WCW The Great American Bash 1996 Review!

 

Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that gets more heat than Dominik Mysterio! It’s time for WCW’s Great American Bash 1996! Headlined by The Giant defending his WCW World Heavyweight Championship against Lex Luger! Kevin Greene & Steve Mongo McMichaels against Ric Flair & Arn Anderson, we have The Steiner Brothers back on PPV, Rey Mysterio Jr on PPV for the first time and Sting vs Lord Steven Regal! A nice mix of matches here, hard to think we are just one PPV away from history.

 

Fire & Ice vs The Steiner Brothers

Big meaty men slapping meat! You could not get beefier than this contest right here, it is not going to be a good match but there are going to be some beautiful bumps in here. Scott starts with Ice Train, arm-drag from Scott. Shoulder block by Scott before a clothesline by Ice Train, two for Ice Train. Clubbing blows, Scott lands a hip-toss to Ice & Norton, Steinerlines from Rick and Fire & Ice have to regroup on the floor. Norton wants Rick, clubbing blows and elbows by Norton. Norton misses a clothesline but Norton comes back with another clothesline, Rick ducks a clothesline but eats a shoulder block. Chops by Norton,  Rick is whipped to the buckle and explodes out with a Steinerline.

 

Belly to belly suplex by Rick for two, Scott comes in and lands a dropkick. Scott ducks a clothesline but a Samoan drop takes down Scott, in comes Ice Train who lands a big slam. Scott is hurt, clutching his arm. Norton lands a cheap-shot on Scott, Ice Train lands a corner clothesline on Scott. Scott lands a belly to belly suplex, Irish whip and a clothesline. Ice Train lands a shot to the ribs, in comes Norton who is hit with a dirty exploder suplex. Norton rolls to the floor, Scott is on the top rope. Norton catches Scott and delivers a powerslam for two, short-arm clothesline. Ice Train comes in and applies the sleeper, Scott lands elbows and shakes off Ice Train before Ice Train lands a clothesline. Tag to Norton, Argentine back-breaker into a Shoulder-breaker by Norton. Fujiwara arm-bar by Norton, Rick hits Norton in the head over and over but Norton will not let go of the arm.

 

Norton lands a second shoulder-breaker but Rick blind-tagged into the match. Steinerline and a German suplex, powerslam on Ice Train. Everyone is brawling, Ice throws Scott to the floor. Rick is nailed in the back, powerbomb and splash combination with Scott saving Rick from being pinned. Norton clotheslines Scott to the floor. Scott crotches Ice Train on the top rope, Rick plants Norton with a DDT. Ice lands a double axe handle to Rick, Rick no-sells that shit. Steiner Bulldog, Ice Train makes the save. Frankensteiner for the win!

 

Well there were a few botches in there but a lot of feats of amazing strength too, incredible strength on display from the likes of Norton and The Steiners. Few people here could have been paralyzed but those throws and suplexes were awesome. Odd that two babyface tag teams would start the show but WCW is a little crazy like that sometimes. Chemistry wasn’t great but the beefy bumps made up for it for me.

 

Winners: The Steiner Brothers over Fire & Ice via Frankensteiner!

 

(WCW United States Heavyweight Championship Match) Konnan © vs El Gato

Big fan of El Gato and their game capture devices. As for the wrestler, I know nothing of the man but he looks like he is ready to throw down. We also have Konnan who has been very hit and miss and shown heelish tendencies while being here in WCW.

 

Arm-drags by both men, martial arts kicks by El Gato and a dragon screw too. More kicks and arm-drags, Konnan is very confused by El Gato and his insane abilities. Flying arm-drag by Konnan, El Gato is pulled down by the mask and eats a clothesline. Shoulder block by El Gato, leapfrogs by Konnan but El Gato lands a massive heel kick to the face for two. Throat thrust and El Gato has Konnan in a crucifix, Irish whip and El Gato lands a powerbomb for two. El Gato applies a stretch on the mat, Konnan and El Gato trade holds before Konnan powerbombs El Gato onto the floor after a sunset flip. El Gato did not want to take that bump so it is very slow but the fans still react, El Gato tries a corner head-scissors but an Alabama slam into a jacnkife pin and it’s over.

 

I feel for Konnan, his style is different and his opponents are still not sure what to do to get the most out of him so despite his major push, we have no idea where any of this is going or building to. The heel turn could have been very beneficial for Konnan but as it is, it’s very awkward.

 

Winner: Konnan over El Gato via Jacknife Cover!

 

(Lord of The Ring Match) DDP vs Marcus Bagwell

DDP won the battle bowl lethal lottery thing at Slamboree which was filled with the mid-card so not exactly an impressive feat and DDP follows it up by taking on one half of The American Males in Marcus Bagwell who was last seen on PPV in 1994 I imagine with The Patriot. Bagwell sprints down to the ring, DDP sends Bagwell to the floor. Axe handle on the floor, Bagwell is smacked across the chest before Bagwell dumps DDP to the floor snap-mare style. Right hands by Bagwell, DDP is sent into the guard-rail. In the ring, Bagwell lands knee after knee into the arm. Hammerlock, elbow escape and shoulder block by DDP. Flying forearm by Bagwell, Bagwell applies a submission before DDP escapes.

 

Bagwell wants a top rope move but DDP crotches Bagwell, Bagwell is tossed to the mat. DDP lands kick after kick, choke from DDP. DDP rakes at the mouth, DDP lands a Regal Plex for a close two. Bagwell is on his knees and fighting back, abdominal stretch by DDP who uses the ropes for leverage. DDP gets caught and Bagwell lands a hip-toss, Bagwell cannot capitalize. DDP lands his tombstone like front-slam for two, DDP kicks away at Bagwell. Bagwell fights back from his knees, a gut punch. Inverted atomic drop and atomic drop by Bagwell, right hands by Bagwell. Clothesline by Bagwell, Irish whip and an elbow. Bagwell is on the apron, slingshot clothesline. Knees in the corner by Bagwell, elbow counter by DDP. Cover with the ropes for leverage for two, Bagwell lands an elbow and a tilt-a-whirl head-scissors. Bagwell looks for a fisherman suplex but DDP holds onto the ropes, lands a punch to the gut and a Diamond Cutter for the win.

 

Sad to see Bagwell has not evolved since the two years that I saw him last but that’s how it goes sometimes, DDP is continuing to rise the card which is great for him, still not the complete package at this part but the people are reacting to his bumping and his finish is one of the most protected.

 

Winner: DDP over Marcus Bagwell via Diamond Cutter!

 

(WCW Cruiserweight Championship Match) Dean Malenko © vs Rey Mysterio Jr.

This is the shit right here, we are going to get a disgustingly fun match so stylistically different from everything in the company and this crowd right here has no idea that their minds are going to be completely blown. Side headlock by Mysterio, hammerlock by Malenko. Wrist-lock by Malenko, Mysterio sweeps the leg for one. Wrist-lock by Mysterio, Malenko flips out but Mysterio kicks off as well. Two kip-ups, crowd applauds. Drop toehold by Malenko, STF.

 

We go to the ropes, clean break by Malenko. Side headlock by Mysterio, leapfrogs from both. Elbow by Mysterio into a beautiful arm-drag, Malenko is on the floor. Mysterio lands a springboard dropkick, Malenko is on the floor. Test of strength by Malenko, Mysterio tries a sunset flip but Malenko counters for a catapult to the floor. Malenko’s baseball slide does not work as Mysterio is too quick, Malenko catches the arm and kicks the elbow with Mysterio screaming in pain. Malenko stops the arm, hammerlock scoop slam. Shoulder thrust by Malenko, arm-drag into a key-lock. Cross arm-breaker, Mysterio reaches the ropes.

 

On the guardrail, Malenko kicks Mysterio’s arm hard. Boot by Malenko, Mysterio tries a hurricanrana but Malenko counters and lands a clothesline, cross arm-breaker again by Malenko. Malenko continues torturing the arm and lands another elbow to the arm, hammerlock belly to back suplex. Two for Malenko, another suplex on the arm for two. Irish whip and Mysterio lands a dropkick, Mysterio can’t capitalize so Malenko goes back to the arm. Malenko hammerlocks the arm and falls back Indian Death-Lock style on it, Fujiwara arm-bar by Malenko. Romero special into a German bridge for two, Mysterio was in the ropes.

