WWE Royal Rumble 2007 Review

Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that wanted Jay White in The Bullet Club! What a shocker we have for you tonight as I review WWE’s Royal Rumble 2007, the first of the big four for 2007. The card includes Batista defending his world heavyweight championship against Mr. Kennedy fresh off a feud with Undertaker, we also have John Cena defending his WWE championship against Umaga and even the ECW Championship will be defended as Bobby Lashley battles Test. You cannot forget the royal rumble match with the winner going to Wrestlemania to challenge for his respective brand’s pay per view. Royal Rumbles rarely disappoint but could 2007 be different? Let’s find out!

Opening Promo

A subdued package if I am honest, they hype the rumble and the main event matches but it just does not have that grandioso feel to it for me.

The Hardy Boyz vs MNM W/ Melina

Look at this, another match between these teams. We have seen them touch at Survivor Series, December to Dismember, Armageddon and now the Royal Rumble. Talk about getting the most out of a match, happy to see The Hardys together and I am glad that Mercury was used to the best of his abilities but something new would be nice.

Nitro and Matt begin the match, tag to Mercury as Nitro jumped Matt. Munted punches by Mercury, Matt is meant to have a dislocated jaw per storyline assault from MNM. Tag to Nitro, shots to the jaw. Matt fights back, forearms to the face of Nitro. Nitro smacks the gut of Matt, tag to Mercury. Mercury misses a right hand, clubbing blows by Matt. Tag to Jeff, slingshot dropkick for two. Mercury backs Jeff to the corner, tag to Nitro. Right hands by Nitro, inverted atomic drop and leg drop to the groin by Jeff for two. Fist drop/splash combination by The Hardys, neckbreaker by Matt for two. Nitro gains control, tag to Mercury.

Tag to Nitro, uppercuts and a middle rope choke. Boot from the apron by Mercury, Nitro covers for two. Cravate lock by Nitro, knees to the jaw by Nitro. Tag to Mercury, big slaps by Mercury. Reverse chinlock by Mercury, Matt fights back before a hairpull from Mercury. Mercury misses a middle rope splash, tag to Jeff. Jeff nails forearms and a sit-out suplex on Nitro for two, whisper in the wind from Jeff. Mercury saves Nitro, Matt pummels Mercury with a back suplex. Double suplex on Nitro, Omega splash by The Hardys but Jeff is smacked in the ribs with knees by Nitro, Matt connects with the leg drop but Jeff is the legal man. Tag to Mercury, stomp to the ribs. Two for Mercury, Mercury brings Jeff to the corner. Right hands before a tag to Nitro, running knee by Nitro.

Leg drop by Mercury for two, waistlock from Mercury. Jeff tries a cradle for two, Mercury pounds away on Jeff. Double gutbuster by MNM, Matt saves Jeff. Kicks by Nitro, rear naked choke by Nitro. Jeff escapes but Nitro grabs a front chancery, Jeff back drops Nitro off but Mercury distracts the referee and the referee misses the tag. MNM double team Jeff, face rake using the ropes. Jeff nails Nitro with a reverse mule kick, tag to Matt. Back drop to Nitro, elbow to Mercury. Corner clothesline and bulldog combination for two on Nitro, middle rope elbow to the back of the head of Nitro for two. Jeff stops Nitro from nailing snapshot, Poetry in Motion on Mercury. Nitro dodges poetry in motion, roll-up on Matt for two. Side Effect on Nitro, Twist of Fate on Nitro. Mercury tackles Matt to the floor but Jeff tags in and nails a Swanton Bomb for the win.

Good opening match from these two, they have been facing off for months so I am glad to see the rivalry finally come to an end although it was rather one-sided with The Hardys beating the crap out of MNM on every occasion. However, I did enjoy the series and it was the best match out of all that they had, good start to the show.

Winners: The Hardy Boyz over MNM via Swanton Bomb!

(ECW World Championship Match) Bobby Lashley © vs Test

Oh why does the lord wish pain on my soul? After the awful ECW pay per view, we have Test challenging Bobby Lashley. Lashley was the champion after defeating Big Show in that chamber match that we shall not speak of again, Lashley has his first challenger in Test.

Lock-up, Test has Lashley in the corner. Slap by Test, takedown from Lashley. Test reaches for the ropes and we have the escape, Test sends Lashley into the ropes. Test chokes Lashley using the middle rope, elbows and foot choke from Test. Lashley catches Test for an exploder suplex, stalling vertical suplex by Lashley. Test rolls to the floor, Lashley is caught open on the apron. Test sends Lashley into the ringpost, armlock from Test. Lashley escapes before Test goes back to the arm, Lashley back drops Test. Corner spear by Lashley, Lashley botches a military press but covers well showing his arm is hurt. Big Boot by Test for two, Test screams and harasses the referee. Lashley escapes a tko attempt, clothesline by Lashley. Test rolls to the floor, says fuck it and gets counted out.

What kind of logic is that? The heel challenger decides he does not want the championship and loses by countout? What kind of bizarre booking is that? What the hell were they trying to accomplish? Why would Test ever have an opportunity at the championship again? Why did Lashley lay out Test at the end? How does this help Lashley? This was pointless, a waste of ten minutes but when you think of how they used ECW, it almost seems fitting. DUD!

Winner: Bobby Lashley over Test via Count-Out!

(WWE World Heavyweight Championship Match) Batista © vs Mr. Kennedy

Batista became champion after finally beating King Booker after a series of average matches, Kennedy had a victory over Batista via DQ. Kennedy was a rising star on Smackdown, coming off a feud with The Undertaker and the wheels were in motion for Taker vs Batista at Mania but this should still be a good match considering the two personalities inside of the ring.

Lock-up, Batista throws down Kennedy multiple times. Batista has Kennedy in the corner, Kennedy smacks around Batista after a clean break. Elbows by Kennedy, boot by Batista. Suplex for two, Batista rams Kennedy into the barricade. Kennedy comes back by sending Batista foot first into the steel steps, Batista is hobbling. Shoulder thrusts by Batista in the corner, Kennedy dropkicks the knee of Batista. Lots of leg work from Kennedy, Indian deathlock from Kennedy. Kennedy uses the ropes for leverage, the referee catches Kennedy.

Knee trembler from Kennedy for two, Boston crab by Kennedy. Batista kicks off Kennedy, small package for two. Running powerslam is blocked by Kennedy, chop block by the challenger. Batista nails a desperate spinebuster, right hands by Batista. Kennedy nails the knee, a kick to the face wakes up Batista. Clotheslines, corner clothesline and a slam. Rolling firemen’s carry, Batista calls for the end. Kennedy pushes Batista into the referee, low blow and neckbreaker but there is no referee. Short DDT by Kennedy for two, boot from the corner by Kennedy. Kennedy dives into a clothesline, Batista Bomb on one leg and that’s all she wrote.

Solid championship match, Kennedy worked the leg throughout the whole match and Batista sold the match very well. Another good match in the books for Kennedy, you could see why the company was so high on the character and the persona. Kennedy had a charisma, the fans wanted the championship reign but based on this performance, they would not have to wait long before Kennedy’s day. Well, until fate interfered and screwed all that up but this may be Kennedy’s finest moment inside of a WWE ring.

Winner: Batista over Kennedy via Batista Bomb!

(WWE Championship Match) John Cena © vs Umaga (Last Man Standing Match)

John Cena had beaten Umaga at New Year’s Revolution, it was a shock to me as I expected that Umaga would become wreckless and get disqualified which would lead to this match. I was wrong as Umaga was rolled-up by Cena, Umaga is back for revenge and Cena is not 100%. Cena’s ribs are taped up, Cena is walking gingerly while Umaga cannot wait for the bell to ring. We saw very good selling in the last championship match, can Cena match Batista’s performance?

