Hello and
welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling
review series on the internet that makes your skin crawl more than John Cena
breaking the fourth wall! It’s Backlash 2006, Wrestlemania has ended but we are
far from finished in terms of fallout. John Cena and Triple H continue their
feud with Edge being added to the mix to make a triple threat match for the WWE
Championship. Tag team partners come to blows as Carlito battles Chris Masters
and Kane battles Big Show while we also have Shawn Michaels and God taking on
The Mcmahons and the pay per view debut of the one called Umaga. Backlash
usually delivers more often than not, let’s see what happens tonight!
Opening Promo
Demonic
laughter with Vince talking about The Mcmahons kicking HBK’s ass. Highlights
from Wrestlemania, etc. We now move onto less ridiculous promos with a hype
package for a main event. The Game wants his championship, Edge wants to prove
he is not a fluke, Cena wants to remain on top of the mountain.
Chris Masters vs Carlito
This had
been simmering from quite some time, Carlito initially had asked Masters to be
his partner inside the elimination chamber for New Year’s Revolution. The two
proved quite the team before Carlito eliminated Masters, dumped him out of The
Rumble and made Masters look like a moron. Carlito was gaining more fan support
night after night, this led to Carlito’s face turn and we have the match
between the two. The two have a stare-down, lots of finger-pointing and insults.
Masters
decks Carlito, Carlito is choked with his own shirt. Low dropkick and
facebuster by Carlito, Masters is up quickly. Right hands by Carlito, back drop
by Masters. Two for Masters, clubbing blow by Masters. Carlito escapes a
military press and applies a Masterlock. Masters breaks free, Masters is
lowbridged by Carlito. Plancha by Carlito, stomps and right hands by Carlito.
Right hands by Carlito, Masters stomps Carlito and looks for a powerbomb.
Turnbuckle Powerbomb by Masters, two for Masters. Masters chokes Carlito with a
knee, leg across the back by Masters. Huge leg drop for two, Masters drags
Carlito by the hair. Neck vice by Masters, Carlito breaks free before eating a
reverse elbow for two.
Another rest
hold by Masters, neckbreaker by Masters. Eye rake by Carlito, clothesline by
Masters. Mounted punches by Masters, snake eyes with Masters calling for his
finish. Carlito slips out of the masterlock for a cradle, two for Carlito.
Springboard elbow by Carlito, Carlito has his apple. Masters watches the apple
in the air, low dropkick by Carlito. Right hands, clotheslines by Carlito.
Carlito counters a neckbreaker for a dropkick, two. Irish whip by Masters to
the corner, Carlito is placed on the top rope. Carlito knocks off Masters,
moonsault by Carlito for two. Masters tries hard for a Masterlock, Carlito
sends Masters into the top turnbuckle. Backstabber and with his feet on the
ropes, Carlito steals the win.
Strong Eddie
vibes from Carlito in this match, might be a bit too similar at times after
Eddie’s recent passing but this company had no problem exploiting Eddie’s death
so I should be happy this is in a positive manner. I have enjoyed Carlito’s
work since his debut, the babyface stuff is coming along slowly and he is going
through some growing pains. Masters has been interesting enough although I have
seen him in singles action with only HBK so the test comes for when Masters is
in there with people who are not as good as HBK. For now, it was solid and a
decent opening match.
Winner:
Carlito over Chris Masters via Backstabber!
Maria & Lita
Maria
surveys the audience about who will win the WWE Championship, Lita interrupts
while Maria calls Lita a whore. Lita promises that Edge will walk out champion,
basic stuff.
Umaga W/ Armando Alejandro Estrada vs Ric Flair
Umaga was
Rikishi’s brother who portrayed Jamal in Three-Minute Warning, Jamal had been
wrestling in All Japan as part of Ro&D alongside the likes of Taka
Michinoku, Taiyo Kea and D’Lo Brown. If you were wondering, there were the top
heel stable that Kawada, Kojima and Mutoh would beat the piss out of. Anyways,
Umaga is Vince’s new monster, he debuted and destroyed Flair. Flair has a
chance at revenge tonight.
Umaga
attacks Flair on the ramp, Umaga destroys Flair with punches. Eye poke by
Flair, low blow behind the referee’s back. Right hands by Flair, another low
blow and chops by Flair. Umaga shakes it off with a huge right, corner
clothesline. Flair avoids a hip attack, chops by Flair. Umaga runs into the
ringpost, more chops by Flair. Chop block by Flair, make it three and Umaga is
down. Umaga kicks off Flair for a figure four, Umaga puts Flair in the tree of
woe. Flying headbutt by Umaga, hip attack by Umaga. Diving Headbutt by Umaga
and Umaga finishes off Flair with a Samoan Spike.
