Sunday 3 September 2017

TNA Final Resolution 2006 Review

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Hello and welcome to another fourth-wall breaking edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that has a worse reputation that Sexy Star! I know, it’s been a while. A long time since I have looked at TNA, I got so caught up in WWE with Cena at the helm and the fall of WCW, it led to some neglect on Jarrett’s promotion. Well, have no fear as I return with TNA’s Final Resolution 2006. The big talking point of this night is that Sting is back! Sting is in Christian Cage’s corner to battle Monty Brown and Jeff Jarrett. We also have Team 3D and AMW slugging it out for the tag team championships and Raven continues to be tested by the ghosts of his past. Will it kick ass? Let’s find out!

Opening Promo

Brown and Jarrett talk shit about Sting, Sting is too old. Sting will be destroyed by Jarrett and Brown, we get glimpses of Sting. You have babyfaces like Sabin, Styles, Dutt and Christian talking about The Icon Sting.

Austin Aries/Alex Shelley/Roderick Strong vs Matt Bentley/Sonjay Dutt/Chris Sabin

ROH stars Strong and Aries are in the corner of Shelley while we have the backbone of the X Division in Sabin, Dutt and Bentley who surprises me with his popularity. This is going to be your fast-paced flippy-insane match. Shelley and Sabin start, Shelley rake Sabin. Sabin leapfrogs Shelley, kick to the face. Arm drag, snapmare and dropkick to the back of the head. Sabin tags Dutt, tag team moonsault for two. Shelley bites Dutt, tag to Strong. Armdrag by Dutt, make it two. Armbar from Dutt, tag to Bentley.

Rights by Bentley, more arm drags from Bentley. Strong stomps on Bentley’s toes, Aries is in the match. Aries is pounded by the heels, exploder suplex by Bentley for two. Tag to Dutt, Aries elevates Dutt to the apron. Dutt looks for the sprinkler, Strong crotches Dutt. Triple team neckbreaker/double stomp combination for two. Dave Hebnar is in the crowd for some reason, butterfly suplex by Strong for two. Tag to Aries, back rake from Aries. Back suplex for two, Dutt eats kicks to the ribs. Strong throws Dutt to the floor, Strong stomps Dutt and here comes Jerry Lynn watching the match. Sick Kick by Strong, slingshot hilo by Shelley. Rings of Saturn from Shelley, kick to the head by Shelley. Tag to Strong, Dutt is lifted into the air and smacked to the ground.

Strong forearms Dutt down, DDT by Dutt. Sabin gets the tag, superkick for Shelley. Hurricanrana, boot in the corner. Shelley is in the tree of woe, baseball dropkicks. Aries is tripped into Shelley, Sabin nails a spinning DDT on Strong. Enzuigiri for Shelley, Shelley escapes the cradle shock. Enzuigiri again by Sabin, Bentley nails an elbow drop for two. Backbreaker by Strong on Bentley, Dutt nails Strong with an Asai DDT. Aries pushes Dutt off the top rope, Sabin pushes Aries to the floor. Sabin nails Aries with a suicide dive, Shelley and Bentley square off.

Complete shot by Bentley, Strong Sick Kicks Bentley. Traci Brooks argues with Strong, Bentley Superkicks Strong to save Traci but out of nowhere, comes Shelley with a roll-up and a handful of tights, Shelley sneaks out of the ring after victory is assured.

Decent match, not the fast-paced madness I expected from these six, it was tame for them when you think about the whole thing. It was your standard TNA X Division match though, it is hard to even call it anything different as I am sure I have seen this type of match hundreds of times while covering these TNA pay per views.

Winners: Team Shelley over Team Sabin via Handful of Tights!

Diamonds In The Rough W/ Simon Diamond vs The James Gang

The appeal of this match is The New Age Outlaws are finally back together after months and months of teasing. BG James and Kip James joined forces as Konnan kicked the two out of The 3-Live Kru. Konnan had distrusted Kip from the beginning but Kip had proved to be good and not rotten like Konnan has assumed. So, we have The Diamonds in The Rough as cannon-fodder. Skipper shoulder blocks and keylocks BG, side headlock and another shoulder block. Knee by Skipper, BG ducks and nails his jabs. Knee drop for two, Skipper bridges out of the cover and we have a tag to Kip James.