 

Knee to the arm, stomp to the arm. Kimura attempt by Malenko, Mysterio escapes but another suplex takes down Mysterio for a close two. Butterfly suplex for two, Mysterio is working hard to not be pinned. Two arm-breakers and a Fujiwara arm-bar, Mysterio escapes the hold and runs Malenko to the floor. Mysterio elbows Malenko down and lands a dropkick, springboard somersault from Mysterio. Ridiculous move by Mysterio, Mysterio throws Malenko to the ring. Springboard dropkick for two, Malenko is up first. Mysterio almost rolls-up Malenko for two, Irish whip reversal by Malenko. Mysterio lands his West Coast Pop for two. Chops by Mysterio, Malenko elevates Mysterio to the apron. Mysterio lands a shoulder, Malenko catches Mysterio. Avalance Gut-Buster is blocked for a super hurricanrana, Mysterio counters a tilt-a-whirl into a splash, two for the challenger. Mysterio whips Malenko to the buckle, super hurricanrana is blocked for a powerbomb and Malenko places the feet on the ropes for the win.

 

Solid arm-work throughout by Malenko, thought it was a little long in places but when Mysterio was allowed to shine, Mysterio shone brightly. Moves that had the fans freaking out, Mysterio would be one of the most popular wrestlers on the roster after a mere amount of weeks. Malenko is a great base for Mysterio and unselfish in his efforts to allow Mysterio the spotlight when necessary. Some sequences could have been a little tighter and the arm-work a little more interesting but a nice blueprint for what would become more refined and awesome as the months and years passed.

 

Winner: Dean Malenko over Rey Mysterio via Powerbomb!

 

Big Bubba W/ Jimmy Hart vs John Tenta

Tenta was kicked out of The Dungeon and Bubba took some of his hair, they start on the floor with Bubba punching Tenta. Very strange for the heel to win a fist-fight to start, Tenta knocks Bubba off the top rope. Bubba meets the steel steps, Bubba begs for mercy. Tenta hip attacks Bubba, Bubba lands an uppercut and grabs something from his pants and nails Tenta in his face. Bubba hits his leg across the back three times, Bubba wants to go a fourth time but lands a beautiful uppercut. Ropes for leverage on the cover for two, Bubba falls on Tenta. Choking and gouging, Tenta is back up though and fights his way back into the match. Bubba whips Tenta to the buckle, Tenta’s foot is sent into the buckle.

 

Knees into the leg by Bubba, Bubba chokes Tenta with his singlet. Foot choke in the corner, Tenta sends Bubba to the buckle. Tenta misses a splash, belly to back suplex by Bubba. Bubba is on the top rope, Tenta lands a slam for the win as Bubba dives into his arms.

 

Ugh very slow from the two big men, incredible compared to the prior match. Bubba can have good matches with big men that are stiff and full of big pumps but that did not happen here sadly.

 

Winner: John Tenta over Big Bubba via Powerslam!

 

(Falls Count Anywhere Match) Chris Benoit vs Kevin Sullivan W/ Jimmy Hart

Sullivan took out Pillman in his own words so Sullivan wants to take out another Horsemen, Sullivan also left Benoit to get sent through a table by Public Enemy. This match starts in the aisleway, Benoit lands a massive clothesline. Now they go to the ring, Benoit chops and throws right hands at Sullivan. Eye rake by Sullivan to regain control, they are in the crowd. They are brawling now in the crowd, Sullivan lands a nasty shot to the eye. They make their way to the bathroom, Benoit has the bathroom door slammed on his head. Double stomp before Benoit blocks being sent into the urinal but slams the door on Sullivan’s head, eye poke by Sullivan. Benoit is sent into the laundry shoot, kitchen towels are tossed on Benoit.

 

They choke one another by the entrance to the toilet, trash can to the head. Benoit hits Sullivan with the trash can, they brawl down the steps and back to ringside. Sullivan throws a chair, Benoit places Sullivan groin-first on the guardrail. Benoit wants a table, Sullivan meets the guardrail. Sullivan is into the crowd again, Benoit pulls out the table. Sullivan is smashed in the head, we have the table in the ring. Benoit is whipped onto the table, Sullivan misses a splash. Sullivan elevates Benoit onto the table which is placed on the top rope, Sullivan is met by Benoit with punches. Superplex and this is over!

 

Love the physicality of this one, this would take a darker turn as time progressed with real-life complications but here at this moment is two tough motherfuckers beating the piss out of one another. Really felt like the two hate one another, good brawling through the crowd which was rare enough so the fans react big time, a meaty finish with a monster superplex and then Anderson turns on Sullivan so the crowd is big-time happy with this moment.

 

Winner: Chris Benoit over Kevin Sullivan via Superplex!

 

Lord Steven Regal vs Sting

This is rather odd, Regal who has been mostly a tag team guy since 1994 suddenly challenging Sting right before The Outsiders take over, this feels like the trajectory Regal should have been on after dropping the television championship but it’s two years later than I expected it to happen. Sting comes right out with right hands and chops, Regal is on the floor. Into the guardrail and a back body-drop, Regal begs for mercy and thumbs Sting in the eye. Forearms and uppercuts, Sting is rocked. Snap-mare into a knee drop for two, side headlock by Regal. Sting drops down and lands a Japanese arm-drag, Regal talks trash with the fans. Regal asks for a handshake, Sting refuses. Regal sweeps the leg, Regal uses a cobra clutch before landing big elbows.

 

Uppercuts by Regal, full-nelson stretch by Regal. Sunset flip by Sting for two, Regal regains control with an elbow. Another stretch by Regal, Sting escapes but eats a lot of elbows. Regal measures and lands a dropkick to the head for two, elbow to the head and Regal talks trash. Knees to the head and an uppercut, Regal has a reverse chin-lock. Sting counters with a belly to back suplex, Regal lands a leg drop to the arm. Sting cannot escape as Regal applies a side headlock on the ground, Regal uses his elbows to the back of Sting’s head. Sting fights back applying an abdominal stretch, Regal makes it to the ropes. Regal lands a huge left to the face, Regal stretches Sting again with a head-scissors hold.

 

Regal uses Sting hair to pull him down, Sting keeps coming back. Forearms but Sting is not going down, eye poke by Regal. Kicks and uppercuts, butterfly hold from Regal. Sting reverses an Irish whip and lands a dropkick and series of clotheslines for two, top rope butterfly suplex for two by Regal. Regal Stretch! Sting does not tap, Regal lands uppercuts and forearms. A backhand slap is a bad idea, Sting is alive. Right hands and chops by Sting, Regal is being battered down. Stinger Splash is blocked by knees, Regal is back-dropped though. Scorpion Death-Lock in the middle of the ring, Regal has to give up!

 

I liked this match a lot, Regal is a different style to what Sting is used to and it’s on the second Regal starts nailing his elbows and uppercuts, it is vicious throughout with all the various submissions and it works so well as Sting just eats all of it and comes out with all that fire, crowd erupts for that Scorpion Death-Lock and I love Regal sells it like absolute death, fighting to escape the hold throughout, just really good professional wrestling.

 

Winner: Sting over Lord Steven Regal via Scorpion Death-Lock!

 

Ric Flair & Arn Anderson W/ Miss Elizabeth & Woman vs Kevin Greene & Steve Mongo McMichael

Comes totally out of nowhere, we were having Savage wanting to kill this man and now we have ex-professional football players throwing down with The Horsemen? What a risk to put all that pressure on The Horsemen to carry two people who have never worked, Anderson to start with Mongo. Anderson out-wrestlers Mongo and shoves him off like a punk, Mongo works the arm before Anderson trips up Mongo. Anderson tries to wrestle the Mongo style and it does not work as Mongo shoulder blocks the shit out of Anderson. Anderson tricks Mongo into doing it again, drop toehold by Anderson who stomps the shit out of Mongo. Mongo meets the buckle, boot smashes Anderson. Middle rope diving tackle by Mongo, Flair is outraged. In comes Greene and they stomp the shit out of Anderson.

 

Savage nails Anderson too, Anderson regroups and wants a piece of Greene. Greene is jacked, Greene wants Flair. Flair begins strutting, Flair is on fine form. Flair uses the referee to kick Greene in the head, right hand to the face. Chops and right hands by Flair, Greene shoves off Flair. Shoulder tackle to both Horsemen, Greene struts before Savage throws Flair back in, back body-drop and a clothesline. Tag to Mongo, Anderson is scared off the apron. Mongo lands shoulder block after shoulder block, Mongo is lured into the corner. Boots by Flair, Mongo shakes off the chop. Mongo shakes off the punches and chops Flair, Flair is hip-tossed and Flair begs for mercy.