Cena pummels Umaga before Umaga goes to the ribs, Cena is on the defence now. Cena is hurled into the steel steps, headbutt by Umaga. More rib punches, shoulder thrusts by Umaga. Clothesline by Umaga, Umaga brings steel steps into the ring. Cena hotshots Umaga, Cena picks up the steel steps and hurls them at Umaga’s head. The referee begins counting, Umaga is up at six. Cena is on the attack, Umaga is in the ring. Spinning heel kick by Umaga, bearhug by Umaga. Belly to belly suplex by Umaga, Umaga has steel steps in the ring once more. Umaga has the steps in the corner, Cena is placed against the steel steps. Umaga motions for the running hip attack, Cena dodges the attack. Umaga is clocked with the steel steps, Cena tries a crossbody but Umaga counters for a massive side slam.

Umaga hip drops Cena, Cena blocks the third drop with his knees, throwback onto the steel steps. Spinning side slam onto the steel steps, Five Knuckle Shuffle by Cena. Cena tries an FU but Umaga is too heavy, Cena’s back cannot carry the weight and Cena cracks himself off the steel steps. Cena is bleeding, right hands by Umaga. Foot choke by Umaga, right hands by Umaga. Cena wants more, Cena is still standing. Right hands by Cena, Samoan drop by Umaga. Cena blocks the Samoan spike but cannot block the headbutt, Cena is in the tree of woe. Cena avoids a headbutt and nails an awesome Kobashi style leg drop on Umaga.

Umaga is sent into the ringpost, Cena knocks down Estrada. Cena has a TV monitor, Umaga is walloped with the monitor. Cena and Umaga brawl on the floor, Umaga smacks Cena off the steel steps. Cena is laid on the announce table, Umaga takes a run and leaps at Cena. Cena dodges at the last second, Umaga stands at nine. Estrada unhooks the top turnbuckle, Estrada wants Umaga to use the turnbuckle and its steel rod. Cena counters for an FU, right hand to Estrada, Umaga is smacked with the steel rod and Cena applies an STFU using the rope to choke out Umaga.

Great championship match, Cena showed so much fire in this match. I would have liked to seen more rib work and more selling from Cena himself but taking that out of the criticism, the match is a tonne of fun. Lots of moving around, the next spot builds and is bigger and better than the next with table bumps, fun with the steel steps and a hard fought battle on the part of Cena. Umaga plays the monster so well inside of the ring, it was a very fitting championship match for a big event like the royal rumble.

Winner: John Cena over Umaga via Not Answering The Count!

30 Man Royal Rumble Match

You know how it works by now, if you are still reading and don’t know how a rumble works, you must be insane. Thirty men with one opportunity to go to Wrestlemania and headline for the championship of their respective brand. Rules are simple: two men enter with entrants coming into the ring at timed intervals, eliminations occur over the top rope with both feet touching the floor. I will split this into sections so it is easy for all of you to follow.

Entrants 1 to 5

Flair is in at number one, Finlay at number two. Shoulder block by Finlay, right hands by Finlay. Chops by Flair, back drop by Finlay. Number three is Kenny Dykstra, Flair chops Kenny. The heels gang up on Flair, double stomps in the corner. Number four is Matt Hardy, Side Effect on Kenny. Number five is Edge, Edge sprints down and Spears Flair and Finlay. Matt dodges, Twist of Fate on Edge. Flair rolls out and grabs a chair. Edge tosses out Flair and Kenny in quick succession.

Kenny/Flair Have Been Eliminated!

Entrants 6 to 10

Number six is Dreamer, Dreamer low dropkicks Edge before Finlay takes down Dreamer. Matt almost eliminates Edge, number seven is Sabu. Sabu pulls out a table, Sabu DDTs Dreamer. Number eight is Gregory Helms, Helms restarts his feud with Matt. Stomps by Helms, Sabu almost throws out Finlay but Finlay hangs onto the bottom rope. Dreamer and Edge square off in the corner, Sabu blocks being tossed by Finlay. Number nine is Shelton Benjamin, Benjamin almost tosses Dreamer. Same deal with Matt, Finlay and Benjamin tease tossing one another. Number ten is Kane, things are going to change very quickly. Boot for Dreamer, right hands for anybody who is in Kane’s way. Powerslam for Helms, Chokeslam for Edge. Dreamer is tossed to the floor, Kane Chokeslams Sabu through the table for the elimination.

Sabu/Dreamer Have Been Eliminated!

Entrants 11 to 15

Number eleven is CM Punk, Punk rushes Edge. Finlay and Punk brawl, number twelve is King Booker. Booker tosses Helms within seconds.

Helms Has Been Eliminated!

Punk and Booker try to eliminate one another, number thirteen is Super Crazy. Number fourteen is Jeff Hardy, The Hardys double team those in their way. The Hardys run into Kane, Poetry in Motion on Kane. Number fifteen is The Sandman, things are going to get extreme. Kendo stick shots for anyone in the way, Booker has enough of that jazz and tosses Sandman in seconds.

The Sandman Has Been Eliminated!

Entrants 16 to 20

Entrant number sixteen is Randy Orton, right hands to Super Crazy, Rated RKO toss Super Crazy. Rated RKO team up again and out go The Hardy Boyz.

The Hardy Boyz Have Been Eliminated!

Number seventeen is Chris Benoit, chops for everyone. German suplexes for Finlay, Benjamin has Punk on the apron. Punk survives barely, more German suplexes as Benoit kills everyone. Number eighteen is RVD, kicks galore as RVD pummels everything in sight. King Booker is tossed out by Kane, Booker is distraught. Booker re-enters and Scissor Kicks Kane before eliminating Kane.

Kane/King Booker Have Been Eliminated!

Number eighteen is Viscera, RVD punches Finlay. Number twenty is Nitro, Viscera smacks Punk in the corner. Rated RKO double team Nitro, Benoit stomps Benjamin.

Entrants 21 to 25

Number twenty-one is Kevin Thorn, RVD dropkicks Nitro into Viscera. Multiple clotheslines but Viscera will not go down. Number twenty-two is Hardcore Holly, the ring is filling up with plenty of superstars. Everyone ganging up on Viscera, number twenty-three is Shawn Michaels. Lou Thesz Press on Finlay, clothesline and Finlay is eliminated. Sweet Chin Music which allows everyone to toss Viscera over the top rope. Benjamin is elevated to the floor by HBK.

Benjamin/Viscera/Finlay Have Been Eliminated!

Number twenty-four is Chris Masters, Rated RKO attack Michaels. Benoit sends Nitro tumbling to the floor, Masters works on Punk in the corner.

Nitro Has Been Eliminated!

Number twenty five is Chavo Guerrero, Benoit pulls out Kevin Thorn with nobody watching.

Thorn Has Been Eliminated!

Entrants 26 to 30

Twenty-six is MVP, MVP goes after Benoit. Masters and RVD do battle, Masters tries a back suplex but RVD leaps out of the suplex and dropkicks Masters out of the rumble.

Masters Has Been Eliminated!

Orton and Punk are battling close to the ringpost, Punk survives elimination. Carlito is number twenty-seven, Rated RKO pummel Carlito. Number twenty-eight is The Great Khali, Khali beats up everyone with superior power. Number twenty-nine is Miz, Holly is tossed to the floor as is Benoit and Miz and RVD. Punk is tossed out too, Carlito is slapped out. Khali throws Chavo out too, Khali poses dominantly.

Benoit/Holly/Miz/RVD/Chavo/Carlito/Punk Have Been Eliminated!

Khali Slam on Michaels, number thirty is The Undertaker. Taker and Khali brawl, right hands by The Deadman. Brain chops by Khali, Taker staggers but does not go down. More brawling, Khali eats haymakers from Taker. Khali is against the ropes, Khali is clotheslined out of the match. Old School on MVP, Taker tosses MVP.

MVP/Great Khali Have Been Eliminated!

Orton clatters Taker with a steel chair, Edge thought about spearing Orton. Orton caught Edge, Orton is not happy. RKO on Michaels, Michaels falls to the floor. Orton and Edge have words, Rated RKO pummel Undertaker. Taker will not stay down though, more blows reign down on Taker. Corner clotheslines by Taker who is mounting a comeback, chokeslam is blocked via gut kick. Double clothesline by Taker, snake eyes on Edge. Massive boot, Edge Spears Taker who wanted a chokeslam on Orton. Chair to the head of Taker, Edge wants a conchairto. Michaels saves Taker by throwing out Orton and nailing Edge with Sweet Chin Music. We are down to two, Michaels and Taker.