Young and Kip lock-up, clean break from Kip. Side headlock by Kip, shoulder block and neither man go down. Young eats a kick to the head and a right hand, Japanese arm drag by Kip. BG clotheslines Skipper and Young to the floor while Diamond screams encouragement at the two. Skipper and Young bang heads, Diamond distracts Kip. Skipper misses his cue (Yes, the streak lives) and BG waffles Skipper which leads to a spinebuster from Young.

Snapmare and kick by Skipper, Skipper talks trash before covering for two. Tag to Young, drop toehold and dropkick combination for two. Scoop slam, Young misses a moonsault. Tag to Kip James, right hands all around. Powerslam to Young, Diamond is decked by Kip. Kip misses a stinger splash, slingshot clothesline by Skipper for two. Young throws BG to the floor, Skipper looks for the play of the day, Kip James counters for The One and Only, The James Gang win.

Crowd was dead once the match started, BG sells his ass off like usual which is a plus but this match meant nothing. It was just there to fill time, I cannot say much more about it, I am struggling for words. This is such a slow start to a TNA pay per view, I am not used to this kind of thing.

Winners: The James Gang over The Diamonds in The Rough via One & Only!

Hiroshi Tanahashi vs AJ Styles

Sweet Jesus, it is Hiroshi Tanahashi. The Ace of The Universe, the man who would lift NJPW out of the slum that Inokism put the company in, there are few better than this man. Tanahashi had been building his reputation in NJPW and also in Noah after facing the likes of Kobashi and Takeshi Rikio.

Anyways, enough of me orgasming over Tanahashi, this should be awesome. Lock-up, armwringer but Styles has a hammerlock. Mule kick and armdrag by Tanahashi, Styles arm drags back. Fujiwara armbar by Tanahashi, elbows by Styles. Dropkick from Styles, Tanahashi avoids a tope with Styles taunting in the ring. Tanahashi takes a breather, war of elbows and chops with Styles slamming Tanahashi. Knee drop for two, elbows by Tanahashi and a huge German suplex. Shoulder block and sentons for two, abdominal stretch by Tanahashi. Sleeper by Tanahashi, transition into the Dragon Sleeper. Styles is swung around before a swing using The Dragon Sleeper into a final cut. Two for Tanahashi, scoop slam by Tanahashi. Styles dodges an elbow, enzuigiri from Styles.

Clotheslines by Styles, Tanahashi ducks a clothesline and places Styles on the apron. Styles counters for a Phenomenal Forearm, suplex into a neckbreaker for two by Styles. Tanahashi boots away Styles, Styles elbows Tanahashi. Tanahashi has Styles for a huge full-nelson slam, two for Tanahashi. Tanahashi has a sleeper, enzuigiri and slingblade by Tanahashi. Two for Tanahashi, Tanahashi places Styles on the top rope. Headbutts by Tanahashi, Styles floats over on the back suplex. Both men crash with a thud, Styles blocks the dragon suplex. Shannon Moore hits Tanahashi with the plaque. Styles knocks out Moore with a kick and Styles wins with a Styles Clash.

Bullshit, Styles’ body language at the end of the match says it all. That was such a garbage end, Tanahashi was such a huge star even at that time and a clean win for Styles would do great things even when Styles had already accomplished so much in his TNA career. You could also have had Tanahashi go over Styles and make more of Tanahashi in TNA but that was the worst decision they could have made with Shannon Moore. Shannon fucking Moore’s feud is more important than a clean finish to Styles and Tanahashi? Fuck right off!

Winner: AJ Styles over Hiroshi Tanahashi via Styles Clash!

Raven vs Sean Waltman

One of the more engrossing storylines in TNA at the time, Raven won the world championship. Zbyszko was not happy with the rebel Raven as champion, Raven lost the championship under dubious circumstances, Zbyszko as commissioner did not allow Raven a rematch. Zbyszko continues to screw Raven by bringing up ghosts from Raven’s past, this is do or die for Raven as Raven will be fired if he loses this match. Waltman comes out which is funny as these two had battle before on pay per view when Jeff Hardy no showed a pay per view and Waltman was announced as the replacement. Waltman also had a feud with Jerry Lynn cut short, no idea why though.

