Hello and welcome to another
rebel-rousing edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling
review series on the internet that wants to beat up Corey Graves more than
Booker T! ECW’s Heatwave 1999 headlined by The Impact Players taking on Rob Van
Dam & Jerry Lynn, that’s disappointing. What about Sabu? Why not have Sabu
& RVD take on The Impact Players? We also have Taz vs Tajiri, once again
Taz faces a rising star in the promotion who fans will believe does not have a
chance of winning the championship. It is really not a good look for Taz, the
rest of the card seems decent so we will see what comes my way!
Danny Doring & Roadkill W/ Angelica vs Chris Chetti &
Nova
Lita has
one fat ass let me tell you that! Nova and Chetti are ECW’s odd couple, Chetti
loves himself while Nova wants to whoop all kinds of ass. Nova attacks Doring
and Roadkill why Chetti is in love with himself, Doring attacks Chetti. Hart
Attack by Doring & Roadkill, Irish whip to the corner. Corner splash by
Roadkill, Bareback by Doring for two. Nova fires back at Doring, G Spot Suite
by Doring. Tag to Roadkill, springboard leg drop by Roadkill for two. Sidewalk
slam, springboard elbow by legal man Doring. Beautiful Spin Doctor from Nova,
Chetti gets the tag. Clotheslines, scissors kick to Roadkill. Powerslam to
Doring for two, Nova stunners and DDTs Roadkill & Doring.
Nova and Chetti combine for a monkey flip into a clothesline,
figure four by Nova. Doring & Chetti leg drop both figure four wrestlers,
blue thunder bomb by Chetti, Double Springboard Moonsault by Chetti. Chetti is
on the mic, Chetti begins talking trash. Chetti dances, Angelica comes into the
ring. Nova is in Chetti’s face, Angelica slaps Chetti. Chetti nails The
Amityville Horror. Nova drops Doring with The Kryptonite Krunch, Amityville
Horror on Roadkill and Tidal Wave for the win.
Unbelievably fun match from these four young wrestlers,
Chetti and Nova gelled inside of the ring while Roadkill was a crazy, athletic
big man who was doing all sorts of dives, the crowd was hot into this match.
Not all was bad it seemed for ECW when a lot of their bigger stars were
leaving, these four could rip it up inside of the ring given the spotlight.
That was one of the best opening matches that they had on ECW pay per view.
Winners:
Chris Chetti & Nova over Doring & Roadkill via Tidal Wave!
Jason vs Jazz
Jazz was in Credible’s entourage, not saying much before
Jason annoyed Jazz for the last time. Jazz is here to kick all sorts of ass,
think of ECW’s version of Chyna but even better in the ring when given the
chance. Slap from Jazz, clothesline has no effect. Crossbody as Jason slaps
Jazz’s ass and nails a falling slam, drop toehold by Jazz. Scoop slam by Jazz,
middle rope crossbody for two. Legsweep by Jazz, chop by Jason. Jason misses a leg
drop, necksnap and cradle by Jazz for two.
Lock-up, knees and chops by Jason. Dropkick by Jason, middle
rope elbow for two. Dropkick to the back by Jason, crucifix pin by Jazz for
two. Jason sweeps the legs for two, chop and elbow for two. Leg drop for two,
kicks by Jazz but Jason absorbs the punishment. Suplex by Jazz, Samoan drop by
Jazz for two. Headbutt to the groin, Jazz has a chair. Make it two, Jazz smacks
a chair into Jason’s nuts, enzuigiri from Jason. Jason tries for a powerbomb,
Jazz nails The Jazz Stinger on the chair for the win.
Fun match from these two, the crowd seemed so into this
match, I was rather shocked but Jason was a little dickhead and it’s been a
while since we have seen Jason be brutalized while Jazz could go inside of that
ring, Heyman would use Jazz very well from this point.
Winner:
Jazz over Jason via Jazz Stinger!
Super Crazy vs Little Guido W/ Big Sal E Graziano
ECW is making the most of Super Crazy and Guido, two very good
wrestlers who really impressed at the last pay per view, Guido brought a lot out
of Tajiri, a side we had not really seen before while Super Crazy had a great
match with Taka Michinoku. Lock-up by Guido, clean break from Guido. Guido
pulls Super Crazy down by the hair, leg sweeps all around by the two. Arm drags
a plenty, stand-off. Guido lures in Super Crazy, Fujiwara armbar off a springboard
attempt from Super Crazy. Springboard moonsault by Super Crazy after a legsweep
for two, Guido nails a swinging neckbreaker for two. Chest slap, Irish whip to
the corner by Super Crazy, lariat in the corner. Ten punches, stomps by Super
Crazy.
Elbow by Guido, ten punches by Guido does not work.
