
Hello and welcome to another edition
of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the
internet that is more baffling than wrestling with no crowds! It’s WWF Royal
Rumble 1991 where Vince names all the rumble competitors without somehow his
voice exploding. Saba Simba, The British Bulldog, The Mountie seems like there
a lot of new fresh faces here in the WWF. We also have The Ultimate Warrior
defending his WWF Championship against Sgt. Slaughter which should be an
interesting match for sure. Also, we do get a conclusion to Dibiase vs Rhodes
as we have a big tag match to settle that feud, looking forward to this one as
the first pay per view of 1991. Oh Roddy Piper is on commentary again, that’s
erm well let’s just continue…
The Rockers vs
The Orient Express W/ Mr. Fuji
A new Orient Express as Sato is no
longer here, The Rockers continue to be a super popular team with the fans,
their tag team moves continue to be creative and exciting for sure. Tanaka
jumps Jannetty, sending Jannetty to the floor to begin this match. Back drop to
Michaels from The Orient Express. Jannetty saves Michaels from a double team
with a dropkick, superkick to Tanaka. Double gorilla press slam, double suicide
dives onto the Orient Express. Jannetty and Kato kick us off, Jannetty holds
onto a side headlock to maintain control. Kato throws rights to the ribs,
leapfrogs and duck downs. Counters galore before a hip-toss from Kato, Jannetty
counters for a head-scissors as we have more counters and a standoff.
Kato backs Jannetty to his corner,
Tanaka distracts Jannetty and Kato takes control. In comes Tanaka who is
shoulder blocked by Kato as Jannetty leapfrogs the attack, Fuji is livid.
Jannetty applies an arm-wringer, tag to Michaels. Top rope axe handle, nice
slam from Michaels. Tanaka eats a shoulder block, flying cross chop from Tanaka
as Michaels kicks out a two. Reverse chin-lock from Tanaka, Michaels elbows but
Tanaka tags Kato. Michaels bangs their heads together, Michaels hits Tanaka
with a running knee. Two for Michaels who applies a reverse chin-lock, Tanaka
escapes but runs into a sleeper. Kato nails a diving chop attack on Michaels
behind the referee’s back, Michaels is clutching his neck.
Michaels tries a kick but Tanaka
sweeps the legs, massive chop to the forehead. Big chop, right hands from
Tanaka. Michaels turns the tide and tees off on Tanaka, Jannetty nails Kato
before Michaels moonsaults onto Kato and punches him. Rockers nail double
dropkicks on the Orient Express before diving with crossbodies onto both
members of the express again. Exciting start for sure, snap-mare from Michaels
on Kato for two. Tag to Jannetty, Irish whip and double elbow for two. Michaels
is tagged in, Kato eats a big right hand. Michaels suplexes Kato, Tanaka makes
the save with a kick. Whip to the buckle, Michaels wants the monkey flip but
Tanaka stun-guns Michaels.
Kato stomps Michaels over and over,
Tanaka attacks Michaels behind the referee’s back with Fuji caning Michaels.
Massive throat chop from Tanaka, Kato tags in with some great double team
manoeuvre as Tanaka leapfrogs Kato and drops his weight on Michaels’ back.
Jannetty saves Michaels from being pinned, Tanaka is legal again. Throat thrust
from Tanaka, shoulder clamp from Tanaka. Michaels fades with Tanaka covering
for a close two, Tanaka continues to chop the head of Michaels. Tag to Kato,
big chop. Michaels is in the corner, Kato whips Michaels who flips to the apron,
superkick from Tanaka. Kato and Tanaka nail a double clothesline for a close
two.
Irish whip and Tanaka ducks his head,
Michaels drives Tanaka’s head into the mat. Kato knocks Jannetty off the apron,
Michaels is thrown to the ropes. Kato and Tanaka bang heads as they tried to
used a belt to beat up Michaels, Michaels tags in Jannetty. Right hands,
dropkicks too. Powerslam to Kato for two, whip by Jannetty. Flying reverse
elbow, Tanaka saves Kato. Michaels and Tanaka are on the floor, Tanaka kicks
Jannetty in the face allowing Kato to score with a backslide, close two. Kato
whips Jannetty, Michaels trips Kato who Jannetty covers for two.