Rated RKO Have Been Eliminated!

Taker sits up, Michaels kips-up. A stare-down for the ages, right hands by HBK. Taker shoves off Michaels to survive, right hands by Taker in the corner. Michaels hangs on by the skin of his teeth, chops by HBK. Michaels does his flip in the corner, Taker headbutts Michaels. Taker misses a boot, both men almost spill out, huge forearm by Michaels. Taker blocks with an elbow, right hands by Taker. Neckbreaker by HBK, slugfest between the two. Boot by Taker, Taker lifts Michaels to the apron. Michaels is resilient as ever, HBK is on the top rope.

Taker wants to toss HBK to the floor, Michaels is not staying down. Taker hits the mat with a thud, Michaels pulls his all into his elbow drop. Michaels wants sweet chin music, Taker blocks that for a Chokeslam. Undertaker eats a Sweet Chin Music as the tombstone is countered, Michaels measures for one more kick. Michaels misses as Taker dumps Michaels to the floor, Taker is going to Wrestlemania!

Winner: Undertaker over Everyone Else via Survival!

I might be alone in this opinion but I really found this rumble rather boring, there were no surprises which are some of the most fun parts of these kind of matches but there were also no memorable moments throughout the match. Rumbles allow for interactions that are not normally possible due to brand restrictions but I felt that there was nothing here, it was just everyone fighting and not doing a lot when it came to making the match fun.

However, that finishing stretch with the battle between Taker and Michaels was great, so much tension and so much drama. Just the two of them battling out made the match so important, they tore the house down in the time that they shared alone in that ring. Taker and Michaels were easily the stars of the match, they came into the match late though which means I sat through a whole lot of nothing just to get that nugget of gold at the end and as good as the match was, I cannot say the rumble itself was overly entertaining or exciting.

That was WWE’s Royal Rumble 2007, a mostly good pay per view from the WWE. It is very hard to make a Royal Rumble boring, it is the second biggest show in the WWE calendar. They want to deliver, it is the road to Wrestlemania. This show delivered, I only felt let down by bizarre booking in the ECW championship match and the rather boring Royal Rumble. The opening tag match was fast-paced with The Hardys doing what they do best, Jeff has been a sensation and such a shot of electricity and fresh air since his return from TNA, The Hardys are money and the fans still love them after all this time.

The Raw & Smackdown championship matches were really good stuff, Kennedy is such an unlikable heel even with all his charisma, Kennedy works the leg throughout the match, Batista sells and works for that finish and when it comes, it is impactful as Batista drives Kennedy through the mat. Even better when it comes to Cena vs Umaga, Umaga works the ribs and dominates while Cena battles from underneath, Cena and Umaga have a super fun match with all the steel steps shenanigans and announce table stuff before we have Cena resorting to choking out the monster just to win, I think it would have been so much more impactful had Cena not beaten Umaga by pin-fall at the prior pay per view, you could have even got another month out of this by having Cena finally pin Umaga but what’s done is done, no need to dwell on it.

My only gripes were that awful ECW title match and the rumble itself. The rumble did not feel like the rumbles we have come to known, no real titanic battles or points of interest. A lot of people you could have done without, I know they wanted to represent ECW but beyond RVD and Punk, every ECW roster member in the match was bounced around like a joke. They were just filler, things felt big when HBK and Taker came in but that was well into the twenties of the match. The match had been on a long time before that and the ECW championship finish made no sense to me, no idea why the challenger would walk away from a championship match. Bizarre and pointless, Lashley beat up Test afterwards so why could Lashley not just pin Test? Thanks for reading and remember: There’s always another night!

 

ECW December To Dismember 2006 Review

Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that blows as much as this pay per view! Fuck my luck, it’s time for ECW’s December To Dismember 2006. Where do we even begin with this? There was one ECW pay per view after the brand was revived, you are about to learn why there was only one pay per view for ECW. The main event is an extreme elimination chamber match featuring the top stars of ECW and the opening match features The Hardys vs MNM. These were the only two matches announced before the show, that’s an issue. But they will pad out the card right? Right? Oh you already know let’s get this on the road!

The Hardy Boyz vs MNM W/ Melina

MNM are back, Mercury comes back and all was forgiven apparently as they further the feud between Jeff Hardy and Johnny Nitro. The first match features zero ECW talent, that is not a good sign. It is almost like saying here are the real stars guys, do not mind the regulars.

Mercury and Matt start, lock-up with clean break. Side headlock takedown by Matt, shoulder block by Matt. Hiptoss by Matt, stand-off with everyone in the ring. Arm-wringer from Mercury, Matt reverses for a hammerlock and tag to Jeff. Knee drop on the arm by Jeff, tag to Matt. Elbow by Mercury, Nitro tags in and eats a hiptoss. Arm-wringer by Matt, tag to Jeff. Slingshot dropkick by Jeff for two, tag to Matt for a back elbow. Nice wheelbarrow slam to Mercury, Hardys rule the ring. Tag to Jeff, Nitro counters a jawbreaker with a shot low on Jeff, tag to Mercury. Back elbow for two, tag to Nitro. Neckbreaker by Nitro, Nitro misses a standing shooting star press. Tag to Matt, elbows by Matt.

Splash Mountain powerbomb by Matt with Mercury saving Nitro. Melina grabs Matt’s foot, Matt is distracted and Mercury clotheslines Matt. Double gutbuster by MNM, corner knee by Nitro. Two for Nitro, Melina chokes Matt with a headscissors. Cheap shot to Jeff, sit-out slam by MNM. Two for Mercury tag to Nitro. Matt dodges a double suplex for a double neckbreaker, Jeff is knocked off the apron. Poetry in motion by MNM, Matt avoids the extreme combination. Mercury’s head meets Nitro’s sack, tag to Jeff. Flying forearms by Jeff, inverted atomic drop and leg drop to the groin. Nitro saves Mercury, sit-out suplex by Jeff. Matt and Mercury brawl, Matt clotheslines Mercury to the floor. Plancha by Matt, Nitro suicide dives onto both with Jeff jumping on everyone with a crossbody.

Poetry In Motion, Twist of Fate but Nitro pulls out Mercury from a Swanton Bomb. Springboard dropkick by Nitro for two, double catapult by MNM. Mercury is legal, surfboard stretch from Mercury. Tag to Nitro, double sledge into the corner by MNM. Hip hop leg drop by Nitro, Jeff fights back but is thrown to the floor. Melina slaps Jeff as Mercury tags in, double leg drop by MNM for two. Backbreaker and slingshot elbow drop by MNM, Matt saves Jeff. Jeff tries a sunset flip, Mercury attacks Jeff. Reverse chinlock by Mercury, Jeff fights out pushing Mercury to the floor with an O Connor roll. Mercury attacks Matt to stop the tag, Nitro stomps Jeff behind the referee’s back.

Jeff blocks the catapult to the corner and nails a Whisper in The Wind, tag to Matt. Double clothesline, right hands all around. Clothesline and bulldog combination, Side Effect on MNM. Nitro survives, scoop slam by Matt. Middle rope leg drop for two, The Hardys setup for their turnbuckle powerbomb finish but Mercury wipes out Matt and Nitro nails a hurricanrana on Jeff for two. Double stereo superplexes by The Hardys, Melina is on the apron. Nitro dropkicks Melina by mistake, roll-up by Jeff for two. MNM nail Snapshot on Jeff, Matt saves Jeff. Mercury throws Matt to the floor, Jeff is placed on the top rope. Super Snapshot is denied, Matt nails a double Twist of Fate. Mercury is placed on Nitro, Swanton Bomb by Jeff and The Hardys win the match.

Twenty-two minutes of action, the match basically reset in the middle so it made for a tough watch, they were clearly trying to fill as much time as possible. Also, poor Melina almost ended up being injured taking her one bump. Action was solid, there was still so much potential to The Hardys which WWE would capitalize on in the near future. Fine night for everyone involved but far too long.