Waltman cracks Raven with a trash can as Raven was distracted by Zbyszko, kendo stick shots by Waltman. Raven decks Waltman with a trash can lid, both men end up on the floor as Zbyszko talks trash to Raven. Raven is bleeding, no surprise there. Waltman topes onto Raven and Zbyszko’s security, Waltman rams Raven with a shopping trolley. Raven wallops Waltman with a trash can lid and pushes Waltman off the stage in the trolley. Raven grabs a table and a ladder, Raven clotheslines the referee by mistake. Even Flow DDT but there is no referee, Zbyszko comes in as referee. Ten punches by Raven, low blow by Waltman and an X-Factor. Two for Waltman, Raven is whipped with a belt.

Dave Hebnar is watching the match, Waltman misses the bronco buster. Zbyszko counts two for Raven, very slowly. Raven sets up a table and ladder, Raven drags Waltman up the ladder. Zbyszko distracts Raven, low blow by Waltman and an X-Factor off the ladder through a table. Zbyszko counts the three despite Raven’s foot on the rope, Raven loses the match.

Fun angle, the action in the ring not so much. Typical garbage style match from Raven, Raven gets colour seconds into the match. Waltman does not add much to the match, the fun comes with Zbyszko’s officiating. The finish is a little difficult to swallow too with there being no DQ throughout the match as weapons were allowed which means there would be no such thing as a rope break. How can there be rope breaks in a match with no rules?

Winner: Sean Waltman over Raven via Shenanigans!

Ron The Truth Killings Promo/ Raven leaves!

 Ron is interrupted by Konnan who is leading LAX, I guess Bobby Roode is not important at the minute. Zbyszko makes fun of Raven who is leaving the arena, Jackie Gayda is here. Gayda has massive breasts, I have no idea what this is about. That was weird, I assume Gayda was fired in storyline and we will see something happen soon enough.

Bobby Roode W/ Scott D’Amore vs Ron The Truth Killings

Killings had embarrassed Roode on two occasions, Roode wants revenge. Always felt that Killings was wasted in The 3-Live Kru, roll-up attempt by Killings for two. O’Connor roll for two, Roode powders to regain his composure. Drop toehold but Roode counters for a hammerlock. Side headlock by Killings, pin for two. Roode tries a backslide, side headlock by Roode. Sunset flip by Killings for two, multiple pin attempts by both for two. Roode thins about leaving, tope con hilo by Killings. Roode gains control as Killings is distracted by D’Amore which leads to Roode slamming Killings into the ringpost.

Roode beats down Killings in the ring, abdominal stretch by Roode. Roode uses D’Amore for leverage, roll-up by Killings for two. Knee by Roode for two, waistlock by Roode. Roode whips Killings to the corner, boot by Killings. Missile dropkick, Killings comes back with the Lie Detector. Roode is pushed into the corner, leg lariat by Killings. Two for Killings, Roode front suplexes Killings off the middle rope. Crossbody with Killings rolling through for two, Konnan is here. Killings spots Konnan, Roode nails his Lariat and this match is over.

It was fine, Team Canada had run its course in many ways. There was nothing more they could do, they have fought everyone, done every despicable act and lowered themselves to comedy when the time was right. The act was no longer fresh and the storyline of conflict between The 3-Live Kru was old months ago, we just have Killings as conflicted instead of BG James. Also, it is hilarious to think LAX originally had Apolo as a member.

Winner: Bobby Roode over Ron Killings via Lariat!

James Mitchell Promo

Mitchell owns the hell out of this promo calling Rhino out of his depth and unfocused due to his divorce and his daughter. Abyss is coming to town and it looks like it is curtains for The Man-Beast Rhino.