Double Superkick on Kato, The Rockers
celebrate but they realize they have to finish this. Rocket Launcher is setup
but Tanaka shoves Michaels off the top rope and to the floor, Kato catapults
Jannetty into Tanaka for a massive throat chop. They go to nail it again with
Michaels nailing Tanaka with a massive right hand, Jannetty is catapulted and
counters Tanaka with a sunset flip for the win.
Crowd was hot for this one for sure,
the action breezed by in this match. The Rockers are so exciting inside of that
ring, so different from every other team in the tag division. LOD, Demolition
and such are nothing like The Rockers inside of that ring, Orient Express do
their part also which makes for a fast-paced exciting match. Finish was a
little rushed and compared to some of the double team manoeuvres that I saw in
there, I was hoping for something a little more exciting but it pops the fans
big and I was cheering on when it happened so great opening match, setting the
tone for the show hopefully as I have my fingers crossed.
Winners: The
Rockers over The Orient Express via Sunset Flip!
The Big Bossman
vs The Barbarian W/ Bobby Heenan
Before this match, Sherri begs Warrior
to grant Macho King a championship match to which Warrior refuses, an irate
Savage throws a tantrum due to Sherri’s failure to secure the match. Bossman
wants to murder Heenan due to Heenan’s comments about Bossman’s mother,
Barbarian is the latest member of the family to do battle with Bossman. To
begin, Barbarian nails big knees and uppercuts. Irish whip but its reversed by
Bossman, massive boot and elbow with Barbarian spilling to the floor. Heenan
regroups with Barbarian, Bossman slides out to the floor. Barbarian is sent
crashing shoulder-first into the ring-post, Heenan is cowering at ringside.
Barbarian eye rakes Bossman, Barbarian is on the top rope. Bossman catches
Barbarian in the ribs, both men spill to the floor off a clothesline. Bossman
spits on Heenan who is disgusted by this behaviour, Barbarian is chopped in the
ring. Barbarian lands a suplex on Bossman, beautiful suplex.
Massive clothesline from Barbarian,
Bossman is caught in the ropes. Barbarian boots and pummels Bossman who is all
tied up, Barbarian rips at the face of Bossman. Barbarian rams Bossman back
first into the ring-post, Heenan cannot wipe the smirk off his face.
Back-breaker from Barbarian for two, Bossman is hanging on in this match.
Bearhug from Barbarian, Bossman begins clubbing back at Barbarian. Big
Mongolian style chop from Bossman, throat thrust from Barbarian sends Bossman
down. Elbow drops from Barbarian, two for Barbarian.
Another bearhug from Barbarian,
Bossman is using the cheers of the crowd to will himself on, Barbarian squeezes
harder with Bossman fading fast. Bossman manages to hold on though, giant
headbutt. Make it three, Bossman bites the nose of Barbarian. Bossman holds his
back in pain, whip with Barbarian catching the boot but Bossman nails an
enzuigiri. Bossman rolls Barbarian over for two, Bossman whips Barbarian to the
corner with Barbarian dodging the splash for a schoolboy. Two for Barbarian,
Bossman ducks a clothesline and nails a stun-gun for a close two, did Barbarian
forget to kick out? Bossman picks up Barbarian and whips him off the ropes,
both men bang heads. Barbarian climbs to the top rope, Diving Clothesline
connects with Bossman surviving with his foot on the ropes.
Barbarian drags up Bossman, whip with
Bossman reversing and Bossman connects with his Bossman Slam. Bossman says it
is over, cover with Bossman almost winning as Barbarian reaches the ropes with
his fingers. Eye poke and big right from Barbarian, piledriver from Barbarian.