Powerbomb, standing moonsault for two. Big Sal grabs Super Crazy’s leg, Guido
is sent flying to the floor, Guido could not take control. Crowd brawling time,
moonsault from the bleachers, nice spot. Super Crazy has Guido for a moonsault
in the ring, Big Sal interferes, neckbreaker by Guido. Super Crazy fires back
with a headscissors and a springboard spinning heel kick. Guido blocks a
springboard splash, Sicilian Slice for two. Big Sal attacks Super Crazy as
Guido distracts the referee, splash against the guard rail, slam on the floor.
Sicilian Crab but Super Crazy reaches the ropes.
Irish whip to the
corner, big powerbomb by Guido for two. Guido has the referee again, Big Sal
nails Super Crazy with a rocker dropper, middle rope splash by Guido for two.
Guido blocks a headscissors, kimura lock from Guido. Swinging DDT from Super
Crazy for two, Guido dodges the springboard moonsault. Chest slap from Super
Crazy, Michinoku Driver. Three Turnbuckles Moonsaults from Super Crazy before
diving onto Big Sal, Guido dodges the moonsault. Tomikaze for two, Guido blocks
the powerbomb the first time. Cross-armed Powerbomb for the win by Super Crazy.
Very good match, these two have their styles and they mesh so
well with one another inside of that ring, Guido may be one of the best workers
in the company at that time, Tajiri and now Super Crazy have come out looking
better than when they walked into the match. A flatish finish though, I do not
know what it is about ECW but when it comes to finish, they seem to just happen
and it’s like oh that’s it? Cool, I guess. But this match was so much fun, I
want to see more of these guys mixing it up and luckily, I will get my wish.
Winner:
Super Crazy over Little Guido via Powerbomb!
(ECW Tag Team Championship Match) The Dudley Boyz © W/ Dudley
Entourage vs Balls Mahoney & Spike Dudley
This match again? Guess it is all we have in terms of
seasoned tag teams, Bubba throws Spike onto the ramp in a horrible bump. Balls
pummels Bubba, Bubba ducks the chair shot. Balls is cracked with the chair,
Spike dodges the chair. Dudley Dog using the top rope, Bubba eats the ramp.
Balls is sent into the guard rail, Spike is back dropped into the ring. Sign
Guy puts in the ringbell, ringbell to the throat of Spike. Bubba claws at Balls’
eyes, spinning reverse elbow by D-Von. Balls is messing up Bubba, Bubba tips
into the crowd. Spike tries for a hurricanrana, Spike is successful as D-Von
spills to the floor. Bubba and Balls are in the ring, Spike cutters D-Von on
the guard rail. Bubba has a Dudley Street sign, Spike is cracked with the sign.
Cheesegrater, that’s pretty sick. Balls recovers for a superkick,
cheesegrater to the head of Bubba. Spike and D-Von are crowd brawling, they all
go crowd brawling before Spike dives off the bleachers onto everyone. Balls and
D-Von are in the ring, D-Von pounds away on Balls. Superkick by Balls, Bubba
scoop slams Spike before being punched in the nuts. Ten punches by the
challengers, the champions nail double powerbombs. Spike and Balls are in a bad
way, double neckbreaker by the challengers for two. Sit-out spinebuster and
Acid Drop for double two counts, low blows by the challengers. Acid Drop/Nutcracker
Suite, Sign Guy pulls out the referee. Balls smacks Gertner and Sign Guy’s
heads together. 3D is blocked for double roll-ups, the challengers win.
See what I mean by flat finishes? This should have been huge,
The Dudleys put over the next big tag team as WWF is calling for The Dudley
Boyz. A simple finish to do but they somehow made it seem flat and boring, it
was brawling for the most part so there was nothing that they could do that was
going to blow me away, I have seen the same type of match since The Dudleys
became thee team to beat in ECW. New Jack makes the save and I believe that is
the last we see of The Dudleys in ECW on pay per view. They were great heels,
they had beaten every major team in the company and they earned it, you could
see them as a legitimate act in WWF, they had that big team feel about them and
they proved it becoming the most decorated tag team in wrestling history.
Winners:
Balls Mahoney & Spike Dudley over The Dudley Boyz via Roll-Ups!
(ECW World Heavyweight Championship Match) Taz © vs Tajiri W/
Corino/Victory/Rhino
Corino shits all over Dreamer and Francine, Francine beats Corino
in a match. Tajiri kicks the duo of Francine and Dreamer before Taz comes down
to the ring. Handspring Elbow by Tajiri, baseball slide followed up by an Asai
Moonsault. Taz blocks the tarantula for an Alabama slam, Tajiri lands on his
feet out of a German suplex, low dropkick and Oklahoma Roll for two. Reverse
chinlock by Tajiri, belly to back suplex by Taz. Head and arm Tazplex,
enzuigiri by Tajiri. Tajiri is crotched on the top rope, head and arm Tazplex
from the top rope. Low blow by Tajiri, Buzzsaw Kick and low dropkick by Tajiri
for two.