Rhino vs Abyss

Rhino had been fucked around mostly since joining TNA, Rhino had been champion for a cup of coffee and ran over by The Jarrett Train. Rhino is now fighting for the love of his family and his precious little daughter, Abyss was hired by Team Canada to take care of Rhino. The appeal of this match is Rhino is a tough bastard and might be nasty enough to wipe out Abyss.

Rhino runs down and pummels Abyss, the two trade blows. More rights by Rhino, clothesline by Rhino. Rhino clotheslines Abyss to the floor, plancha by Rhino. Abyss brawls back into the match, chairs. Rhino is cracked across the back, Rhino snapmares and dropkicks Abyss for two. Hard Irish whip by Abyss, Abyss wedges a chair in the middle rope. Rhino is sent head first into the chair, foot choke by Abyss. Neck vice by Abyss, Rhino fights out and nails a massive TKO. Corner spear and chair shot by Rhino, Abyss staggers around the ring.

Another chair shot, Rhino sets up for The Gore. Mitchell distracts Rhino, Abyss hits Rhino with a chain behind the referee’s back. Two for Abyss, Doomsday screams Mitchell. Spinebuster by Rhino for two, Rhino wants a Rhino Driver. Mitchell saves Abyss again, Rhino blocks a chokeslam with a low blow but Abyss nails The Black Hole Slam on the steel chairs.

Why did Abyss need to use the chain behind the referee’s back if there is constant interference and steel chair shots? No idea, it was mostly an average match. Neither man is known for lighting up the ring with their wrestling, this match reflects that statement.

Winner: Abyss over Rhino via Black Hole Slam!

Team 3D Promo

Bubba talks about great tag teams while putting over the fact that they have never been NWA tag team champions. D-Von puts a little sizzle on the steak at the end, best promo of the night so far.

(TNA/NWA Tag Team Championship Match) AMW © W/ Gail Kim vs Team 3D

AMW had laid out Team 3D when they came to TNA, Team 3D gained a measure of revenge when they defeated the champions in a tornado tag table match but this time, the championships are on the line. Lock-up with Devon and Storm, clean break. Storm takes the back, Devon takes down Storm. Side headlock by Storm, shoulder block by Storm. Devon nails a hiptoss and a dropkick, Storm and Devon have a stand-off. Harris cheap shots Devon, tag to Harris. Devon nails a double clothesline, Ray is in the match. Hiptoss, scoop slam and elbows, right hands to the head of Harris for two. Flying clothesline by Harris for two, lock-up with Ray pushing back Harris.

Both trade chops, Ray misses a middle rope senton. Storm comes in, clothesline and knee across the throat. Storm chokes Ray with his wristtape, tag to Harris. Ray elevates Harris to the floor, right hand to Storm. Tag to Devon, spinning elbow and neckbreaker for two. Spinebuster by Devon for two, Ray slams Storm. What’s Up Headbutt on Storm, Team 3D have a table but Storm tries a baseball slide. Storm is taken out by a table to the face, Harris nails the baseball slide though. Storm wants a powerbomb through the table, Ray saves Devon. Harris chokes Devon in the ring, tag to Storm who nails a knee drop and applies a reverse chinlock. Tag to Harris, Harris misses a corner spear while Devon takes down Storm.

 Tag to Ray, hiptoss and back body drop for the champions. Double clothesline and sidewalk slam for two, Ray is clubbed in the back by Storm. Harris nails Storm by mistake, DDT for two as Storm saves the titles. Harris suplexes Devon, Hart Attack by AMW on Ray for two. Double suplex on Devon, Devon recovers to stop a Death Sentence on Ray. Harris and Devon battle on the top rope, Ray clubs Harris. Dudley Doomsday Device for two, Ray throws Storm to the floor.

Storm has a chair, Harris is calling for Storm. Storm hits Harris by mistake, Reverse 3D for two. Storm Superkicks Devon, Ray pummels Storm. Storm kicks off Ray, Ray shoves Storm off the top rope through a table. Roll-up by Ray for two, Gail Kim is in the ring. Ray knocks the powder into the referee’s eyes, Gail’s eyes and Harris’s eyes. 3D and Team 3D win the match. Team Canada attack Team 3D and place Harris on Ray, the referee could not see and declare  AMW the champions.