Barbarian climbs high once more, Bossman has no idea. Barbarian lands the
crossbody but Bossman rolls over and steals the win over Barbarian with Heenan
fleeing the arena as quick as possible.
This match was hit and miss for sure,
Heenan at ringside adds atmosphere to any match and the people do care about
the angle with everyone wanting Bossman to murder Heenan but I thought this
match was sloppy and exposed both men when it comes to working inside of that
ring. Barbarian works best when throwing someone around which he cannot do with
Big Bossman, Bossman works best when he is allowed to wreck house, Bossman had
to sell which he does well again to his credit but when Bossman hit the
stun-gun, it should have ended there and then. It seemed to drag on for too
long and it was more of a relief when this match was done.
Winner: Big
Bossman over Barbarian via Roll-Up!
(WWF World
Heavyweight Championship Match) The Ultimate Warrior © vs Sgt Slaughter W/
General Adnan
Iraqi Sympathizer Sgt Slaughter is
your challenger for the WWF Championship held by The Warrior. This match starts
with Warrior sprinting to the ring and clotheslining Slaughter and Adnan to the
floor before destroying the Iraq flag. Irish whip and clothesline from Warrior,
loud USA chants. Warrior shoves the flag down the throat of Slaughter, Irish
whip and a knee-lift. Slaughter hits the ring-post hard, more choking with the
flag. Whip to the buckle into a back
body drop, chops and right hands. Whip to the buckle with Slaughter hitting the
ring-post hard, corner clothesline from Warrior. Slaughter is sent crashing to
the floor, very one-sided contest so far. Wait a minute, here is Queen Sherri.
Warrior chokes Slaughter some more,
shoulder blocks from Warrior. Sherri grabs the leg of Warrior, Warrior chases
Sherri before Savage comes out of nowhere with a clothesline, Warrior is sent
into the guard-rail and smashed with one of the lights by the stage. The
referee was distracted by Slaughter, loud USA chants. Slaughter stops the
count, a count-out will do nothing for Slaughter. Warrior is hurt badly, the
sneak attack has left Warrior a weakened mess. In the ring, Slaughter batters
Warrior over and over. Back-breaker from Slaughter, Slaughter is spitting on
and trash-talking Warrior. Warrior meets the heeled boots, whip off the ropes.
Warrior ducks the clothesline and nails one of his own, both men are down.
Slaughter clamps on a bearhug, Warrior
breaks free and lands a scoop slam. Warrior crumbles though, his back is
hurting bad. Slaughter takes control with elbows to the spine, back-breaker
from Slaughter. Stomps to the spine from Slaughter, Camel Clutch from
Slaughter. The referee tells Slaughter that Warrior has his feet under the
ropes, Slaughter argues with the referee as Warrior begins to recover. The
punches are having no effect, Warrior blocks the right hand. Clotheslines all
around, flying shoulder tackle. Sherri is here again, Sherri her high heel and
she spits at Warrior.
Warrior grabs Sherri, dragging Sherri
into the ring. Warrior military presses Sherri onto Savage at ringside,
beautiful. Slaughter knees Warrior in the spine, Savage has his sceptre and
waffles Warrior in the head with it. Warrior is not moving, elbow drop from
Slaughter and we have a new WWF World Heavyweight Champion.
So, this was a good match for me.
Warrior selling fantastically, putting over the attacks of Savage from the
get-go. Warrior never stopped and I was hooked, I was willing on Warrior to
overcome the odds and batter the devious Slaughter. The booking of Slaughter
has been questionable but here we have a justification for it, the loud USA
chants rang out in the arena for this match. When Slaughter won, the crowd were
chanted BS it was great heat for what happened despite the questionable gimmick
of an Iraqi Sympathizer. D not get me wrong, evil foreigner gimmicks are all
too common but a guy who supports the enemy where your countrymen are being
killed on a daily basis, that’s a lot for a wrestling angle. Anyways, Savage
costing Warrior builds so much for this match which will be tremendous, I want
to see Warrior takedown Savage so badly. I really thought this was a standout
performance for Warrior and Slaughter played this one masterfully.