 

Back body drop by Mongo, Flair is begging for mercy. Eye poke by Flair, Flair tries going high but Mongo slams Flair off the top rope. Flair is begging for mercy, Mongo puts the figure four on Flair and Greene puts on the figure four on Anderson. Woman rakes the eyes of Mongo, all the wives and valets are out of here. Anderson tags in Flair, Flair chops and tosses Mongo to the floor. Anderson kicks Mongo over and over, Savage tries to make the save. In the ring, Flair lands a knee-drop and Anderson comes in and stomps the gut. Middle rope choke by Anderson, Flair attacks Mongo behind the referee’s back.

 

Double suplex on Mongo, double choke too. Greene wipes out Anderson with a tackle, Flair & Anderson are beating down Mongo. Mongo atomic drops Anderson into Flair, this is the hot-tag moment. Tag to Greene who takes out the legs of Anderson, scoop slams galore. Back-body-drop, powerslam by Greene. Flair begs for mercy, Flair Flip and Mongo lands a boot to the face. Suplex into the ring, Anderson chop-blocks Greene. Greene is in a bad way, Anderson and Flair are isolating Greene. Shin-breaker by Flair, Flair applies The Figure Four! Benoit comes down and Savage brawls with Benoit before Anderson makes the save. Debra McMichaels is here with Woman & Elizabeth, there is a briefcase here. Mongo nails Kevin Greene with the briefcase and Flair covers for the win, Mongo is a Horsemen.

 

So this match is very interesting for a number of reasons, the first for me is Bobby Heenan being a manager for the first time in WCW, they have had this man in their company for at least 3 years by this point and Heenan was never used in that capacity and here he is being used only to be out of the position by the next month and Heenan will never be a heel again. The second interesting part is having two non-wrestlers in there with two wrestlers, the confidence and skill of Flair to make anyone look competent is staggering, truly a special wrestler. Mongo being a permanent member of the wrestling roster was also a potential risk but they have faith in Mongo and knowing his current condition makes me very sad. Fun match that had no right being that good with an interesting turn at the end of the match.

 

Winners: The Horsemen over Mongo & Kevin Greene via Briefcase To The Head!

 

(WCW World Heavyweight Championship Match) The Giant © W/ Jimmy Hart vs Lex Luger

Luger is a double champion and runs right into the boot of Giant, stomps by Giant. Irish whip and Luger ducks the clothesline, punches and clothesline. Giant lands on his feet, Giant places Luger on his shoulders and back into the ring. Giant tries to step back in the ring but Luger is all over him, Luger has a sleeper on Giant. Sting is here to stop Jimmy Hart getting involved, Sting chases away Jimmy Hart. Giant whips Luger to the buckle, forearm shots to the back. Foot choke in the corner, whip to the opposite buckle and a back-breaker. Back-breaker stretch from Giant, Argentine back-breaker from Giant.

 

Luger is dropped to the mat, Luger fights back and tries a scoop slam but Giant falls on top of Luger. Massive stomp to the lower back, Giant is executing his game plan very well to stop the rack. Luger comes back with huge clothesline and few forearms, Giant is wobbling. Chop-block from Luger, rights and lefts by Luger. Giant shoves away Luger, Giant misses a corner splash. Luger lands massive shots to the ribs, Luger wants The Torture Rack. Luger is squashed by Giant, the pain in his back was simply too much. Chokeslam by Giant and this match is over.

 

Not a great main event by any stretch of the imagination, it’s crazy though to see what happens with Giant moving forward, the most unstoppable force possibly ever in WCW, Giant had beaten Savage, Flair, Sting and Luger and to know what comes next is shocking. Luger is over with the fans but not a lot going on in this match to have the fans on the edge of their seats, Sting was far and away the better option for WCW against Giant and that’s why this is a bad main event, Luger can’t keep the fans interested like The Stinger and this leads to a disappointing main event.

 

Winner: The Giant over Lex Luger via Chokeslam!

 

That was WCW’s Great American Bash 1996, a glimpse into what WCW would become in the coming years while also showcasing the death of the other side of WCW. This is the final review of WCW for me so I want to take my time here and articulate all  my thoughts about the company as it has taken me about 2 years to get through at least 10 years of WCW content. We shall first look at this PPV as a whole, it starts off with the most meaty of tag team matches, timing is abysmal at times, it is not exactly what I had envisioned with The Steiners returning but two babyface teams go at it and hit hard. Looks like a car wreck at times so a bit tighter and I probably would have been a bit more happy. Konnan vs El Gato is what every Konnan match is here before he found his personality in WCW, some good wrestling but little reaction. It’s not working despite the big push and the fans just do not want to see Konnan.

 

DDP vs Bagwell is very tame, I stand by my claim that Bagwell despite his youth and inexperience, has not progressed at all since his tag team days. He’s bland and DDP is getting better as a worker but as a heel, still needs a likeable babyface to carry some fire into these matches. There is no fire here, there is no heat and The Diamond Cutter is welcomed not only by the bored reviewer here but also the fans, not a good sign for Bagwell. A sign of the future is Rey Mysterio vs Dean Malenko, a little slow in parts but these two tear it up when it is time to tear it up, Mysterio has been made as a star and the cruiserweight division will go on to earn rave reviews as everyone was insanely talented in the division. Things dip massively with Big Bubba vs John Tenta, it’s not fun nor exciting.

 

Benoit vs Sullivan is so intense and interesting, I love it much like Finlay vs Regal. These two guys do not like one another and proceed to hammer one another to prove that point to everyone in the building, crowd-brawling was fun before it was worn out later in the 90s and the finish garners a monster reaction. Great match, things continue on the positivity side with Regal vs Sting with Regal showcasing the ability he had and the position he deserved that was ripped from him in 1994. Shame this would probably be the peak for Regal in the company as the main event scene would become too packed and cluttered in the following months and years. Flair & Anderson vs Greene & Mongo overachieves so much, it’s ridiculous. Kudos to Flair & Anderson, they take two people who shouldn’t be able to have even a decent match and they have a very fun match at the end of the night. Main event is very bad, Sting is the only one in there who can garner a reaction against Giant, Luger couldn’t keep the fans interested and it shows.

 

Now onto how I felt watching WCW from roughly 1986 to 1996, I initially covered WCW by watching The Formation of The NWO to the closure of the company and there were some might highs along the way and some crushing lows too. However, I wanted to see what it was like before, how WCW grew and adapted throughout the years. WCW was a great alternative to the WWF, the presentation was grittier, the angles more realistic and the style was exciting to watch. I could never shake the feeling that the company was always one step behind though and one step away from meltdown. For every Flair vs Funk, Flair vs Steamboat, Sting vs Vader, Dangerous Alliance vs Sting’s Squadron, the company was losing stars or making bone-headed decisions.

 

The gimmick attached to Starrcade year after year made it difficult to watch whether it was the tournament edition from 1989 or the consecutive Battle Bowls, the company was always shooting itself in the foot. Losing the likes of Sid, Flair, Bulldog, Steamboat and the likes of Sting to injury at key times made progress a difficult goal to attain. Arguably my favourite period was 1992/1993 WCW with Vader and Sting having classics, The Dangerous Alliance and the rise of the likes of Pillman, Austin & Regal. However, a dramatic shift would occur with Hogan joining the company and all the progress would be erased. I do find it sad never seeing how Pillman would have developed, how Austin would have been in The Main Event, how Rude & Steamboat would have done if they had not had injuries that ended their careers and how Sting would have done if they had put him at the top of the mountain but sadly, it was not meant to be when it came to WCW and after watching so many PPVs, I am happy for the highs and I would gladly say that I would do it all over again. Thanks for reading and checking out any of my stupid ramblings about the sport of professional wrestling!

 

 

WCW Slamboree 1996 Review!

Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that continues to operate long after it should have died! Hey it’s WCW Slamboree 1996 and look, they brought back The Battle Bowl concept, kill me now. I hate this concept, I hate everything about it, it pisses all over every feud they have going in the company and I am sure these events never did any good business, they used it at 2 Starrcades in the early 90s and I thought I had escaped this shite but no how I was once again wrong, I am not even going to get into the matches. Let’s just get this over with.