That would have been a clever finish if Team 3D did not have their music play when they won or the fact that the announcers and the ring announcer saw Team 3D win the match. I am all for suspending my beliefs while watching wrestling but you are telling me that the ring announcer could not tell the referee who won the match? I was not a fan of all the false-finishes too, seems way too much like the main event scene in TNA and it does my nut in when TNA tries to make every match seem like a Wrestlemania calibre match. Finally, Bubba looks awful in a t shirt and jeans, might be at his heaviest here and it’s kind of a disgrace to be in that shape when you are trying to prove the WWE wrong.

Winners AMW over Team 3D via Shenanigans!

(TNA X-Division Championship Match) Samoa Joe © vs Christopher Daniels

This match was born out of a terrible face turn for Daniels, Daniels and Joe competed in an eight-man tag match which they won, Joe beat the piss out of cocky heel Daniels and instead of evoking sympathy, the place erupted which Daniels felt would happen and warned management against the move. Anyways, Daniels is back for revenge and out to win the championship.

Daniels dodges Joe to begin, Joe begins throwing kicks which Daniels dodges. Forearms before Joe uses knees to slow Daniels. Forearm by Daniels, high knee in the corner, Joe eats uppercuts and shots to the ribs. Arm drags, tilt-a-whirl headscissors. Hurricanrana and Joe is down, Joe dodges a leg lariat. Huge kicks from Joe, Joe chops Daniels in the corner. Daniels tries rolls-up for two, Joe catches Daniel for a surfboard style armbar. Daniels reaches the ropes, Daniels misses a springboard moonsault. Boot by Joe, Daniels is stomped in the corner. Chop, kick and knee drop combination for two, Joe continues to kick the back out of Daniels. More chops in the corner, Daniels tries forearms and dropkicks but Joe still stands. Powerslam by Joe, Daniels catches an oncoming Joe with a huge facebreaker.

STO by Daniels, split-legged moonsault for two. Joe is placed on the top rope, Daniels drops Joe with a death valley driver for two.  Joe powerbombs Daniels for two, Daniels takes down Joe before being caught in a triangle choke. Joe transitions to an STF, Daniels reaches the ropes. Joe goes for ten punches, Daniels wants a powerbomb but Joe nails a hurricanrana and delivers a sickening lariat for two. Uranage by Daniels, BME for two. Joe rolls to the floor, Joe blocks a split-legged moonsault. Daniels kicks Joe’s head off, slingshot elbow drop by Daniels. Daniels tries re-entering the ring but Joe boots Daniel to the floor. Daniels is placed on a chair at ringside, huge boot by Joe.

Daniels is bleeding, Joe elbows the shit out of that cut. AJ Styles has seen enough, motivating his friend Styles. Joe pounds away on Daniels, Daniels slaps back. Angel’s Wing attempt, huge enzuigiri by Joe. Knee in the corner, Joe has the set-up. Muscle Buster by Joe, Daniels reaches the rope before the Coquina Clutch. Joe has the chair, Joe wants a Muscle Buster on the chair. Joe plants Daniels, no DQ? Joe kicks Daniels in the head over and over, huge knees to the head. Styles throws in the towel, Styles saves Daniels from certain injury.

Now, that delivered. That is the first time I have said that about this pay per view, I liked the heart of Daniels throwing everything at Joe but Joe being too strong and systematically destroying The Fallen Angel. Daniels was tortured by Joe and Styles had to save his friend by throwing in the towel. Was not a huge fan of the Muscle Buster on the chair, that should have been a DQ, the refereeing on this show has been poor. However, that finish was great with Joe laying in those knees, Daniels sold it perfectly. Do not know where they are going as these guys have had a triple threat before, who will dethrone Joe? Either way, I am looking forward to all of it.

Winner: Samoa Joe over Christopher Daniels via TKO!

Monty Brown & Jeff Jarrett vs Christian Cage & Sting

It is all about Sting, Christian came to TNA and talked about winning the championship. Thought we were going there but we have a slight detour with Sting coming in which should have popped a huge rating I am sure for those in TNA.