Tajiri is on the top rope, Taz shoves Tajiri onto Rhino. Taz
has Jack Victory, wheel chair to the face. Thrustkick by Tajiri, hurricanrana
is blocked for a powerbomb by Taz. Tajiri kicks Taz over and over, Taz lures
Tajiri in for a leg trapped Tazplex through the table. Taz goes to the stage,
what is that in Taz’s hands? Barbed wire, Taz has barbed wire. Taz chokes
Tajiri into a Tazmission, disqualification in a championship match in ECW?
Well, that ending sucked two tonnes, they say Tajiri tapped
but it came off more as a DQ, how could we tell when the camera was so far
away? Pointless stuff at the end of the day, Taz continues to have no credible
challengers as the badass and focal point of ECW. Greener pastures in WWF for
Taz await, soon it will be all about how Taz leaves the company. Enjoying Corino’s
work, biggest heel in the company when he opens his mouth, the look also helps
as Corino appears to be about 5 years old compared to the rest of the locker
room.
Winner: Taz
over Tajiri via Tazmission I think?
The Impact Players W/ Dawn Marie vs Rob Van Dam & Jerry
Lynn W/ Bill Alfonso
Lynn and Credible to start, unlikely partners in Lynn &
RVD while The Impact Players are on the same page. Credible shoves Lynn to the
corner, knees to the ribs. Chops, Lynn chops back. Both tease finishers to play
on their past matches, Lynn whips Credible to the corner. Michaels flip and a
bulldog by Lynn, Storm eats a dropkick before Lynn catapults Credible onto
Storm. RVD vs Storm, drop toehold by RVD. Waistlock by RVD, stand-off. Side
headlock, shoulder block by RVD. Monkey flip by RVD after a series of dodges,
Storm kicks RVD. Series of flips, Storm and RVD trade more counters.
Roll through into a Single Leg Boston Crab by Storm, huge
kick counter by RVD. Storm and Lynn are in the ring, chops by Storm. Lynn chops
back, abdominal stretch from Lynn, hotshot by Lynn. Credible waffles Lynn with
the Singapore cane, chops by Credible. Foot choke by Credible, knee to the face
using the chair for extra pain. Sit-out powerbomb for two, eye poke by Credible.
Dropkick by Storm, Lynn fires up. Boot to the face of Storm, victory roll for
two. Series of pins, this spot is overdone with Lynn. Happens every match, low
blow and Superkick by Storm for two. Backbreaker and tag to Credible, Credible
taunts RVD while Storm works over Lynn.
Outsider’s Edge for two, Credible tags Storm. Knee to the
head, Storm wedges a chair on the top rope. Storm tries using the chair for a
crossbody but Lynn dropkicks the chair into Storm’s face. DDT by Lynn on a
chair, Credible is down. Lynn tags RVD, double underhook slam by RVD. Spinning
heel kick, diving thrustkick by RVD. Inverted atomic drop, RVD kicks a chair
into Storm’s face. Baseball slide, corkscrew guillotine leg drop by RVD. Middle
rope bulldog to the ramp by Lynn on Credible. RVD misses a crossbody into the
crowd and wipes out, RVD fights back before nailing Storm with a somersault
splash. Inverted DDT on the ramp by Credible on Lynn.
RVD has Storm on the top rope, Storm pushes RVD onto the
chair, Diving Spinning Heel Kick for two. Low blow by Storm, RVD kicks back at
Storm. Rolling Thunder with the chair on Storm, Credible makes the save. RVD
whips Credible to the floor, RVD drop toeholds Storm onto a chair. Sabu runs
down and smashes Credible through the table, RVD frog splashes Lynn by mistake
as Storm dodges. Van Daminator on Storm, Cradle Piledriver by Lynn and this
match is over.
For a tag match to main event a show, it has to be something special.
This was not that something special, RVD and Lynn never really teased any dissension,
it was much more of Lynn taking an ass-whoopin until RVD’s eventual hot-tag. Credible
and Storm were fine as were Lynn and RVD but there was nothing special about
this main event, you could have done two single matches and it would have been
a better result. I do feel sorry for the company though, they were about to
start on network television and they are losing three of their biggest stars in
Taz and The Dudley Boyz, the next pay per view will be interesting to see what
takes place.
Winners:
RVD & Jerry Lynn over The Impact Players via Cradle Piledriver!
That was ECW’s
Heatwave 1999, another good show from ECW it must be said, ECW pay per views
are becoming far more easier to breeze through, the squash matches are
disappearing in favour of young tag teams and junior heavyweights ripping it up
inside of the ring, that’s all good in my eyes. Something needs to be done for
the heavyweight championship though, feels very weak at the minute as nobody
seems close to touching Taz. The main event was rather boring with nothing of
any significance going on even when RVD splashed Lynn, Lynn just kept going and
won the match. Hate each other my ass, there was no drama to that match while
flat finishes do hurt matches in ECW but this was an overall good show, looking
forward to the next one. Thanks for reading and remember: There’s always
another night!
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