Winner: Sgt
Slaughter over The Ultimate Warrior via Sceptre To The Face!
The Mountie W/
Jimmy Hart vs Koko B Ware
The Mountie is here, a new recruit of
one Jimmy Hart. It is Jacques Rougeau formerly of The Rougeau Brothers. Mountie
misses a right as Koko is too quick, Koko is dancing and getting the crowd into
this one as Mountie shows frustration across his face. Gut shot and big right
from Mountie, whip and an elbow miss as Koko lands a dropkick. Mountie rolls
out, frustrated by these events. Arm-wringer from Koko, Mountie leapfrogs twice
before Koko pops Mountie right in the mouth.
Arm-wringer from Koko, Mountie punches
back before back dropping Koko to the floor. Mountie recovers, Koko is knocked
to the floor again. With the cattle prod, Mountie is in firm control. Mountie
face claw, Jimmy Hart talks trash at ringside. Mountie uses a full-nelson to
slam Koko’s head into the buckle, blatant choke from Mountie. Irish whip with
Koko countering with a sunset flip for two, Mountie has a pump-handle. Koko is
tossed to the floor with ease, Mountie steps around the ring. Mountie tries a
piledriver but Koko back drops Mountie off. Mountie re-assumes control with a
snap-mare and a kick to the ribs, whip with Mountie ducking his head.
Big neck-breaker counter from Koko,
Koko rallies and catches the boot of Mountie. Headbutt, flying headbutt too.
Scoop slam, Koko is going to the top rope. Beautiful missile dropkick for one,
Jimmy Hart distracts Koko. Koko lures in Mountie with a right hand, Mountie
eats a middle rope crossbody from Koko for two. Koko ducks a clothesline and
leapfrogs Mountie before a chokeslam like manoeuvre from The Mountie.
Dull and lifeless, the perfect
comedown after a big match. However, for a reviewer, it was brutal. Nothing
about this match comes off as good, it is just far too slow and Mountie either
has no interest in getting the crowd ramped up or does not know how because
this was as slow as Christmas.
Winner: The
Mountie over Koko B Ware via Chokeslam!
Dusty Rhodes
& Dustin Rhodes vs Ted Dibiase & Virgil
There have been issues between Virgil
and Ted Dibiase with Dibiase abusing Virgil to the point where it looks as if
Virgil is going to destroy Dibiase. However, fuck that noise because I am here
for Dusty murdering Dibiase. Survivor Series did not give me what I wanted but
the WWF has redeemed themselves as Dusty gets his hands on Dibiase after
Dibiase took away sweet Sapphire and bloodied Dusty’s son Dustin.
Virgil and Dibiase jumps the Rhodes,
Dibiase & Virgil are whipped into one another. Rights and elbows from the
Rhodes, Dibiase & Virgil recover on the floor. Dibiase commands Virgil to
take out Dustin, lock-up. Tied up in the ropes, Virgil cheap shots Dustin. Big
chop, whip with Dustin ducking and landing a massive clothesline, dropkick too.
Virgil is on the floor, Dibiase is not happy. Dibiase berates Virgil, knee and
clubbing blows from Virgil. Irish whip but Dustin counters with a shoulder
block, Virgil leapfrogs but eats a boot to the face and is clotheslined to the
floor.
Dibiase is fuming, Virgil tags in
Dibiase. Knee and chops from Dibiase, clothesline from Dibiase. Right hands to
Dustin, Dustin meets the buckle. Chop from Dibiase, whip off the ropes into a
back body drop. Dibiase mocks Dusty before delivering a fist drop, Dibiase
ducks his head off an Irish whip. Dustin slams Dibiase’s head into the mat, the
Rhodes nail elbows on Dibiase. Back into the ring, Dusty is legal. Dusty wants
a piece of Dibiase, big chops and elbows from Dusty. Irish whip and a sleeper
from Dusty, Virgil makes the save. Tag to Dustin, big right to Dibiase. Irish
whip into a dropkick, Virgil makes the save.