Brown shoulder blocks Christian, Christian applies a roll-up for two. Brown clubs down Christian, tag to Double J. Jarrett whips Christian, Christian mocks Jarrett and drop toeholds Double J. Christian tags Sting, side headlock and shoulder block by Sting. Hiptoss by Sting and a dropkick, Jarrett powders. Brown talks strategy with the champion, the crowd chants you still got it at Sting. Jarrett pounds away at Sting, Sting is bounced off the turnbuckle. Sting facebusters Jarrett, Brown comes in for his own facebuster. Christian splashes Brown and Jarrett, ten punches by Christian. Gail Kim distracts the referee, Jarrett low blows Christian and Christian is tossed to the floor. Gail Kim nails Christian with a hurricanrana off the apron, Brown drops Christian on the guard rail.

Christian eats a backbreaker and a t-bone suplex, two for Brown. Tag to Jarrett, Jarrett misses big time but Brown punches down Christian. Front chancery by Jarrett, Brown distracts the referee so Sting’s tag is not seen. Brown and Jarrett drop Christian across the top rope, suplex by Christian for two. Brown has Christian on the apron, Christian bites off Brown. Frog Splash by Christian, Christian gets two and Jarrett pulls Sting off the apron. Christian looks for the tag and nobody is home, Brown throws down Christian. Jarrett has two chairs, they look for a conchairto. Christian DDTs both Brown and Jarrett. Hot-tag to Sting, Sting pounds everything in sight. Stinger Splashe for Jarrett, Brown clotheslines the referee by mistake.

Sting has Jarrett for The Scorpion Death Lock, Jarrett taps in the middle of the ring. Christian keeps away Brown before Brown slams Christian into Sting. Sting and Christian have words, Brown has the championship. Christian saves Sting from the championship, Brown is sent to the floor. Christian and Sting have words, Jarrett is on the top rope. Sting crotches Jarrett, Brown’s head is rammed into Jarrett’s balls. Team Canada are ringside, Sting and Christian lay out Team Canada. Christian dives onto Brown, Jarrett has the championship and Sting is waffled in the face. 1…….2……..Sting kicks out at two and a half!

Jarrett looks on in shock, Brown throws Christian in the ring. Sting is stomped by the two, Brown pummels Christian. Sting begins to shake off Jarrett’s punches, Sting throws bombs. Both miss splashes, Jarrett has his guitar but Sting has his bat. Sting destroys the guitar, Brown is on the floor. Bat to the ribs and a huge Scorpion Death Drop, Sting and Christian win the match.

Entertaining tag team match, much more drama here than the tag team championship match which is understandable, those in the main event would not want to be overshadowed by the champions. Sting was mad over, crazy to think that after 5 years since the death of WCW, Sting would still be as beloved. Very good tag team match with a classic feel, Jarrett could be great when he wanted to be in the ring. Not too much spotlight stealing, he knew that Sting was the man and Sting was allowed to do his thing, a good end to an otherwise poor night.

Winners: Sting & Christian over Brown & Jarrett via Scorpion Death Drop!

That was TNA’s Final Resolution of 2006, one of the poorer TNA shows I have had to review for this website. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder but it does not apply to this show sadly. I just found myself bored by most of the show or horribly disappointed, the likes of the X-Division opener, Raven’s match and the New Age Outlaws reunion had me thinking it is all so similar to everything I have seen from TNA. Raven being busted open is not new or using weapons, the story has me hooked though. How many times can I watch an X- Division multi-man match and pick them apart? They are all so similar, BG and Kip have wrestled the same match for years, they have it down to a tee.

Abyss and Rhino was disappointing for such a promising match, they are two big bears going at it, it should be stiff in all the right ways but it was so flat. Tanahashi and Styles could have been special yet I am watching Shannon Moore steal a plaque from Styles which upset Styles so much that it looks lie even he tried to distance himself from that trash by getting involved in the Joe vs Daniels storyline. Joe vs Daniels was great story-telling and Sting’s return was a hell of a lot of fun but this show was a tough sit-through at times with no life to a lot of the matches. Thanks for reading and remember: There’s always another night!

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