Strong
showing from Umaga, Flair gives it the razzle dazzle but Umaga is far too
strong. Excellent showcase for Umaga with Flair being a great babyface to get
over the huge monster. Future looks bright for the first two winners in tonight’s
matches, Raw would be interesting for the next few months.
Winner:
Umaga over Ric Flair via Samoan Spike!
The Mcmahons
Vince talks
shit about God, Shane looks at Vince like Vince just ate a child in front of
his very eyes. Vince pours out Shane’s water and walks across water like God,
Vince talks Fish and bread and breaks the bread in a symbolic gesture like God.
This was painfully unfunny, Vince holds a Mackarel and exclaims Holy Mackarel.
Shane sips from his water that is now wine. Yeah, painful stuff.
(WWE Women’s Championship Match) Trish Stratus vs Mickie
James ©
The best
women’s storyline in WWE up to this point with the obsessed stalker Mickie
James confronting her idol Trish Stratus and defeating her for the championship
at Wrestlemania. Trish looks to win back the championship from the crazy Mickie
James, Mickie’s character work was phenomenal at Mania, I expect more goodness
from this match.
Mickie is
cautious in her approach with Trish being confident this time around, the mind
games have turned and Trish is in control. Lock-up, armwringer by Mickie. Trish
counters and sweeps the leg for two, Trish smiles as Mickie looks off her game.
Trish blows Mickie a kiss, Matrix spot into a headscissors, clotheslines and
dropkick by Trish. Trish measures for a Chick Kick, Mickie dodges but eats a
boot from Trish. Lou Thesz Press off the apron, right hands by Trish for two.
Forearms by Trish, corner splash by Trish. Trish loos for ten punches, Mickie
sends Trish to the floor and we have a problem as Trish’s arm bends under her
body, the challenger is seriously hurt. Mickie covers with the referee giving
the dreaded X simple. Mickie is disqualified after an awkward minute or two.
Such a
shame, I was into the start of this match. Trish was playing head games with
Mickie, Mickie had been completely put off her game. It was going to be
interesting to see how Mickie would try to escape with her championship.
Winner:
Trish Stratus over Mickie James via DQ!
Maria Interviews HBK
HBK cuts a
promo about kicking The Mcmahon’s ass.
(WWE Intercontinental Championship Match/ Money In The Bank
Briefcase Match)
Following
Wrestlemania, Benjamin engaged in a war of words with RVD, RVD walked away the
winner at Wrestlemania with the briefcase while Benjamin had beaten Ric Flair
for the Intercontinental Championship. The two collide tonight with the winner
leaving with both championship and briefcase.
Benjamin
takes down RVD, slapping the head of RVD. Armwringer from Benjamin, RVD takes
the arm. Benjamin armdrags out, posing for the fans again. Knee by Benjamin,
side headlock. Shoulder block by Benjamin, RVD takes down Benjamin with his
legs, deep armdrags. Benjamin wants a break, RVD clotheslines Benjamin down.
Benjamin stalls for time on the floor, lock-up and clubbing blows by Benjamin.
Right hands by Benjamin, RVD floats over and nails Benjamin with a spinning
heel kick. Scoop slam, Benjamin avoids a rolling thunder. Plancha by RVD, RVD is on the apron but Benjamin leaps over RVD
for a sunset flip powerbomb to the floor. Two for Benjamin, Benjamin drives his
knee into the backs of RVD. Reverse chinlock by Benjamin, RVD wriggles free but
it slammed down by his ponytail.
Knee lift by
Benjamin for two, backbreaker by Benjamin. Clubbing blows by Benjamin, camel
clutch by Benjamin. RVD reaches the ropes, scoop slams by Benjamin. RVD escapes
another chinlock, RVD counters a rolling thunder for a Samoan drop, two for
Benjamin. Benjamin has RVD on the top rope, RVD batters off Benjamin. Benjamin
leaps up to the top rope and superplexes RVD, two for Benjamin. Rear-naked
choke with a bodyscissors, RVD breaks free and Benjamin misses a dropkick as
RVD holds onto the ropes. Kick to the head by RVD, clotheslines by RVD.
Superkick floors Benjamin, springboard diving kick. Spinning wheel kick and
Rolling Thunder, two for RVD. Slam by RVD, split-legged moonsault for two.
Shoulder thrusts by RVD, Benjamin flips out of
the monkey flip. Step-through spinning heel kick by RVD, Benjamin dodges the
frog splash. DDT by Benjamin, two for Benjamin. RVD rolls to the floor and drop
toeholds Benjamin into the barricade, Benjamin grabs the briefcase. Huge kick
to the head, Benjamin is on the top rope. Diving crossbody, RVD rolls through
for two. Dragon Whip misses, hurricanrana by RVD. Benjamin elbows RVD into the
referee, RVD nails Benjamin with the briefcase. Five Star Frog Splash and RVD
is your new champion.