Eye rake from Dibiase, Virgil is now
legal. Whip to the buckle reversed by Dustin, Dustin smashes his knee off the
buckle. Dusty is concerned as Virgil stalks his prey. Massive kick to the hamstring,
Virgil and Dibiase take turns smashing the leg of Dustin off the ring-post.
Leg-snap from Dibiase, Dibiase laughs in the face of Dusty. Dibiase is
magnificent thus far, Virgil clotheslines Dibiase by mistake as Dustin ducks
the attack. Virgil looks to apologize with Dibiase attacking Virgil and tossing
Virgil to the floor. Dustin tags Dusty, right hands and elbows. Corner
clothesline, Dibiase dodges the second clothesline and rolls up Dusty for the
win. Dibiase berates Virgil after the win, asking him to bring him the belt and
place it around The Million Dollar Man’s waist. Virgil does not place the belt
around Dibiase’s waist, Virgil drops the belt. Virgil picks up the belt and
waffles Dibiase with the championship.
Granted, this crowd reaction for Virgil
is a beautiful thing. Years and years had gone into these two as characters
with Virgil breaking free from Dibiase being just magnificent, underrated when
it comes to huge pops in wrestling I believe. That being said, I was shocked
when I saw how this match ended but then I read on and discovered that this
would be the end of Dusty in the WWF which means you are doing the JOB on the
way out pal. Which is tremendously disappointing considering how much I had
invested into their feud, for it to serve as the backdrop to Virgil’s moment is
well frustrating.
Winners: Ted
Dibiase & Virgil over Dusty & Dustin Rhodes via Roll-Up!
(Royal Rumble
Match)
30 participants, one way to end and it
is by tossing your opponent over the top rope with both their feet touching the
floor. Two participants begin with competitors entering at regularly timed
intervals. Number one is none other than The Hitman Bret Hart, number two is Dino
Bravo. This should be interesting for sure!
Numbers 1 to 5
Side headlock by Bret, Bravo shoves
away Bret. Forearm by Bret, dropkick too. Atomic drop, Bravo is clotheslined
almost out with Jimmy Hart cheering on his superstar. Bravo fights his way out,
Irish whip and big kick by Bravo. Inverted atomic drop, stomp to the face.
Scoop slam and elbow drop misses for Bravo, right hands by Bret. Number three
is Greg The Hammer Valentine, the black hair is gone. Axe handles from
Valentine, Bravo and Valentine go at it in the middle of the ring with big
shots. Jimmy Hart is on the apron, Valentine is distracted and clotheslined
into the ropes by Bravo. Bravo is rammed into the buckle, Valentine manages to
toss out Bravo.
Dino Bravo Has
Been Eliminated By Greg Valentine!
Valentine takes out Jimmy Hart before
Bret lands an inverted atomic drop and a clothesline, Valentine is almost
tossed out as number four Paul Roma comes to the ring. Roma goes after the back
of Bret, Valentine and Roma attack Bret with elbows. Roma attacks Valentine
once Bret is down, elbows and kicks all around. Bret atomic drops Roma, Bret
knocks Valentine and Roma together. Bret is double-teamed by Valentine and
Roma, hanging on by a thread. Valentine and Roma begin swinging at one another,
number five is Texas Tornado. Massive punch floors Roma, the same comes for
Valentine.
Tornado and Valentine face off in the
corner, Bret misses a middle rope elbow on Roma. Tornado attacks Roma with
Valentine, Slick is looking nervous at ringside for sure. Roma and Tornado
square off in the corner, Bret battles Valentine. Roma dropkicks Tornado down,
Bret is foiled by Roma.