Winners: The Hardy Boyz over MNM via Swanton Bomb!

RVD Promo

Very serious promo from RVD about the seriousness of the elimination chamber match, RVD is the clear favourite for the match.

Matt Striker vs Balls Mahoney

Oh my goodness, Striker has his face on his ass. Lovely close-ups of Striker’s ass, that is what this pay per view needs. Basically, Striker wants no weapons, no foul language and no cheating, Mahoney obliges for this very friendly wrestling match. Hiptoss and cross armbreaker by Balls, Striker makes it to the ropes. Mahoney runs shoulder first into the ringpost, Striker begins working the arm. Dropping his full weight on the arm, elbows to the arm by Striker.

Roll-up by Mahoney for two, Striker nails a cutter using Mahoney’s arm to drag down Mahoney. Two for Striker, more arm work from Striker. Irish whip to the corner, boot by Mahoney. Punches by Mahoney, Fujiwara armbar from Striker. Mahoney rolls through but Striker maintains control until a sidewalk slam, Mahoney is on the top rope and Striker crotches Mahoney. Roll-through into a Fujiwara armbar, Mahoney reaches the ropes. Right hands by Mahoney, back body drop. Jabs by Mahoney, big right. Striker eats a sit-out spinebuster and this match is over.

Oh boy, it would be a match that was fine for a house show or a regular episode of ECW. It is not exactly a huge feud or something that meant anything in the grand scheme of things. It was just there, it was ok.

Winner: Balls Mahoney over Matt Striker via Spinebuster!

Sabu is Attacked!

Sabu is out of the main event as Sabu has been attacked and unresponsive backstage. Fans scream bullshit, this I not looking good.

The FBI W/ Trinity vs Elijah Burke & Sylvester Terkay

Trinity did well for herself to go from TNA to WWE, do not know how long it lasted but is flat-out a squash match. Guido and Mamaluke are lambs to the slaughter for Burke and Terkay, Guido trips Burke and paintbrushes the youngster. Tag to Mamaluke, side headlock takedown. Double hiptoss and elbow by The FBI, Mamaluke is back in from a quick tag from Guido. Knee by Burke and here comes Terkay, knees by Terkay. Terkay misses a Stinger splash, Guido tags into the match. Terkay catches Guido to stop a crossbody, Terkay dumps Guido onto Mamaluke. Tag to Burke, reverse chinlock.

Guido fights back, elbows to the ribs. Terkay headbutts Guido for two, Burke tags Terkay. Massive kick by Terkay, tag to Burke. Elijah Express, STO with Mamaluke saving the match. Reverse chinlock, tag to Mamaluke. Dropkicks by Mamaluke, flying chop. Terkay eats a double low dropkick to the knees and face, double flapjack. Burke kicks out, Terkay pulls out Guido. Terkay forearms Mamaluke, Elijah Experience and the match is over.

Mercifully, it was over I must say with the crowd being as silent as a funeral. Nobody believed FBI had a chance, when nobody cares the match dies a slow death. I would argue that this went far too long, I don’t think FBI should have had any offense on the hot new act but they needed to stretch it out somehow, it is dragging really bad by this point and I am not even near the main event.

Winners: Burke & Terkay over FBI via Elijah Experience!

Daivari W/ Great Khali vs Tommy Dreamer

The big matches just keep coming, Khali and Daivari are back I have not seen the two since Great American Bash where The Punjabi Prison match was no longer featuring Great Khali. Daivari attacks Dreamer after a distraction from Khali, hiptoss by Dreamer. Eye rake and dropkick by Daivari, baseball slide by Daivari. Dreamer whips Daivari into the barricade, suplex by Dreamer. Khali lowbridges Dreamer, the referee sends Khali out of the arena. Daivari regains his composure and applies a reverse chinlock. Dreamer is yanked to the mat by his hair, elbows by Daivari for two. Dreamer fights back before another sleeper, Dreamer shakes off Daivari by dropping his weight back crushing Daivari.

Dreamer nails right hands, back body drop by Dreamer. Scoop slam into an inverted DDT for two, Daivari rakes the eyes to avoid a dreamer driver. Dreamer meets Daivari on the middle rope, Daivari shoves off Dreamer. Dreamer ducks the crossbody, Daivari is in the tree of woe. Low dropkick from Dreamer, Daivari rolls-up Dreamer with a handful of tights for the win. Afterwards, Khali decimates Dreamer on the ramp.

Who cares I mean in all honesty who cares at this point in the night? Nobody wants to see this kind of stuff on pay per view, it is as basic as you can get. It is almost insulting that they thought they could get away with putting this kind of trash on pay per view. Kind of reminds me of classic ECW as I continue to sift through the company’s pay per views.

Winner: Daivari over Tommy Dreamer via Roll-Up!

Hardcore Holly Is In And Sabu Is Out!

Holly is in the match, Holly grins like a prick at this announcement.

Mike Knox & Kelly Kelly vs Kevin Thorn & Ariel

CM Punk dodged a huge bullet my friends! Kelly was smitten with Punk giving a shout-out and wishing Punk the best of luck in the main event. Knox being Kelly’s boyfriend is understandably pissed but they have this match against a fellow heel in Kevin Thorn. So three heels and one babyface in Kelly Kelly who should not be in the ring like anywhere near it at all. Knox and Thorn feel one another out, arm-wringer is broken by Thorn. Right hand by Thorn, Polish hammer from Thorn. Knees to the back, forearms to the face. Knox yanks Thorn down by the hair, massive motherfucking lariat from Knox. Eye poke by Thorn, short-arm clothesline.

Right hands and scoop slam by Knox for two, Thorn blocks a corner clothesline but eats a boot for two. Ariel continues to scream and be the most annoying thing on the planet, Knox has a front chancery. Ariel tags in which means Kelly must tag into the match. Ariel kicks down Kelly, choke using the ropes by Ariel. Forearms by Ariel, foot choke in the corner. Kelly dodges a corner splash but is smacked in the back, elbow drop by Ariel. Kelly wants the tag but Knox abandons Kelly who had been courting CM Punk, she had it coming to be honest with you. STO for the win.

The screaming was enough to kill this for me, nevermind all the terrible wrestling, the flat crowd and lack of skill and technical ability on display from everyone in this match. The best part is The Sandman coming in at the very end to cane the shit out of Thorn.

Winners: Thorn & Ariel over Kelly Kelly & Knox via STO!

(ECW Heavyweight Championship Extreme Elimination Chamber Match) The Big Show © vs Test vs Hardcore Holly vs Bobby Lashley vs CM Punk vs Rob Van Dam

Finally, we are at the main event with an extreme elimination chamber to decide who is the man in the land of extreme. Big Show had been dominant since the brand’s inception as RVD lost the championship to Show due to being arrested for possession of substances that RVD should not have held. So, we have six of the best on ECW, Holly and RVD start. Right hands by RVD, RVD is whipped to the floor. RVD eats a hotshot from Holly, RVD kicks Holly square in the face. RVD jumps from the turnbuckle, Holly ducks but RVD lands on the wall like Spiderman. However, RVD misses a splash and takes himself down landing on the ropes. Holly sends RVD into the wall, scoop slam on the floor. Holly is on the top turnbuckle, Holly tries a splash but RVD blocks with a boot. Rolling Thunder to the floor by RVD, Holly suplexes RVD into the ring.

Two for Holly, RVD low dropkicks Holly. Holly nails his own dropkick for two, the first pod opens and CM Punk is in the match. Chair to the head of Holly, springboard clothesline to RVD. RVD throws a chair back at Punk, RVD monkey flips Punk onto the chair. RVD eats a leg drop onto the chair from Punk, springboard dropkick by Punk to Holly. Punk wedges a chair in the corner, RVD is bleeding. Punk sends RVD into the chair, vile kick by Punk. Punk tries a hurricanrana on Holly, Holly counters sending Punk into the wall. Sidewalk slam by Holly on Punk, two for Holly. Holly wants a superplex on Punk, Holly connects.