 

Animal & Booker T vs Hawk & Lex Luger

I have hated this three-way feud between these teams and they just won’t let it die, why do I have to keep being tortured with this crap, imagine creating a PPV of just tag team matches, no variety whatsoever. Animal vs Luger to start, Booker is talking shit with Animal. They lock-up, Luger has Animal in the corner. No clean break from Luger, right hands and clubbing blows. Powerslam by Luger, Animal pushes Luger to the corner. Shoulder thrusts by Animal, clothesline by Animal. Powerslam by Animal, flying shoulder block by Animal. Luger lands a clubbing blow and delivers a suplex but Animal no-sells. Dropkick and tag to Booker, Animal and Booker are shoving one another. Heel kick by Booker, knees in the corner.

 

Luger is whipped to the buckle, boot by Luger but Booker is too quick. Booker slaps on a reverse chin-lock, Luger elbows his way out of the hold but Booker lands a kick to the ribs and lands a Scissors Kick. Hawk makes the save, Luger & Hawk are brawling with one another and of course, Animal backs up Hawk. Brawl with everyone on the floor, crowd reacts which is nice. Luger is backing away, Booker T is wiped out by Hawk and the crowd counts for a double-count-out!

 

So if you are keeping score, The Road Warriors have had three horrific matches in a row on PPV, at least they did the JOB in the last one but this concept sucks and I just want to die already and this was the first match. Brutal times ahead for me, please pray for me.

 

Double Count-Out!

 

The Public Enemy vs The Taskmaster Kevin Sullivan & Chris Benoit

Sullivan and Benoit hate one another while The Public Enemy were lucky enough to stay together, Benoit and Rocco Rock to start, they slap one another. Eye rake by Rocco, big uppercut. Irish whip reversed by Benoit, flying head-scissors by Rocco. Shove by Benoit, Benoit rakes the eyes and lands headbutt. Hurricanrana by Rocco, Rocco dances and stomps on Benoit. Benoit reverses an Irish whip and powerbombs the shit out of Rocco. Benoit dances and beats the piss out of Rocco, slap across the face. Tag to Taskmaster, slaps to the chest. Grunge comes in and Benoit takes care of him, we are on the floor and weapons are flying. Chairs to the head and hold on a second, a table is just setup ready to use. The fuck is this haha, Rocco places Taskmaster on the table. Rocco is cut off by a clothesline by Benoit, Rocco from the apron suplexes Benoit to the floor.

 

Rocco puts Benoit on the table, Sullivan is on top of Benoit. Sullivan dodges but Benoit is put through the table by Grunge & Rocco, Sullivan walks out on Benoit and Benoit is pinned through Grunge holding down his foot.

 

Not much of a match really, I liked the physicality as Benoit always brings the pain, a table bump is always appreciated and it continues the feud between Benoit & Sullivan.

 

Winners: The Public Enemy over Benoit & Sullivan via Splash Through The Table!

 

Sgt. Craig Pittman W/ Teddy Long & Scott Steiner vs The Booty Man W/ The Booty Babe & Rick Steiner

The idea of Scott Steiner beating the shite out of Booty Man pleases me, please give me what I need WCW. Pittman and Booty to start, fuck this company. Pittman does a series of waistlocks and it’s boring, Scott comes in and shoulder blocks Booty Man, Booty lands a hip-toss and a knee before Scott drills Booty with a tiger driver, fuck yes. Pittman is in (Damn You!), Booty has a wrist-lock and in comes Rick, they lock-up and Pittman lands a knee and big impact blows. Rick lands a shoulder block and a powerslam, Pittman German suplexes the shit out of Rick. Rick clubs the life out of Pittman with a Steinerline, Pittman tags in Scott. Crowd wants to see it between the two, they lock-up and Scott has Rick in the ropes.

 

Firemen’s carry by Scott, judo hip throw by Rick. Waist-locks from both men, Scott lands a massive exploder suplex. Rick lands a Steinerline, small package by Scott for two. Rick reverses an Irish whip, Scott lands two clotheslines and goes for a full-nelson. Rick reverses and lands a dragon suplex, Scott lands a middle rope exploder suplex on Rick, Booty Man is here. Scott dodges a corner spear, Booty Man hits the ring-post hard. Pittman is looking for Code Red, Booty Man makes the tag to survive. Rick lands a German suplex for the win, Scott is disgusted.

 

Another quick match, Scott vs Rick was awesome, shame when they actually feuded that Scott could barely move. Some beautifully nasty bumps in here though, needed more Booty Man being massacred though.

 

Winners: Rick Steiner & Booty Man over Scott Steiner & Craig Pittman via German Suplex!

 

The Blue Bloods vs V.K. Wallstreet & Hacksaw Jim Duggan

Duggan vs Regal to start, lots of stalling to begin. Lock-up, Duggan has Regal in the corner but Regal lands an elbow to the face, Duggan lands a hip-toss. Wallstreet does not want to tag Duggan, Duggan lands a clothesline, make it three. Wallstreet is in and Dave Taylor is in too, Taylor works the arm and tags in Regal. Lots of mat-wrestling here, uppercuts galore. Duggan is aggressively tagged, Duggan & Wallstreet talk smack to one another. Regal takes control with a forearm, Duggan & Regal bang heads. Taylor is tagged in, Duggan decks everyone with right hands. Duggan has a taped fist, Taylor is knocked out!

 

Well that was quick and to the point, good for Duggan who was arguably more over than everyone in the ring so why not push him big time.

 

Winners: Jim Duggan & VK Wallstreet over The Blue Bloods via Taped Fist!

 

Dirty Dick Slater & Bobby Eaton vs The Dancing Fools

Slater pushes Disco to the corner, clean break by Slater. Leg trip and Slater works the leg before Disco shoves off Slater. Elbows and chops by Slater, Disco tags in Wright. Eaton comes in with big right hands, Eaton whips Wright to the buckle, uppercuts by Wright. Hip-toss and dropkick by Wright, head-scissors and flying wheel kick. Tag to Slater, Disco gets the tag too. Right hands all around, elbows for Eaton. Match breaks down with all 4 in the ring, Disco lands an elbow in the corner. Slater cracks Disco in the back of the head with his boot. Just why must I watch this tournament?

 

Winners: Dick Slater & Bobby Eaton over The Dancing Fools via Boot to The Head!

 

DDP & The Barbarian vs Hugh Morrus & Meng

A mysterious benefactor has given DDP the means to come back to WCW, oh joy for DDP. I have to say though having watched DDP go from curtain jerker to TV champion to now, the man got his act together and got in shape very well. DDP looks almost like a different person, it’s crazy. Eye-poke and arm-wrench by DDP, shoulder thrusts and a side headlock. Morrus looks to reverse, DDP uses the hair to maintain control. Shoulder block and DDP is on the floor, Morrus tries a plancha and splats on the floor hard. DDP delivers a huge clothesline, tag to Barbarian. Morrus lands a clubbing blow and Meng comes in, the two partners are going to destroy one another. Chops and kicks by Meng, Barbarian pokes the eyes and lands a shoulder block.

 

Elbows to the head, clubbing blows but no movement. Spinning kick by Barbarian, down goes Meng. Assisted splash by DDP and Barbarian, Meng dodges an elbow drop and lands a headbutt on Barbarian. Tag to Morrus, scoop slam and Morrus climbs high. Diving elbow drop for two, DDP crotches Morrus. Barbarian wants a belly to belly and it connects! Meng makes the save, Hugh Morrus lands his Moonsault but DDP makes the save. DDP and Meng are brawling, superkick by both Barbarian & Meng but DDP has his foot under the ropes while Morrus did not so DDP & Barbarian advance.

 

Winners: DDP & Barbarian over Meng & Hugh Morrus via Superkick!

 

Big Bubba & Stevie Ray vs Fire & Ice

 

Stevie Ray & Norton to start, clean break by Norton and Stevie Ray takes advantage, scoop slam by Stevie. Norton reverses an Irish whip and lands a flying shoulder tackle, belly thrusts in the corner. Stevie blocks Norton twice with a boot, big clothesline by Stevie. Bubba is in, wind-up punch by Bubba. Corner splash, spinebuster by Bubba for two. Ice Train is in, splash but only two for Ice Train. Clothesline with both men down, Norton is in. Face-buster by Norton, Bubba and Stevie Ray bang heads and Fire & Ice nail a shoulder block for the win. Lame!

 

Fire & Ice over Big Bubba & Stevie Ray via Shoulder Block!

