truth, this was built around one match, the main event and that did deliver, no denying how good that was for a main event but everything else bar the opening match was boring. It was just there, it did nothing to progress anything of real significance. My advice is watch the main event and nothing else from this show, thanks for reading and remember: There’s always another night!
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