RVD covers for two, Punk nails Holly with his high knee. RVD boots Punk in the face, Test is the second man in the match. Crowbar to the ribs of Punk, RVD’s face is raked at by Test. Punk is choked with the crowbar, Punk hotshots Test to derail his momentum. RVD clotheslines and superkicks Holly, Test is waffled with the chair. Running dropkick to Punk, Five Star Frog Splash on Punk and that’s all for Punk. Test measures RVD for a Big Boot but nails Holly, Holly is gone.

Punk/Holly Have Been Eliminated!

RVD nails Test with a diving thrust kick, RVD climbs to the pod of Big Show. Show grabs the leg of RVD, RVD is now stuck on the top of the pod. Test comes in with a chair, RVD eats a massive chair shot to the knees and back. Test yanks RVD down and lays a chair on RVD’s face. Test climbs to Show’s pod and delivers an elbow old school Test style and that’s all she wrote for RVD.

RVD Has Been Eliminated!

We wait with nothing happening as Lashley is not in the match yet from his pod, we wait for a minute and a half as nothing happens. Delightful, Heyman’s goons lock in Lashley, Lashley smashes through the top of the pod and escapes to fight Test. Diving clothesline by Lashley, Test is sent crashing into the pod. Right hands to the face of Test, eye poke by Test. Foot choke in the corner, Lashley kicks a chair back into Test’s face. Clothesline and snap suplex by Lashley, crowbar to the ribs of Test and a massive Spear.

Test Has Been Eliminated!

Down to two, Show and Lashley. Lashley pulls out a table as we wait for Show to enter the match. Still forty seconds to wait, Lashley tries breaking into the pod. Show has a barbed wire bat, Lashley uses a chair to shield himself from Show. Show gets the bat stuck in the chamber, Lashley rams Show into the wall. Show is bleeding and thrown through the pod, right hands by Lashley. Show tosses Lashley into the ring, clothesline by Show. Show calls for the end, Lashley dodges for a DDT. They slug it out, Show misses a splash. Show looks for a powerslam, Lashley wriggles free for a Spear, it is over.

Three eliminations out of four happened back to back, no time to set in, no time to allow the match to breather. But maybe that was for the better as this was not a good elimination chamber match, it could have been done a  lot better. I did not feel the struggle for Lashley to win, Lashley went in and dominated that was all there was to it. No struggle, no babyface overcoming the odds I mean he was the second last one in the ring. RVD and Punk were far more over with the audience, the best parts of the match had RVD in them while Punk did not get much of a chance to shine in the slightest. Lashley is crowned your new champion, Lashley had such a strange career trajectory. From looking like a monster to jobbing out to the likes of Finlay, Kane in the survivor series match, losing to Booker, all these losses build up and yet, the idea is that Lashley is this unstoppable beast? I find it hard to buy into that idea when young Lashley had been stopped so many times.

Winner: Bobby Lashley over Big Show via Spear!

That was ECW’s December to Dismember 2006, a terrible show in every sense of the word. The pay per view had the vibe of a UK pay per view mixed with New Year’s Resolution, what I mean by this is the matches are a poorer standard because the wrestlers do not need to work as hard at Rebellion or Insurrextion as we all know no championship changes or anything of significance will take place. The New Year’s Resolution aspect is this show was built around one match, that being the chamber and even if the rest of the card is weak, the main event, the chamber match will make up for it.

However, this does not happen here. We have house show level matches sprinkled throughout the card with people who were essentially thrown together for the sake of the pay per view. We even had a heel vs heel match in there at one point, it was terrible and the crowd reacted appropriately with silence as they knew they were watching a tonne of crap and going through the motions. This was the end of Paul Heyman in ECW, the messiah had been hindered by Vince’s direction for the brand but nobody could deny that this pay per view is one of the worst in recent memory. Thanks for reading and remember: There’s always another night!

 

WWF Judgement Day 2001 Review

Another Day = another review! Welcome ladies and gentleman to the only professional wrestling blog that is not on the list of Jericho: Seanomaniac’s Wrestling Reviews where I, The Seanomaniac reviews wrestling pay per views and moments of the past. Tonight I shall be diving head first into WWF’s Judgement Day 2001. The Power Trip had been formed and they hold all the gold, Undertaker and Kane stand as our heroes against the evil Triple H and Stone Cold Steve Austin. In the mid-card, we have Chyna’s final WWF match and Chris Benoit vs Kurt Angle one last time as Angle bids to recover his stolen gold medals. Business may be down but certainly the action has not cooled off (God I hope not!) so let’s rock! This is Judgement Day 2001!

Opening Promo

 We see a homeless man proclaiming that we are all going to die, pain, wrath and hell is upon us. We see Taker, Austin, Kane and Triple H with flashes of action and blood. Stage has a cool design with hour glasses of sand being replaced with blood because blood is hardcore. Ok I am over-exaggerating but the design is nice and refreshing from the bland HD stages of today’s pay per view.

William Regal vs Rikishi

Rikishi had returned from injury as a face and stinkfaced Stephanie Mcmahon, Rikishi was back being a face since his infamous heel turn so let’s see how the big guy does as he tries to win back the momentum he had lost. Regal warns Rikishi that he shall beat the piss out of the fat man and Regal will not be taking no stinkface tonight. Reception is pretty good for the recently turned Rikishi, JR talks about a potential shoulder injury for Rikishi.

 I imagine Regal will work this into the match, Rikishi hammers Regal with right hands, clothesline and a headbutt by Rikishi. Regal blocks a potential stinkface in the early going, Regal low blowed Rikishi. Regal pummels Rikishi against the ropes, Rikishi counters. Sunset flip by Regal does not work but Rikishi does not land his ass on Regal’s chest. In the corner, Regal uses forearm shots to punish Rikishi, European Uppercut floors Rikishi. 

Regal chokes Rikishi with his knee and waves to the crowd. Rikishi reverses an Irish whip, huge clothesline. Corner ass splash and a stinkface to Regal. Regal is deep in that ass! Regal’s facials are great once again as he feigns puking on the outside. Rikishi slams Regal’s head into the steel steps, massive sidekick. Rikishi runs into the ringpost and slams his shoulder. Regal takes advantage and Regal Cutters Rikishi for the win. That was brief, there was not a story to the match but the finish played into the brief narrative explained by JR with Rikishi slamming his arm into the ringpost.

Winner: Regal over Rikishi following a Regal Cutter!

Edge & Christian Promo

The dynamic duo speak of Jericho’s mystery partner for the tag team turmoil match tonight, Christian reassures Edge that there is nothing to worry about as they will become eight time tag team champions. Kurt Angle interrupts and asks for tips for his potential ladder match clash with Chris Benoit. Christian tells Kurt not to fall off because falling off sucks while Edge says if you are going to fall off, make sure you have your medals. Kurt leaves to prepare for his match.

Triple H Promo

Triple H meets Vince Mcmahon and Triple H is questioned about messing with Undertaker’s wife. Triple H makes fun of Vince saying don’t mess with another man’s wife as Vince messed with Linda. Vince retorts yeah but that was my wife, Undertaker might kill you!

(Two out of Three Falls Match) Kurt Angle vs Chris Benoit

Chris Benoit stole Angle’s medals and stuffed them down Benoit’s pants. Angle stole back the medals at one stage, comically kissing them but Benoit took back the medals after a Crippler Crossface. Interestingly, these two had the same type of match as Insurrextion with Benoit winning two straight falls. First fall you can only win by pin, second fall is only by submission and final fall is a ladder match.

 These guys won’t be going easy like Insurrextion, this is an American pay per view so my expectation are high. Angle jumps Benoit, stomps on the corner, no feeling one another out this time. Angle hammers Benoit with right hands, German suplex, make it two and a third for good measure. Angle goes to the top rope, Angle attempted a headbutt like Benoit, Benoit drills Angle with The Angle Slam and Benoit is up 1:0!