 

Arn Anderson & Eddie Guerrero vs Ric Flair & Randy Savage

Arn Anderson attacks Savage before the bell and Flair attacks Savage too, Flair and Eddie are brawling now with Eddie showing Flair that this will not be easy, forearms and a dropkick. Flair is begging for mercy, Woman & Miss Elizabeth are here! Lock-up, Flair chops Eddie but Eddie is drilling him back. Back body-drop and dropkicks by Eddie, eye-poke by Flair. Flair attacks Savage again, Flair allows Anderson to tag into the match so that Anderson can rough up Savage. Anderson shoves Savage to the corner, shoulder thrusts and forearms. Savage boots Anderson after an Irish whip, Spinebuster by Anderson for two. Flair tags into the match and beats the piss out of Savage, Eddie lands an eye-poke and chops on Flair.

 

Flair Flop, dropkick from Eddie. Tornado DDT lands, Savage goes after Flair. Anderson and Eddie are talking before Anderson wipes out Eddie with a DDT, Anderson attacks Savage. Flair is going to steal a win over Eddie, Ric Flair steals the win!

 

More short matches where I would rather see matches between everyone who was feuding instead of this crap, big part here though as Elizabeth slaps Savage.

 

Winners: Randy Savage & Ric Flair over Anderson & Eddie Guerrero via DDT!

 

(WCW Cruiserweight Championship Match) Dean Malenko © vs Brad Armstrong

The Ice Man Dean Malenko became champion by defeating Shinjiro Otani so we have the beginning of something special here in WCW with the cruiserweight championship. Brad Armstrong is your favourite worker’s favourite opponent if he was in WCW during the late 80s. Nobody says Brad Armstrong was not the shit, the man was like a machine but could never have that gimmick or charisma that would take him beyond being everyone favourite’s worker.

 

Standing switches from both men, Malenko drop toeholds but Armstrong wriggles free for a rings of Saturn like stretch, hammerlock into a side headlock. Malenko turns the tide, leap-frogs before a massive enzuigiri from Armstrong. Both men try hip-tosses, Malenko lands a headbutt before Armstrong lands a hip-toss and a dropkick. Malenko is on the floor recharging the batteries. Test of strength fake from Malenko, short dropkick to the knee. Armstrong is in trouble, Malenko sends the knee into the ring-post. Malenko stretches the leg of Armstrong, Armstrong makes it to the ropes. Malenko lands a scoop slam, Malenko lands a middle rope knee-drop to the leg. Shin-breaker and a standing leg lock from Malenko, Armstrong is placed in the tree of woe. Armstrong almost scores an upset with a sunset flip, Malenko is quickly out and works the leg.

 

Heel hook leads to a rope break, Malenko snaps the leg off of the ring apron. Another scoop slam, Malenko tries a splash but Armstrong blocks with a boot to the face. Irish whip and right hand by Armstrong, powerslam by Armstrong. Armstrong is going high risk, missile dropkick from Armstrong. Armstrong puts Malenko in The Texas Cloverleaf! What is going on here? Malenko makes it to the ropes, Malenko pulls Armstrong to the floor. Armstrong is on the apron, Malenko’s head meets the ring-post. Malenko nails a top-rope gut-buster on Armstrong for the win!

 

Another brief match, loved Malenko’s leg work throughout the match even though Armstrong did not sell it towards the end of the match, only remembering to when it was necessary. Didn’t think Malenko used that gut-buster as a finish but stranger things have happened and it does look nasty, a breathe of fresh air on this terrible card.

 

Winner: Dean Malenko over Brad Armstrong via Top-Rope Gut-Buster!

 

Bobby Eaton & Dick Slater vs Hacksaw Jim Duggan & V.K. Wallstreet

Duggan beat the crap out of his partner earlier so the idea they would even come out together is ridiculous but here we are, the bell rings and Duggan is tearing up Wallstreet. Eaton & Slater are here now, they get the jump on Duggan & Wallstreet before Duggan turns the tide, Wallstreet knees Duggan to the floor. Slater lands a Russian leg-sweep on Wallstreet for two, elbow by Slater. Eaton comes in, back body-drop by Wallstreet. Duggan headbutts Eaton on the floor, abdominal stretch by Wallstreet. Slater makes the save, Duggan waffles Eaton & Slater. Duggan & Slater come into the ring, Duggan knocks down Slater for two, reverse chin-lock from Duggan.

 

Slater and Duggan collide off a comical shoulder block, tag to Wallstreet & Eaton. Wallstreet showing me why I hated him all those years ago by flopping, Eaton slams Wallstreet. Eaton is yanked off the top rope, Wallstreet nails Duggan by mistake, Duggan smacks Wallstreet back and Eaton gets the roll-up win!

 

Ugh how many more matches of this shit do I have to sit through?

 

Winners: Eaton & Slater over Duggan & Wallstreet via Roll-Up!

 

The Public Enemy vs Ric Flair & Randy Savage

Imagine The Public Enemy getting two PPV matches on one night, double payday. Savage comes out after Flair to jump Flair and security takeaway Savage, why didn’t this happen when Flair attacked Savage? That’s a bit bizarre, The American Males are here. Wow been a wild since I saw Bagwell on PPV, maybe 1994? Public Enemy win by forfeit!

 

Winners: The Public Enemy!

 

DDP & The Barbarian vs The Booty Man & Rick Steiner

DDP talks to Booty Babe, Booty Man is not happy. Big right hand by Booty Man, tag to Steiner. Steiner and Booty fuck-up a spot, great stuff. Steiner slams DDP hard for two, Steiner wants ten punches in the corner but DDP flapjacks Steiner onto the turnbuckle. In comes Barbarian who boots Steiner before being suplexed by The Dog-Faced Gremlin, middle rope belly to belly suplex. Steinerline for two, Barbarian clubs down Steiner. Powerbomb by Barbarian, two for Barbarian. Barbarian tosses Steiner over the top rope behind the referee’s back, DDP stomps all over Steiner. Barbarian lands a corner clothesline, clothesline and a second clothesline goes wrong as Steiner lands a stungun. High Knee by Booty Man, DDP makes the save. Booty Man tries an O’Connor roll but DDP lands an elbow to the head and Barbarian covers for the win.

 

Winners: DDP & Barbarian over Booty Man & Rick Steiner via Elbow!

 

(WCW United States Heavyweight Championship Match) Konnan © vs Jushin Liger

I don’t think even Sonny Onoo can make Jushin Liger a heel on this night as Konnan comes out looking like a massively jacked heel. Lock-up, trip and interesting move from Konnan, they trade wrist-locks and pin-fall attempts. Chops by Liger, snap-mare and a senton by the challenger. Onoo lands some martial arts kicks but it doesn’t work out for Onoo, baseball slide and plancha by Liger. Brainbuster by Liger for two, Konnan tries stretching Liger who reverses and stretches Konnan. Camel clutch by Liger, single leg Boston crab attempt. Konnan begins to fight back, both men slap one another before Liger lands a kappu kick.

 

Liger lifts Konnan onto the top rope, superplex by Liger. Liger calls for something big from the top, diving splash from the top for two. Liger tries a splash to the floor but Konnan lands a dropkick, Liger dodges an elbow in the ring and lands a belly to back suplex. Liger lands a fisherman buster for a close two, Liger is whipped to the buckle. Liger tries a head-scissors out of the corner but Konnan counters for an alabama slam. Konnan wanted a Splash Mountain Bomb but Liger rolls out for a sunset flip and a close two, Liger wants a Liger-Bomb. It connects, 1…2…. Konnan kicks out at the last moment! Scoop slam by Liger, Konnan blocks with a boot. Konnan lands The Power Drive and it’s over!

 

Again when I see Konnan in WCW, I become curious about how he comes across in AAA because he had to have some sort of magic factor to have people lose their minds over the guy. Liger doesn’t know how to have a bad match especially during this era so they drop bombs and while the crowd doesn’t care, I am eating it up but the question has to be asked: Why are they pushing Konnan so hard when the crowd doesn’t care.

 

Winner: Konnan over Jushin Liger via Power Drive!

 

(Battle-Bowl Match)

Eight men battling for the title of “Lord of The Ring”, a prestigious title that can only be held by the bets of the best so who do we have here tonight? Ice Train, Scott Norton, Dick Slater, Bobby Eaton, Public Enemy, Barbarian and DDP. Oh yeah, that just screams the best of WCW. Everyone is paring off in corners, lots of punching so if that’s your thing, you will be in heaven in this one. Barbarian almost boots out DDP. Finally Rocco Rock is thrown out as Barbarian back-drops him out, Slater smashes Eaton with his boot and Eaton is eliminated.