Very good
match, they were given more time due to Trish’s injury and they use it
perfectly. Benjamin had transitioned into an over-confident heel with Mama
being a great asset to his character, disappointed that she did not make a
difference while the company were finally rectifying the mistakes they had made
back in 2002 when they did not go with RVD despite his popularity and the way
he moved the merchandise brother! This was good stuff, a highlight for both.
Winner: RVD
over Shelton Benjamin via Five Star Frog Splash!
Kane vs The Big Show
Kane had
snapped, hearing voices in his head that would constantly say May 19th.
What did it mean? Why was Kane snapping? Big Show stood up to his partner and
now they come to blows over Kane’s new attitude. Kane cheap shots Show, Show
counters with a gorilla press slam. Headbutt by Show, huge chest chops. Show
whips Kane to the corner, Kane boots Show and goes after the injured eye of
Show. Show goes for the hand of Kane, Kane’s hand is smacked off the turnbuckle.
Show smacks around Kane on the floor, Kane sends Show into the steel steps.
Show enters the ring with Kane stomping
Show, more arm work from Kane before a huge clothesline for two.
Show slams Kane, Show misses an elbow drop.
Keylock from Kane, Show shakes off Kane. Boot by Kane, Kane climbs to the top
rope. Show blocks the clothesline for a fallaway slam. Clothesline by Show, hip
splash and shoulder block by Show. Kane counters the chokeslam for a DDT, two
for Kane. Show catches Kane for a powerslam, two for Show. Show looks to claw
out Kane’s eye, Kane eye pokes Show. Kane boots Show to the floor, the arena
turns red with a voice saying the word May 19th. Kane writhes around
on the mat with Show looking on confused, Show has a steel chair. Show waffles
Kane with the chair, Show looks on regretful.
No ringbell,
no nothing? Ok, we will assume that Kane won by DQ. Yeah, it is sluggish and
slow, what can you expect from these two titans. It does not have that
physicality or intensity you need to pull off the match and the finish was
beyond weak, did not help either guy. A real blight on this card that seems to
be at least interesting up onto this point.
Winner:
Kane over Big Show via DQ!
The Mcmahons vs Shawn Michaels & God
Vince blamed
his loss at Wrestlemania on Michaels having a partner in God, it was pretty
funny stuff when you think about it with Mcmahon blaming a loss in wrestling
due to God. Anyways, some people were offended by Mcmahon and his mockery of
religion, Vince would film religious skits and use quotes familiar with the
bible and the holy spirit. It was all a bit much despite the entertaining
aspect of Vince being an utter nutcase.
Vince grabs
a microphone and introduces God, a spotlight is shown with Vince changing God’s
music to Somebody Call Your Momma. Vince dances to God’s theme, this is
insanity. HBK slaps Vince and Shane is pummelled by Michaels. Back drop, right
hands and a plancha onto Vince. Shane is clotheslined to the floor, plancha by
Michaels. Shane and Michaels brawl to the stage, knees and lefts by Shane.
Shane tries a piledriver, Michaels back drops Shane on the stage. HBK chops
down an oncoming Vince, Shane is bounced off the stage. Michaels crossbodies
himself and Vince off the stage through some equipment at the side of the
stage. Michaels climbs up to the stage and is waffled by a chair shot by Shane.
Shane checks on Vince, Vince emerges from the wreckage.
Shane is
battering Michaels down the ramp, Michaels is bleeding. Michaels meets the
barricade and ringpost, Shane jabs Michaels. Back suplex, Shane misses his big
elbow drop. Michaels and Shane brawl, DDT by Shane. Vince tags in, Vince pulls
off his belt and whips Michaels like a dog. Vince uses the belt to flatten
Michaels, Vince has a trash can. Michaels is waffled, Vince asks for the
microphone. Vince screams about God, asks about God leaving the building. Vince
misses sweet chin music, right hands by HBK. Shane is down, flying forearm by
HBK, Shane cracks Vince with a chair by accident. Michaels hammers Shane,
flying forearm and kip-up.
Inverted atomic
drop followed by right hands and a scoop slam. Elbow drop by Michaels, the
crowd has come alive for HBK. Sweet Chin Music to both Mcmahons, Michaels
screams Suck It which is another subtle hint for what is to come. Michaels
looks for a table, Michaels finds two tables. Shane and Vince are laid on the
tables, Michaels has a ladder. Michaels climbs the ladder but The Spirit Squad
appear, Michaels dives onto Mcmahon’s goons. HBK battles but is overwhelmed by
the number’s game. The Spirit Squad lift up Michaels after a beating and send
HBK through a table. The Mcmahons steal the win, HBK and God lose.