Benoit locks in The Crippler Crossface for a quick victory but Angle bails to the floor, Benoit rams Angle into the steel steps. Angle is hurled into the steel steps, Angle also eats chops from Benoit. Benoit misses a chop and Angle sends Benoit into the ringpost groin first. Stomps on the floor by The Olympic Hero, Benoit is bounced repeatedly off the announce table.

 Angle was thinking Ankle Lock but Benoit makes it to the ropes. Benoit is whipped into the corner, boot to the face by Benoit. Both men trade submission attempts before Angle reaches the ropes after a Crossface attempt by Benoit. We are back on the floor, Angle stomps Benoit when we are back in the ring. Elbow to the nose by Angle, Angle rakes the eyes of Benoit and clubs The Rabid Wolverine in the back over and over. Snap suplex by Angle, belly to belly by The Olympic Hero. Angle looked for the belly to belly once more but Benoit has the Crossface. Angle reaches the ropes, Benoit has to break the hold, massive clothesline by Benoit. Angle was playing possum, Ankle Lock does not work for Kurt as Benoit reaches the ropes.

 Chops by Kurt and now right hands by The Olympic Hero. Benoit snap suplexes Angle, Angle retaliates with a hotshot onto the ropes. Leg grapevine with a sleeper by Angle, Benoit trips up Angle and we have a Liontamer by Benoit. Angle is able to survive and rolls to the ropes. Benoit executes the figure four, Angle rolls to the ropes again. Mean right hand from Benoit, shin breaker by Benoit. Benoit drops all his weight on Angle’s leg, shin breaker into a dragon screw leg whip. Angle hangs onto the ropes, knee to the ribs by Kurt and Benoit is hurled to the floor. 

Angle lays into Benoit by the barricade, Benoit battles back on Angle, DDT by Benoit. Angle staggers to the ropes, Angle Slam by The Olympic Hero. Ankle Lock and we have a tap-out. It is 1:1!

Kurt stomps Benoit who falls to the floor, Angle is not happy about having a ladder match. Angle tosses Benoit into the steel steps, Kurt makes his way towards the ladder. Kurt grabs this tiny red ladder, I guess it is meant to represent Angle’s fear of the match so it looks safer and easier to climb than the regular ladder.

 Benoit pushes Kurt off the ladder and throws Angle into the crowd. Benoit grabs the proper ladder and climbs high for the medals, Angle yanks Benoit off the ladder and pushes over the ladder. Belly to belly suplex, Angle grabs the ladder and batters Benoit in the ribs three times. Benoit dodges the fourth shot as Angle is elevated to the floor along with the ladder. Benoit smacks Angle in the jaw with the ladder, Benoit climbs the ladder but Angle is still alive. Low blow and Angle yanks Benoit off the ladder. Angle props a ladder in the corner and introduces Benoit’s face to the ladder.

 Benoit counters the Irish whip into the ladder and catapults Kurt into the ladder. Benoit drops the ladder onto Angle who is in a heap underneath the ladder. German suplex by Benoit, Benoit wedges the ladder in the corner horizontally. Benoit and Angle trade blows, Angle Irish Whips Benoit into the ladder. Snap suplex by Angle on the ladder, Benoit recovers to seesaw the ladder into Angle’s face. Ladder to the face, Benoit drops Angle under the ladder and plans to climb. Angle is still strong enough to tip the ladder from underneath and Benoit smacks off the turnbuckle. Shoulder thrust by Kurt, make it three.

 Benoit retaliates and Irish whips Angle before applying The Crippler Crossface. Edge & Christian are here, Benoit wipes out the back-up but Angle is all alone in the ring and Kurt steals the medals while Benoit deals with Edge & Christian. Ok let’s break it all down, the first fall was brief but it set the tone for the match. Kurt had slowly eased his way into prior matches with Benoit, they would mat wrestle and feel one another out but with the loss of his medal, Kurt loses it and attacks Benoit wildly, drilling the man with three German suplexes.

 However, Kurt’s eagerness has led him to blind rage and Kurt gets over-zealous as he attempts a diving headbutt which misses and allows Benoit to gain victory in the first fall. In the second Kurt learns from his mistake and attacks Benoit slowly breaking him down. Both men attempt their finishers multiple times and both reach the ropes many times.

 I would say I felt the finish to this fall came off as flat as Kurt had not decimated Benoit’s ankle, it was rather Benoit who has messed up Kurt’s ankle with figure fours and a Liontamer. So for me, Kurt nailing The Angle Slam and the following Ankle Lock came out of nowhere. The final fall was not much in terms of wrestling, it was just some interesting and cool ladder spots. That doesn’t bother me because I was expecting technical wrestling in the ladder match. It was a good series with Kurt regaining his medals.

Winner: Kurt over Benoit following a retrieval of the medals!

Regal/Undertaker Promo

Someone is calling Undertaker’s wife, Austin is the suspected culprit. Taker threatens Regal into making the WWF Championship match a No Holds Barred Match. Jerry Lynn is also live from WWF New York, Lynn is pissed that he is in New York and not whipping ass at Judgement Day.

(WWF Hardcore Championship Match) Test vs Big Show vs Rhyno ©

Test & Big Show had been feuding since Show went after Shane, Shane is not here at Judgement Day so we shall see Test take on Big Show after Big Show lost his match to Shane thanks to Test. However, that is not it as Rhyno is here for some reason and his title is on the long, Rhyno wastes no time and brings steps into the ring. Test and Rhyno teaming up does not work well as Show clotheslines both men. Rhyno is knocked to the floor by Show while Test lowbridges Show.

 Test & Rhyno team up to whip Show into the barricade, the alliance breaks down as Rhyno whips Test into Show and all three men are now battling in the crowd. We are backstage as Test chokes Show with some sort of hose, Rhyno is on the floor. Rhyno uses a cart with anvil cases to batter Rhyno, Test grabs Rhyno and throws the champion into some boxes.

 Show is back to his feet, Rhyno leaves a dent in a wall, Show tries to pin Rhyno on the wall, Test makes the save and the two smack Show onto some pallets. Test and Rhyno spill into the arena, Rhyno hurls Test into the ringpost. Rhyno has some trash cans and lids, Test is thrown into the ring. 

Test punches a lid into Rhyno’s face, the crowd chant for Show who appears from the crowd. Rhyno ducks a punch from Show but Show nails a Chokeslam, Test drop Show with his Big Boot. Cover by Test only gets a two count, Rhyno Gores Show but Test dodges, trash can to the head of Rhyno from Test.

 Two count! Test has a fire extinguisher, Rhyno eats a big boot and Show is blinded by the extinguisher. Test grabs some steel steps, Rhyno nails Test with a trash can. Rhyno throws a trash can at Show and runs up the steel steps to Gore Show for the win. That match was ok, not a lot of wrestling and not a lot of weapons/violence for a hardcore match. It was a really average match.

Winner: Rhyno over Everyone Else following a Gore! Gore! Gore!

Lita/Regal Promo

Regal is outside of Austin’s locker room, Regal panics and he does not want to talk to Austin. Regal tells Austin and is expecting to get killed but Austin says “Fine” to Regal’s surprise and it looks like Austin has a plan. Meanwhile, Lita is ready for her match against Chyna, Eddie offers Lita advice to fight Chyna but Lita rejects the help from Eddie.

(WWF Women’s Championship Match) Lita vs Chyna ©

Chyna won the championship in a match with Ivory at Wrestlemania, it was a burial and the division was not looking good with Chyna as the head as she wanted to fight men, she fought men for so long that for her to fight women now took out a lot of the wonder and excitement. Chyna destroyed the whole division even in handicap matches on the way to this match so this could be a bad day for women’s wrestling in the WWF. Lita was always super popular, the alternative to the likes of Trish, Lita was hugely over. 

Lockup and Chyna shoves off Lita, Chyna lifts up Lita as we see the two are friends. Lita dodges elbows from Chyna and throws Chyna into the corner. Gut kick from Chyna, gorilla press slam is countered by Lita. Lita went to help up Chyna but Chyna suckered her in for a pin, two count for Chyna and a huge forearm by Chyna. Kicks to the rib and a massive knockdown by Chyna.