 

Eaton decks Parker with a right hand, it is beautiful. Slater must be eliminated as the camera misses it, Slater & Eaton brawl to the back. DDP throws out Scott Norton with a back-drop, what a random last four. Powerslam by Ice Train on Barbarian, DDP and Grunge. DDP drops Barbarian with a Diamond Cutter, Cutter on Ice Train and Grunge. DDP pins Grunge, DDP pins Ice Train and DDP does not pin Barbarian. Barbarian catches the foot of DDP, clothesline by Barbarian for two. Barbarian spikes DDP with a tombstone for a close two, Barbarian has the sleeper, DDP lands a low-blow. Irish whip but DDP lowers his head, Barbarian wants a powerbomb. Another two, scoop slam by Barbarian. Diving headbutt misses, Diamond Cutter and it’s over.

 

Big moment for DDP, they obviously have plans for DDP who is working very hard to improve his craft, good for him although there will always be rumours of how his relations to Bischoff and The Wolfpac would impact his career.

 

Winner: DDP over Barbarian via Diamond Cutter!

 

(WCW World Heavyweight Championship Match) The Giant © W/ Jimmy Hart vs Sting

Jimmy Hart & Lex Luger are going to be handcuffed to one another on the floor, this feels very bizarre as I love Sting while WCW has done everything to make him a backup to Hogan & Savage and even Flair in 1993 but here is Sting in 1996 challenging for the championship when Sting has been in the tag team scene for months at this point. Giant was rough with Hogan guiding him, how will he do with Sting. Both men show great speed to kick us off, Sting tries a crossbody and bounces off like nothing, Sting is talking shit with Giant. Giant eats a right-hand and tries a sleeper, the crowd come alive for the first time tonight.

 

Sting lands a dropkick, make it two and a clothesline too! Giant laughs in Sting’s face, Sting is on the floor re-evaluating his strategy. Sting wanted a slam but Giant falls on Sting for a close two, Giant steps all over Sting’s chest. Elbow drop by Giant, Luger is firing up the crowd. Giant whips Sting, elbow to the face. Giant shoulder thrusts Sting over and over, whip to the opposite buckle. Sting fights back, Giant clubs down the challenger. Low headbutt by Giant, elbow drops by Giant. Body-scissors by Giant, Giant also uses the ropes for leverage. Giant whips Sting, Sting kicks Giant in the face so Giant shoves Sting to the floor.

 

Giant throws Sting towards the stage, Luger has Jimmy Hart on the table. Giant cannot throw Sting through the table, clever from Luger. Sting is on the apron and elbows the referee by mistake, Giant is watching in the corner. Giant misses a splash, Sting kicks Giant in the ribs and Sting lands a Stinger Splash. Giant is being battered, Luger & Jimmy Hart watch on from the apron. Sting tries to save Luger who is being choked by Giant, Sting lands three Stinger Splashes.

 

Sting manages to put down The Giant with boots, Jimmy Hart is on the top rope. Sting tries a Stinger Splash but Jimmy Hart is pulled down from the buckle by Luger possibly, Sting headbutts Giant in the balls. Diving Top Rope Splash by Sting for two, Giant presses Sting onto the referee. Sting is climbing again, second splash. Scorpion Death-Lock, Luger and Jimmy Hart are fighting over the megaphone. Sting is clocked with the megaphone, was it an accident? Giant lands The Chokeslam for the win!

 

Well I am not sure if the crowd loves Sting like I do or they were so bored by the piss-poor action before this match but they are fired up here and Sting brings everything he can to the limited Giant and the result is quite a fun match. They have clearly put months into Luger coming back and will he turn on Sting, will he not and we continue that drama with the finish here appearing as Luger smashed Sting with the megaphone. Shame that ultimately it will go nowhere in about two months but hey it looked great here. Giant and Sting are infinitely more mobile and fun than Hogan vs Giant, different dynamic and some fun near-falls here with a referee bump too! Good main event made a thousand times better than everything before it being shite!

 

Winner: The Giant over Sting via Chokeslam!

 

That was WCW’s Slamboree 1996, a possible contender for one of the worst PPVs that I had to watch during this series. The Battle Bowl concept is horrible, it drops all feuds in the name of a battle royal that doesn’t feel like a Royal Rumble. The random teams thrown together get in the way of the interesting feuds I want to see, I would rather Savage vs Flair again than this tag match nonsense, Savage lost Elizabeth last month, why is he not trying to murder Flair for stealing her from him? Anyways, the concept is boring, the matches are short and the other singles matches are inoffensive, leaving no real impression on the mind after they had taken place. However, the crowd and I wake up for the main event, Sting shows why Sting should be WCW Champion in a matter of minutes and has some good drama to add to the Sting & Luger story. So this PPV was a rough one to get through because so many short matches back to back can be just as draining as bad matches. Thanks for reading and remember: there’s always another night!

 

WCW Uncensored 1996 Review!

Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that doesn’t have Brad Shephard blocked! It’s WCW Uncensored 1996, the Alliance to end Hulkamania is here to destroy Hulk Hogan! Konnan vs Eddie Guerrero for the United States Championship, Finlay vs Regal and a number one contender’s match between Giant and Loch Ness aka Giant Haystacks of British Wrestling Fame.

 

(WCW United States Heavyweight Championship Match) Konnan © vs Eddie Guerrero

Much better than having to watch One Man Gang in there with Konnan, this should be fun. Lock-up and clean break from Eddie, Konnan takes the back. Rings of Saturn stretch by Konnan, arm-drag by Konnan. Eddie lands an arm-drag of his own and slaps on a figure four, Konnan makes it to the ropes. Konnan shoots for the ankle, both men show some nice pinning skills before we end in a clean break. Konnan takes the back but Eddie shows superior skills here and applies a stretch to Konnan, Konnan takes the legs and goes for a heel hook. Konnan transitions into a Boston crab, Konnan blocks the arm-drag and lands one of his own. Eddie lands one too, both show great speed and slap one another.

 

Dropkick by Eddie, uppercut and Eddie places Konnan on the top rope. Camel clutch by Eddie, Konnan fights back with a side headlock. Arm-drags by Konnan, Eddie is on the floor. Side headlock takedown by Eddie, Konnan uses his legs to try and break the hold. Konnan uses another stretch hold on Eddie, Eddie lands on his feet out of a monkey flip. Arm-drag and a tilt-a-whirl head-scissors. Diving crossbody to the floor, slingshot splash by Eddie for two. Head-scissors choke by Eddie, Konnan lands a German suplex. Eddie counters the second with a pin, Konnan counters another suplex with a pin attempt but it’s two all around for both. Clothesline by Konnan, Hurricanrana by Eddie. Eddie rolls through for two, Konnan fights back and goes for a powerbomb. Splash-Mountain Bomb for two!

 

Konnan sends Eddie to the floor, suicide dive by Konnan. Eddie slips out of a suplex, Konnan lands a pair of elbows and a clothesline for two. Eddie stops Konnan climbing the top rope, superplex by Eddie. Two for Eddie, Eddie is on the top rope. Konnan tries a powerslam but Eddie counters for a small package for two. Eddie tries a leap-frog and Konnan headbutts Eddie right in the balls and covers for the win.

 

Ballsy to put this match out there for twenty minutes but they are both very good workers, felt the chemistry was a little off here at times especially with the mat-work that seemed to take the crowd out of it at times but Eddie’s talents shine through here with the fans preferring Eddie in this match. This sort of high-speed match with arm-drags and aerial moves would become the norm very soon in WCW but the crowd is still adjusting to this style.

 

Winner: Konnan over Eddie Guerrero via Headbutt Down Low!

 

Lord Steven Regal W/ Jeeves vs The Belfast Bruiser

I remember with Regal had Bill Dundee as his manager but no idea about Jeeves, Belfast Bruiser is here and things are going to get incredibly stiff. Glad to see Regal back on PPV though, Bruiser comes in and smashes the shit out of Regal. Arm-drag by Regal for two, uppercuts by Regal. Bruiser lands a knee and an elbow drop for two, Bruiser stomps on the fingers and lands a lariat for two. Stiff kick to the spine, Bruiser is popular here. Regal kicks back and lands an uppercut, Regal chokes Bruiser on the mat. Regal stretches Bruiser in the middle of the ring, Regal eats a kick to the head. Snap-mare and knee-drop to the eye, Regal is shit-canned to the floor. Regal is pulled into the ring-post,  Regal lands a big uppercut and dropkick onto Bruiser. Regal rakes the face of Bruiser, uppercut by Bruiser. Regal uses his palms to fight off Bruiser, Regal chokes Bruiser with his knee.