The feud
could have ended at Wrestlemania, it had a fitting end with HBK destroying Vince
but it continued, they could not recapture the magic of the first time, it is
very rarely that anyone can top the original. Michaels being the awesome
wrestler that he is, tries his best to make an entertaining match out of this
fiasco but it just does not come off, it is nowhere near the level of the
Wrestlemania match.
Winners:
The Mcmahons over Shawn Michaels via Shenanigans!
John Cena Promo/ Matt Striker Segment
Todd Grisham
interviews Cena, Cena cuts a solid promo about the main event. Trish Stratus
has dislocated her shoulder but here comes some filler in the form of Matt
Striker. Eugene insults and humiliates Striker, fine stuff.
(WWE Championship Match) John Cena © vs Triple H vs Edge
Cena had
been crowned the man at Wrestlemania with Triple H tapping to the STFU. The
match was average at best with Cena not exactly shining in there with The Game,
Edge comes out the next night after his show-stealing match declaring to be
number one contender. Top quality promo package for the match, gets you in the
mood for the match.
Edge rolls
to the floor, Cena and Triple H brawl. Shoulder block by Cena, fisherman suplex
for two. Inverted atomic drop by The Game, right hands by Triple H. High knee,
Edge breaks up the count. Cena and Triple H brawl with Edge watching on from
the apron, both Triple H and Cena notice Edge on the apron. Edge is yanked in
the ring, Edge is pinballed around before being clotheslined to the floor. Edge
is bounced off the announce table by both Cena and Triple H, Triple H attacks
Cena from behind and throws Cena to the floor. Edge lures in The Game and pulls
Triple H into the bottom turnbuckle. Edge stomps on Triple H, Cena pulls down
Triple H. Cena nails a splash on Edge for two, spinning side slam by the
champion.
Lita lowbridges Cena, knee facebuster by
Triple H. Clothesline, cover and two for Triple H. Spinebuster by Triple H to
cut off Edge’s comeback, Edge slips out of a suplex and nails an Edge O Matic
for two. Sleeper by Triple H, Edge escapes and applies a sleeper to Triple H.
Cena was looking for a double FU, Edge slips out and Spears both men. Edge
catapults Triple H into the ringpost, Triple H has donned the crimson mask. Edge
has Triple H on the announce table, Edgecution on the table. Edge dropkicks
Cena in the ring for two, Edge stomps Cena in the corner. Edge Spears Cena in
the corner, Edge tries another spear but Cena clamps on an STFU. Edge is so
close to tapping, Triple H prevents Edge from tapping and smacks Cena with a
microphone.
Triple H has a chair, Edge is walloped into
the crowd. Cena drop toeholds Triple H for an STFU, Triple H begins to fade as
Cena applies more pressure. Triple H does not fade though, Triple H survives.
FU is avoided by Triple H, Cena slips out of the pedigree for another STFU.
Edge appears on the top rope, Cena is knocked into the referee. Cena hooks Edge
for a super FU, Triple H joins in for a tower of doom spot. Lita has a chair,
Triple H spinebusters Lita. Triple H does not want the chair, Triple H is going
for the sledgehammer. Edge Spears Triple H, Cena has Edge for an FU. Triple H
lows blows Cena, Edge is on the floor. Cena counters a Pedigree for a jacknife
roll-up. After the match, Triple H lays out both men to stand tall.
Good main
event, I liked the beginning with Edge being the coward and the other two going
toe to toe before realizing Hey, wait this guy is making a fool out of us. Match
had some really dramatic transitions too with Cena applying the STFU out of
nowhere and Cena’s Pedigree counters. They all worked well with one another,
there was no denying the chemistry they had with one another. Only gripe is
Triple H standing tall, makes no sense in the grand scheme of things, your next
program is RVD and Cena with Edge being an annoyance in the background, you are
building to RVD’s showdown with Cena. No need for Triple H to lay out both with
the sledgehammer, no need for Triple H to look tough after his loss, he will be
a babyface with Michaels in a matter of weeks. That being said, it a very good
main event with a rabid crowd who were all in on the match, everyone looked
good and it was another good match for Cena as champion, those had been few and
far between during the last few months.
Winner:
John Cena over Everyone Else via Roll-Up!
That was WWE’s
Backlash 2006, a good show from the Raw brand but nothing spectacular. When I
saw the line-up, I thought this show could be something special but I was
disappointed once we hit Trish vs Mickie. What happened was out of their
control but I was looking forward to that match and when you are served Big Show
vs Kane, it is enough to kill anyone’s enthusiasm. Michaels vs The Mcmahons was
a bit much for me as I said before, Mcmahon’s character was a nutcase at the
time but it bordered on cringe and embarrassing as a wrestling fan, I would
like to forget most of the match. Carlito was good with Masters though, RVD and
Shelton had a good match showing off what they could do given the time and you
had a fun main event. Overall, the good outweighed the bad but there was some forgettable
stuff on this show. Thans for reading and remember: There’s always another
night!
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