 Short-arm clothesline for a two count, spinning DDT by Lita who punches Chyna repeatedly. Leaping clothesline from the second rope for Lita, Lita uses an arm-wringer as Chyna momentarily pops out of her dress. Chyna rakes the eyes of Lita and floors her with a forearm. Swinging neckbreaker and a powerslam for two, military press slam to Lita who lies on a crumble on the ground, Chyna disrespects Lita dragging her to her feet. Cross armbreaker by Lita on Chyna. Chyna is caught for her taunting, crowd is cheering for Lita.

 Chyna counters into a headscissors and Eddie Guerrero is at the top of the ramp. Eddie watches with his arms folded, Lita struggles out of the headscissors. Chyna hair pulls Lita across the ring, Powerbomb is countered for a hurricanrana by Lita. Close two count, Twist of Fate is countered into the Powerbomb. It is over and Eddie shakes his head. The thing about this match is it is hard to rate as there would be no follow-up to anything that took place in the ring.

 We were not able to see Chyna turn heel in the division as there were multiple times in the match where she came across as the bully and took shortcuts (the sneaky pin, eye-rake etc). We also did not see what Eddie’s storyline with Lita would have been as Chyna & Eddie would be gone from the WWF after this pay per view, the women’s title would be deactivated until Survivor Series. So it was an ok match, nothing sloppy so it was a lot better than a lot of women’s matches I have seen through my time covering the WWF.

Winner: Chyna over Lita following Powerbomb!

(WWF Intercontinental Championship match) Triple H © W/ Stephanie Mcmahon vs Kane (Biker’s Chain Match)

Kane had his arm destroyed by Triple H and Austin, Kane is back though and Kane wants the intercontinental championship. Isn’t it funny seeing Triple H as intercontinental champion? Makes me laugh every time! Kane’s arm is heavily bandaged so expect Triple H to work the arm.

 Triple H has his own chain, he assaults Kane with the chain before Triple H rips at the arm of The Big Red Machine. Triple H smashes Kane’s arm into the ring apron and ringpost. Triple H grabs a chair and smacks Kane across the back, Kane’s arm is on top of the announce table and The Game whacks the arm with a chair. Triple H ties himself to the chain as Kane’s arm could be nullified after the beating from The Cerebral Assassin.

 Kane is up, Kane pummels Triple H before The Game reasserts his dominance by attacking the arm. Triple H tugs on Kane’s arm before nailing a double axe handle, Kane powers out of a pin attempt. Triple H kicks the arms and ribs of The Big Red Machine. Triple H uses the chain to further damage the arm of Kane. Triple H has a chair but Kane is on his feet, Kane pulls Triple H into the ringpost and the chair smacks back into Triple H’s face. 

Triple H is bleeding and Kane goes wild, again and again, Triple H eats the steel steps. Triple H begs for mercy from Kane, Kane chokes The Game and rakes the face of the champion. Massive shot with the chain to the face of The Game, Triple H powders to the floor. Triple H is choked and whipped with the chain, Kane was measuring for his signature clothesline but Triple H yanked Kane off the turnbuckle. Clothesline by The Game, we are back on the floor.

 Kane and Triple H battle to the crowd, Triple H pulls Kane into the barricade. Kane slams Triple H from the top of the barricade to the floor. Sounded sore, facebuster and clothesline in the ring by Helmsley. Triple H measures for The Pedigree, Kane reverses and drops head first on The Game’s crown jewels. Smack with the chain by Kane, Kane is climbing high and Triple H eats a chain clothesline. Chokeslam by Kane, Austin is here and Kane boots The Rattlesnake, tossing his sorry ass to the floor. 

Triple H takes Kane to dick-kick city, Austin has a chair and Austin cracks Triple H with the chair by mistake. Kane covers Triple H after Austin had knocked out The Game with the chair. That was a very physical match lots of psychology with the arm work, I think the match could have benefited with Kane going ape on Undertaker in the beginning of the match as it was very slow at the start with all the arm work while Kane winning clean would not be the worst thing to happen.

 However, Stone Cold attacking Triple H with the chair would tie in with the narrative being told of dissention between Austin and Triple H. Triple H would accidently nail Austin with a sledgehammer in their tag team match on Raw and they would lose the titles. The plans were to have Triple H face Austin at a later stage so the match was good!

Winner: Kane over Triple H following a Stone Cold Chair Shot!

(Tag Team Turmoil) Edge & Christian vs APA vs The Dudley Boyz vs The Radicalz vs Chris Jericho/? Vs X-Factor

Two teams start, when a team is eliminated, another enters until we have one team left. APA start out with The Radicalz, Dean Malenko and Perry Saturn. I am glad that Malenko had another pay per view match after the dreadful Double Ho Seven Storyline with Lita. Saturn belly to belly suplexes Faarooq, the referee restrains Bradshaw while Malenko calf kicks and stomps Faarooq.

 Saturn receives the tag from Malenko, Saturn beats down Faarooq before we have a double knockdown. Malenko cheap shots Faarooq, Bradshaw knocks out Malenko and Faarooq spinebusters Saturn for the first elimination.

Up next are The Dudley Boyz with little brother Spike. Bradshaw and Faarooq assault Bubba and D-Von. Double shoulder block to D-Von, D-Von eats a powerslam from Faarooq. Bradshaw hot shots D-Von, D-Von creates some space with a flying shoulder block. Bubba is legal, right hands from Bubba.

 Bubba misses a splash, Bradshaw is legal. Double clothesline to Bubba, elbow and a cover for a two count. Bradshaw’s clothesline is countered into a sidewalk slam, D-Von is in and we have a reverse elbow. D-Von scores with a leaping clothesline and a Russian legsweep. Bradshaw clubs D-Von, fallaway slam by the big Texan. Big boot by Bradshaw, Bubba saves D-Von.

 Bradshaw has D-Von perched on the top rope, Bubba has Bradshaw on his shoulders, Dudley death device. Faarooq receives the diving headbutt to the groin, it is time for tables. D-Von has the table set up on the floor, Hardcore Holly slams D-Von through the table and Bradshaw Clotheslines From Hell Bubba so The APA are advancing while the story of Spike & Molly continues to cause problems.

X-Factor enter the match, X-Pac has no beard and it is bizarre, it looks so wrong. Faarooq wastes no time with X-Pac, massive back breaker and Bradshaw is legal, snap suplex by Bradshaw. Giant back suplex by Bradshaw, X-Pac puts his foot on the ropes to survive. Tag to Justin Credible who is bowled over with a shoulder block, Bradshaw beats on Credible on the floor.

 Albert gets involved with a massive boot to the face. Bradshaw recovers in the ring with a powerslam, Faarooq is legal. Second rope leg drop for a two count, Credible reverses Faarooq with a facebuster and X-Pac is in the ring. Corner choke by X-Pac, kicks and chops. 

Powerslam by Faarooq for a two count, Bradshaw receives the tag, big boot to Justin Credible. Bradshaw was looking for a fallaway slam but Albert grabs the leg, tripping Bradshaw and holding onto the leg so X-Pac steals the pin.

The Hardys run to the ring, they pose as X-Factor slither into the ring. The Hardys whip X-Factor into one another, Jeff has Credible in the ring. Jeff is lowbridged by X-Pac and X-Factor ram Jeff into the ringpost.

 Albert gorilla press slams Jeff into the ring. Kicks in the corner by Jeff Hardy, bronco buster by X-Pac. Jeff double dropkicks X-Factor, Matt is in, neckbreakers on both X-Pac and Credible. Leg drop on X-Pac, Credible is knocked to the floor, poetry in motion on X-Pac. Scoop slam into the Swanton Bomb, Matt has the pin but Albert pulls out Matt. Jeff tope con hilos onto Albert but in the ring, Credible superkicks Matt and X-Pac gets the pin. X-Factor are alive!