 

Eye-poke by Bruiser, senton by Bruiser. Reverse chin-lock, Regal escapes and the action spills to the floor. More kicks and uppercuts, Bruiser wants a suplex into the ring. Regal drops an apron elbow drop, we go back to the ring and start stretching one another. Stiff kick by Bruiser, Regal distracts the referee and murders Bruiser in the nether regions. Two for Regal, Bruiser is up and lands a knee to the back of the head and the forehead. Bruiser sends Regal to the corner, back body drop by Bruiser. Regal lands two stiff shots to the back of the head, Regal smashes Bruiser on the apron. Bruiser lands a shot to the face, Regal is driven into the ring apron. Chops by Bruiser, Bruiser lands a closed fist to the nose of Regal and Regal is spouting blood. Kick to the chest, Regal is bounced off the buckle twice before Regal uses his leg strength to kick Bruiser to the floor. The Blue Bloods come down and kick the shit out of Bruiser for the DQ.

 

Well I did enjoy this one, very brave of WCW to have a match like this and go this long but it was so engaging with both men beating the absolute tar out of one another, they are just throwing hands throughout the match and there is a nastiness present that is sorely missed in other matches in WCW, this felt like two people who hated one another beating the crap out of one another. The finish is definitely a downer but everything else was such a breath of fresh air, it doesn’t even bother me all that much.

 

Winner: Belfast Bruiser over Lord Steven Regal via DQ!

 

Colonel Robert Parker vs Medusa

Medusa ruined Parker’s wedding, Parker wants revenge. Parker locks-up with Medusa and flexes his muscles, Parker is thrown by Medusa. Parker goes for an airplane spin, Medusa counters with a sunset flip. Scoop slam by Medusa, Parker sells the shit out of it. Parker stalls and chokes Medusa and throws her to the mat, Parker misses an elbow. Middle rope dropkick by Medusa, make it two. Medusa lands the German Suplex, Dick Slater pulls out her leg and Parker falls on top! Comedy stuff but enjoyable, not the debut I assumed Medusa would have though, weird.

 

Winner: Parker over Medusa via Shenanigans!

 

(I Quit Wrestling Match) The Booty Man W/ The Booty Girl vs DDP

What happened to Johnny.B Badd and Kimberly? DDP is looking rough and homeless which matches what his character was going through so fair-play for the commitment to his work. However, what the hell is this crap? The Booty Man? Feels like a side character for The Disco Inferno, I do appreciate that we do get an explanation on Johnny B. Badd though. Badd left for the WWF so he lost Kimberly and turned heel in his final performance, what a downgrade for Kimberly having to be with The Booty Man. Must be truly awful as she is not even here with this ridiculous gimmick.

 

Smartly, they stall because nobody wants to see this shit. Booty Man (Can’t believe I am typing this) works the arm, DDP reaches the ropes. Booty Man works the arm, DDP lands a knee in the ropes. Booty Man is shot into the ropes, Booty Man holds onto the ropes and shakes his ass at DDP. Booty Man’s dancing skills are horrific, DDP is outraged with this development and the referee shoves down DDP who is irate. DDP is taking a walk, Booty Man lands big right hands in the aisleway. DDP is rammed into the ring-apron, DDP begs for mercy in the ring. DDP pulls Booty Man into the turnbuckle, elbows and kicks from DDP. Booty Man blocks and rams DDP off the turnbuckle over and over, DDP is on dream street.

 

DDP falls through the ropes, DDP bumps off the ring-post and into the crowd. Kimberly is here, she is wearing Booty Man colours. Kimberly was so gorgeous, Booty Man rams DDP into the guardrail but in the ring, DDP regains control with a side headlock. DDP is shoved off, they avoid one another before DDP struts and gets punched by Booty Man. Big right hands by Booty Man, more posing for the fans. They mess up a spot, not sure what was meant to happen. Ah we see as they repeat the spot, a crossbody miss from Booty Man. Kimberly is on the apron, DDP has spotted Kimberly. DDP chokes Booty Man, DDP points at Kimberly. Reverse chin-lock from DDP, Booty Man fights out but DDP is too strong at this stage of the match and has the reverse chin-lock once more. Booty Man fights out again but same result DDP is in control, Booty Man is hung up on the top rope. DDP asks Kimberly to come up on the apron, DDP kisses her and Kimberly slaps him, Booty Man lands his High Knee for the win.

 

That was horrific, I am not sure Booty Man ever had a good life in his match, I suppose you could say Summerslam 1989 counts but that was mostly about Hogan and Savage. Anyways, this is a massive downgrade from DDP vs Johnny B. Badd. WCW doing a retirement/fired angle for DDP? Let’s see how long it lasts. Horrible match!

 

Winner: Booty Man over DDP via High Knee!

 

(Number One Contender’s Match for The WCW World Heavyweight Championship) The Giant W/ Jimmy Hart vs Loch Ness

A veteran of the UK Wrestling scene, Loch Ness aka Giant Haystacks seems immobile at this point and now this big man not known for his bumping or carrying of other athletes must face The Giant who is as green as grass. This starts with Giant smashing Loch Ness before Loch Ness rakes the eyes and clobbers Giant. Giant elbows Loch Ness and stomps him in the corner. Giant tries a corner splash but misses and spills to the floor, clubbing blow to the throat. Running elbow drop by Loch Ness, Loch Ness misses the second time around. Giant clotheslines Loch Ness, superkick floors Loch Ness. Running Leg drop and it’s over. They did the right thing but that sure did suck!

 

Winner: The Giant over Loch Ness via Running Leg Drop!

 

(Chicago Street Fight Match) The Road Warriors vs Booker T & Sting

The Road Warriors have had problems with Harlem Heat & Sting & Luger so they are looking for some retribution on this night. I also like how a Chicago Street Fight can take place outside of Chicago, possibly the most strong of stipulations. Sting & Animal pair off while Hawk and Booker brawl on the floor, Animal lands ten punches in the corner. They trade partners with Booker T dropping Animal with a Scissors Kick, Hawk and Sting brawl by the entranceway. Animal lands his Powerslam on Booker followed by an elbow drop, Sting rakes Hawk’s eyes on the floor. Animal clubs down Sting and sends him ball-first into turnbuckle, Sting returns the favour. Hawk has to help his partner, where are the weapons?

 

Sting slams Animal, Booker piledrivers Hawk and Hawk no-sells like always. Clothesline on the floor, Animal drills Sting with a clothesline. Booker lands a Harlem Sidekick on Hawk, Sting lands a face-buster on Animal. Booker tries a top rope dive but Animal counters with a fist and a dropkick, Hawk lands a dropkick on Sting on the stage. Animal is coming to the stage, Hawk trades places with Animal. Sting takes a walk and grabs a chair, Booker T has an arm-bar on Hawk before Sting starts cracking Hawk with the chair. Animal is back though and Animal cracks Sting & Booker with the chair. Sting saves Booker from being pinned, Booker cracks Animal with a Harlem Sidekick. Piledriver by Sting on Hawk doesn’t work, why do they keep trying that? Hawk powerbombs Sting and stomps on his dick, Animal chokes Booker with a camera cable.

 

Reverse chin-lock, the four start brawling into the crowd. Hawk starts drilling people with a chair, Sting back-drops Hawk on the floor. Booker jumps off the apron and attacks Animal, kick after kick to the ribs. Sting is in the ring with Hawk, Booker and Animal go to the stage. Diving chop by Sting, Stinger Splash misses and Hawk lands a clothesline, fist drop by Hawk. Doomsday Device is stopped by Booker, Booker is on the top rope. Crossbody on Hawk for two, Sting & Animal collide, Sting lands on Animal’s balls. Hawk plants Booker with a belly to back suplex, Animal lands a low-blow on Sting. Sidewalk slam by Booker, Animal chokes the life out of Booker, Booker lands a low-blow. Hawk gut-wrenches Sting, Booker helps Sting regain control. Double clothesline on Animal, Sting suplexes Hawk onto the top rope, Animal no-sells a suplex from Booker and drills Booker.