Jericho’s music hits and we all wait to see his partner is none other than Chris Benoit! These two men who had one of the best feuds of 2000 are now partners, the masters of submissions teaming as one. Jericho is caught by Albert on the floor, Albert rams Jericho into the ring post and onto the barricade. X-Factor double team Benoit in the corner, chops to the chest of the fatigued Benoit. Tag to Credible, Credible boots Benoit in the corner, sit-out powerbomb from the turnbuckle.

 Sleeper in the centre of the ring, X-Pac is legal and clothesline Benoit. Corner kicks from X-Pac, X-Pac misses the bronco buster. Jericho is legal, Credible is knocked to the floor, chops to X-Pac, missile dropkick. Credible tries to make the save, pays for it by being knocked to the floor.

 Jericho flying forearms the referee, Albert beats up Benoit and X-Factor nail X marks the spot for a two count. Credible has Jericho, X-Pac is crotched by Benoit. Credible is catapulted into X-Pac, Albert is suplexed onto Creidble and we have a double submission spot with Jeriho and Benoit tapping out X-Factor with their submission moves.

Edge & Christian rush to the ring, Jericho chops Edge in the ring. Stalling suplex by Jericho, Christian drop toeholds Benoit into the steel steps. Edge hot shots Jericho into the ropes, Edge forearms Jericho hard. Christian stomps Jericho and hammers away on Y2J. Standing dropkick by Edge, Jericho battles back and Edge cuts off Y2J with a massive knee to the mid-section. Christian is sent back by Y2J, Jericho misses a right hand and Christian nails a neckbreaker. Christian pisses off Benoit so Benoit comes in the ring, the heels put the boots to Jericho. Jericho attempts the Lionsault but Edge puts the knees up, Benoit saves Jericho from losing the match.

 Edge & Christian’s attempt at poetry in motion does not work as Jericho dodges and Benoit gets the hot tag. Snap suplex by Benoit, Christian clubs Edge by mistake. Benoit German suplexes Christian with a bridge for a two, Jericho and Edge fight in the corner. Benoit is left alone as Y2J is down, Christian and Edge were attempting a superplex. Christian is caught by Benoit and Jericho, missile dropkick by Benoit onto Christian who is on top of Y2J’s shoulders. Edge sends Jericho into the ringpost and DDTs Benoit.

 Edge & Christian are readying for a Conchairto but Jericho and Benoit nail a double baseball slide. Benoit and Jericho were aiming for a Conchairto but Edge speared Jericho, Benoit was rolled up for a two count. Benoit locks in the Crossface on Christian after Jericho stops a Conchairto from Edge & Christian. Christian taps and we have your winners. Ok so elimination matches are short on story and high on action and eliminations (Naturally enough).

 A lot of the matches were quick, over before you could even process what was happening. So it was alright, Jericho getting revenge and Benoit gaining retribution over Edge & Christian was a nice touch to what was many quick, average tag matches. Benoit & Jericho would go on to have one of the best Raw main events in recent memory against Stone Cold & Triple H. Sadly, Benoit’s death would affect the match’s prestige and availability due to the circumstances surrounding Chris Benoit’s murder/suicide.

Winners: Benoit & Jericho over Everyone Else following survival!

(WWF Championship Match) Stone Cold Steve Austin © vs The Undertaker (No Holds Barred Match)

Austin had called the police and ambulance services alerting them that Taker’s wife had been in a car crash. It turned out to be a hoax and I will dive more into that story in a few moments. Taker attacks Austin on the ramp way, lots of punching by The American Badass who chokes Austin with camera cables. Vince is at ringside doing commentary as Taker continues to  brutalize The Rattlesnake. 

Undertaker uses the barricade for Old School, Austin runs to the entrance way. A few right hands by The Rattlesnake but Taker is dominating Austin. Fire extinguisher to the head of Taker, Taker grabs a chair from ringside. Austin starts building some offence, Austin drills Taker with a neckbreaker. Austin rams Taker into the turnbuckle and starts kicking the knee of Taker. Taker avoids a chair shot, leaping clothesline by Taker.

 Austin avoids the tombstone, Taker avoids the Stunner, big boot for a two count for The American Badass. Huge right hand from Taker on the outside, Taker shoves Austin into the timekeeper’s area. Taker stalks Mcmahon but Austin makes the save, Austin works the leg. The ringpost is the weapon of choice. Right hand by Austin, Taker tastes the steel step. Elbow and chop block by Austin, Mcmahon laughs with glee. Austin stomps Undertaker in the knee, single leg takedown and kicks to the leg.

 Low blow from Austin, Austin repeatedly slams Taker’s leg into the mat. Taker rakes the eyes to break Austin’s grip. Austin uses low blows to regain control of the leg, Taker breaks the hold of Austin with shots to the face with his leg. Huge clothesline and Austin is on the floor, Taker redecorates the announce table and looks for a Chokeslam. Taker plants Austin right through the announce table, Vince is running from Undertaker.

 Undertaker pushes Austin into the ring, cover and a two count for the challenger. Undertaker stomps Austin in the middle of the ring, Undertaker scoop slams Austin and nails an elbow. Cover and a two count, Taker is distracted by Vince and Austin bullseyes Taker with a monitor. Austin unties the turnbuckle, exposing the steel. Taker is bleeding everywhere, Austin rams Taker into the steel steps and announce table. Clothesline by The Rattlesnake, Austin and Taker trade blows with Austin gaining control with a Lou Thesz Press. 

Austin low blows Undertaker and covers for a two count. Austin is frustrated with the referee, Austin chokes Taker with the ropes, knee across the back by Austin. Austin has a sleeper on The Deadman, Taker reverses with a back suplex. Austin recovers to scramble Taker’s head with a chair shot! Austin wants Taker to get up, Taker flips off Austin. Stunner by Austin, cover and a two count as Taker kicks out of The Stunner. Austin has the chair, shots to the back. Austin motions to stab Taker but Taker low blows Austin.

 Chokeslam in the centre of the ring, Taker looks to the chair and Taker wears out Austin with the chair. At least 6 shots with the chair, Triple H has a sledgehammer, Taker wallops Triple H with the chair. Austin takes another shot, Vince saves Austin from losing the title. Taker hits Mcmahon, Austin nails Vince by mistake. Undertaker sets up for a Last Ride on Austin but Triple H saves the day with a sledgehammer to the face.

 Kane’s music hits but Austin pins Taker to retain the title. Austin vs Undertaker matches have never appealed massively to me, they are two of the biggest stars in the industry and fought throughout the late 90s and early 00s but I never felt we got the big match we deserved from these two. I enjoyed the main event but it just did not click with me. The interference was typical of Attitude Era WWF, we had chairs, Vince and finally, it was a sledgehammer that put down Undertaker.

 I must say I enjoyed the story being told that Undertaker had what it takes to put down Stone Cold but Triple H had Austin’s back, Austin had accidently screwed Triple H out of the intercontinental championship but when push came to shove, Triple H had his priorities straight and he helped Austin hold onto his championship. So the seeds were being planted for Triple H’s turn, Austin could have said he defended his championship and got the job done on his own. Austin would blame Triple H for the tag team championship loss to Benoit & Jericho so you had the feud simmering between The Power Trip.

 Where the match falls for me is Austin receiving cheers and garnering crowd chants, it is normal nowadays, heels are cheered because we like them and they are more interesting than the bland babyfaces but this is not cheering a heel because it is cool, this is full-on rejection from the WWF fans who do not want to see a cowardly Stone Cold Steve Austin, they wanted their hero, the man who fought the system and drank beer every night. The reaction to Austin really hurts the match for me, it is like a fly in your room. Just making noise and you are constantly aware of it due to the extent where you cannot concentrate on what you are trying to do.

Winner: Austin over Undertaker following a Sledgehammer Facial!

Overall, Judgement Day 2001 was an average pay per view, providing three really solid matches with a lot more matches that had little meaning or substance to them. The three stages of hell match and The Power Trip matches were the highlights while most of the other action is largely forgettable. Following this pay per view would make a major turn though, WCW stars were beginning to cross over to the WWF and it shall make for a very interesting time in wrestling. Change was coming and we could be on the verge of a war between WCW and WWF. You couldn’t possibly fuck this up could you? Right? ……………