 

Sting wanted a Boston crab but Animal just clubs at Sting, Hawk pulls Sting to the floor and they begin to brawl. Booker misses a kick on Animal, Hawk lands a diving clothesline on Booker. Sting and Animal are brawling by the ramp. Booker has a camel clutch on Hawk, Animal and Sting are also in the ring, Sting clamps on a camel clutch on Animal. Hawk boots down Booker, Animal and Sting brawl in the ring, both men hitting big moves before a double clothesline leaves both men down. Hawk & Booker are on the floor, Booker and Hawk are now in the ring. I am losing the will to live reviewing this garbage. Booker snap-mares Hawk, elbow drop misses but Spinaroonie and Booker waffles Hawk with a massive leaping Harlem Sidekick. Animal has a chair and Sting takes it across the back.

 

Sting takes down Animal and waffles him with the chair, Hawk is on the floor and takes out Sting, Hawk takes out Booker with the chair too. Hawk powerslams Booker for a close two, Sting has two brooms and Animal is laid out with brooms. Animal is back up and Sting is waffled in the throat, Animal breaks the broom over Booker’s back. Animal chokes Sting with half of a broom, Booker saves Sting from Animal. Animal & Booker are backstage, Luger is backstage in front of the mirror and Animal is sent into Luger. Luger and Stevie Ray beat the piss out of Animal, Jimmy Hart ties Animal to a pole backstage. Hawk is all alone, Hawk dodges a Harlem Hangover but Stevie Ray clocks Hawk with a chair-shot for the win.

 

Unbelievable shite, I have never seen four people walk around and no-sell shit for so long, it was ridiculous. 29 minutes of stalling for a chairshot at the end, I have never seen such garbage from so many big names. Fuck that.

 

Winners: Booker T & Sting over The Road Warriors via Chair To The Back of The Head!

 

(Doomsday Cage Match) The Alliance to End Hulkamania vs The Mega-Powers

At Superbrawl, Hulk Hogan beat Giant in the cage and held off nine men with one chair, it was one of the worst things I have ever seen. Now, we are going to have those 9 men take on Hogan & Savage. Everything you need to know is there as you can see Arn Anderson in his sweatpants, not even probably dressed for this bullshit. There are three cages, Hogan & Savage must fight through a cage to get to the next cage. Level 1 is Arn Anderson & Ric Flair, Savage goes for Flair, lots of punches and split-screen action which I grew tired of in the previous match but sure let’s see it again with even less visibility because of the giant cages. Chops and punches all around brother, so dangerous they say as nobody is taking a bump on the cage. Anderson sends Hogan into the steel pole in the middle of the cage, Hogan fights back and Anderson takes a bump off the floor. It is interesting to see they have the cage mostly in darkness, how could anyone watch this live in the arena, the spotlights hardly help.

 

Figure four by Anderson on Hogan, Flair does the same on Savage. Flair just passed a weapon down to the other members of The Alliance. Hogan and Savage threw powder in the eyes of Barbarian & Meng, I thought they hard to pin people to eliminate them? No? Flair & Anderson defeated by powder? Hogan punches Taskmaster and Luger with a chain, choking Taskmaster after with it before Luger makes the save. Hogan helps Savage escape from The Faces of Fear, thy are locked out of the cage. Savage & Hogan are after Taskmaster & Luger. 4 men defeated by a combination of powder and a lock, Savage did some move on Luger. Hogan and Taskmaster are on the scaffold, this is a scary sight, could Taskmaster tumble to the floor?

 

Hogan escapes the cage with Sullivan, Sullivan is clocked with the microphone. Big boot by Hogan, Taskmaster is clotheslined into the corner. Savage & Luger are free but so are the other heels, Hogan clotheslines Luger and chokes him with a boot. Hogan slams Luger off the barricade, Sullivan slams Savage into the steel cage. Hogan & Luger are in the ring together, Luger rakes the eyes. Corner clothesline by Hogan, Hogan punches the head of Luger. Taskmaster low-blows Hogan, the heels have regained control.

 

Did The Faces of Fear and Horsemen really just walk away? They really were defeated by powder and a locked door? Luger is cracked in the back with a chair, Luger smacks Savage with the chair and Hogan too. Ultimate Solution & Z Gangster is here, these big muscly men are going to destroy Hulkamania. We are back in the cage, lighting is shocking. Hogan chants here, better than the previous PPV. Ultimate Solution shoves down Hogan. Sullivan is stabbing Savage with a pole through the cage, Savage is up though and Z-Gangsta has been nailed with a double axe handle. Ultimate Solution is rocked by Hogan, Savage cannot knock Z-Gangsta, bearhug by Z-Gangsta. Hogan saves his partner, Z-Gangsta takes him to turn around and Hogan shits himself in fear of his old rival who chokes Hogan.

 

Ultimate Solution slams Savage down gorilla press style while Hogan rakes the eyes of Z-Gangsta to escape the choke. Savage is up high and dives into the bearhug, Savage is tossed to the mat. Wait a minute, Savage has something in his tights that son of a gun. Ric Flair & Arn Anderson are here again, I suppose the rules are very lose in this match. 4 on 2 currently, not sure why Sullivan is not in there. Where is Luger? Hogan and Savage are helped by Booty Man who hands them powder and frying pans, everyone is waffled with frying pans with incredible amounts of hokey phony wrestling. Luger is here with a loaded glove, Luger decks Flair but in a very bizarre manner. It looks like Luger did it on purpose but Hogan still murders him afterwards. Savage pins Flair and this fiasco is over!

 

Horrific, agonizingly lame with limited vision and just garbage all around, unclear rules, lame action throughout and Hogan destroying everyone in sight. Everything that makes WCW lame at this time on full display.

 

Winners: Mega-Powers over Alliance To End Hulkamania via Loaded Glove!

 

That was WCW’s Uncensored 1996, a brave effort from WCW that falls very flat. Why is it brave? Well I find the idea of having all these matches of varying styles go longer than 10 minutes and it works initially, we kick off with Konnan vs Eddie Guerrero, two men who can work that fast-paced lucha style with many moves that blow the minds of the fans in the arena, some awkward parts admittedly with miscommunication present but overall, a good display between the two and naturally Konnan comes off more heelish due to his physique and less flashy style than Guerrero, a possible heel turn could be very good for the big man. Things continue with a stiff match between Finlay & Regal, they just beat the hell out of one another for the longest time but you can feel the hatred behind each blow, it’s heated and physical and I love it, the finish is weak but the two men had me invested throughout the match, something so different from everything else in the company I couldn’t help but love it.

 

Things take a nosedive soon after, I don’t mind a comedy match now and again so I don’t hate Parker vs Medusa but as Medusa is the newer star here, I don’t understand what we are trying to achieve here, there is no Sherri, why is there no Sherri? Why isn’t Sherri putting over Medusa? So many questions here, Booty Man vs DDP is a severe downgrade from DDP vs Johnny B. Badd, Booty Man can’t even look natural dancing, he can’t sell and he is purely living off of Hogan. Loch Ness vs The Giant is a spectacle and goes short but again, why are teasing Hogan could have faced Loch Ness? The man can barely move, it’s embarrassing.

 

The Chicago Street Fight oh boy! The Road Warriors are one of the most disrespected tag teams in the 90s was one of the things I always thought about the duo, looking at how WCW and WWF treated them after the glory years of the 80s but having seen the level they were working at during the 90s, the treatment might have been deserved. These last 2 PPVs I have been horrific watches for me when The Road Warriors have been in the ring because there is a whole lot of nothing going on in that squared circle. It’s like they know it’s going the full 30 minutes so let’s just stink up the joint and they have and they are managing to do it with my boy Sting in there! How is that possible? The often overlooked most popular guy in WCW boring me in matches? Unthinkable yet here we are, I cried out for a break from The Nasty Boys vs Harlem Heat but I think I would take them any day over this joke. The Doomsday Cage is just horrific, the idea that all these heels are being battered by two guys is difficult enough but fans can barely see what is happening, they cannot take any bumps on the cage so it is kicks and punches which is a boring watch and it’s just so convoluted and dumb, it’s bleh. I can’t even articulate how much I hate main event Hogan in WCW when he is half-assing it, I thought Jarrett in TNA was my kryptonite but this my top it, I don’t know if I can take more of this guy. WCW in 1996 needed a coolness and edge and thank God for the NWO because I shudder to think of how wrestling could have been with Hogan doing this shtick for much longer. Avoid this one, thanks for reading and remember: there’s always another night!