Entrants 6 to 10
Number six is Rick Martel, Martel goes
right after Bret. Bret is saved by Roma, Martel almost dumps out Roma. Tornado
and Bret double team Valentine as Bret goes back after Martel. Huge gut punches
and an eye rake, Martel is close to being eliminated by The Hitman. Roma saves
Martel and Martel nails a middle rope axe handle on Bret. Roma wipes out Martel
with a clothesline as number seven is Saba Simba. Tony Atlas is swinging at
everyone in sight, Simba comes out to little fanfare a real who the fuck is
that kind of reaction. Tornado almost atomic drops Martel to the floor. Simba
and Valentine are going at it as the ring is starting to fill with WWF Superstars.
Bret almost throws Martel over the top
rope, Tornado misses his right hand on Roma who begs for mercy. Martel eye
rakes Bret and survives, Tornado claws Roma. Number eight is Bushwhacker Butch,
Butch stomps around the ring before Valentine chops at Butch. Simba picks up
Martel but dumps Martel dumps out Saba Simba. Poor Tony Atlas.
Saba Simba Has
Been Eliminated By Rick Martel!
Martel takes it to Tornado in the
corner as Bret goes after Roma, number nine is Jake The Snake Roberts. Martel
and Roberts are swinging like crazy, Roberts is jabbing away at Martel.
Gut-buster from Roberts, Martel is slammed into the mat. Short-arm clothesline,
Roberts calls for the DDT. Martel rolls under the rope, Roberts goes through
the middle rope. Valentine goes after Roberts, The Snake will have to wait for
his prey. Martel is on the apron, Roberts hammers Martel with rights. Roberts
bites the hand, Martel fights back from elimination. Number ten is Hercules,
Power & Glory are in the ring. Roma and Hercules immediately work together
against Bushwhacker Butch.
Entrants 11 to 15
Bret and Martel almost tumble over
with Valentine giving the duo a push towards the floor, Roberts makes the save
though. Roberts has Martel to himself while everyone is paring off. Martel ties
Roberts in the ropes, Tornado starts pounding on Martel. Power & Glory are
chopping away at Valentine, number eleven is Tito Santana. Roma tries a crossbody
attack on Roberts but Roberts ducks and Roma goes sailing over the top rope.
Paul Roma Has
Been Eliminated by Jake Roberts!
Santana has Martel, there are two
people in there now who want to murder Martel. Tornado claws Roberts, strange
to see babyfaces and heels attacking one another. Martel is almost thrown over
by Santana, Valentine is looking for the double elimination on both but Bret
makes the save. Number twelve is The Undertaker with Brother Love, business has
just picked up. Taker headbutts Bret and tosses Bret over the top rope with
ease.
Bret Hart Has
Been Eliminated By The Undertaker!
Taker chokes Tornado, headbutt from
Taker. Roberts tries stunning Taker, no effect on the big man. Tornado is floored
by The Deadman, Martel and Roberts attempt to eliminate one another. Number thirteen
is Jimmy Snuka, unlucky 13 for Superfly. Taker grabs Butch and hurls Butch to
the floor!
Bushwhacker Butch
Has Been Eliminated by The Undertaker!
Taker chokes Tornado in the corner,
Valentine is going after Santana before Taker begins choking The Hammer.
Tornado will not leave Taker alone, Valentine nails an elbow but Taker is still
on his feet. Santana is swinging at Taker, three men are attacking Taker.
Number fourteen is The British Bulldog, Bulldog goes after Valentine and
Martel. Santana and Tornado are going after Taker, Taker is hanging on by a
thread. Bulldog atomic drops Martel, Roberts and Bulldog have Martel in the
corner. Number fifteen is Smash of Demolition, axe handles are incoming.
Entrants 16 to 20
Smash eats a massive clothesline from
Davey Boy, Snuka is attacking Taker to little effect. Santana has Valentine, we
get a bad camera cut but it appears Martel has outsmarted Roberts and The Snake
is out of this match.
Jake Roberts Has
Been Eliminated by Rick Martel!
Number sixteen is Road Warrior Hawk,
Hawk clubs everyone in sight with intensity. Hawk is battered by the heels
following his explosive entrance into the rumble. Hercules unloads on Hawk
before Hawk begins chopping back and smashing Hercules. Everyone is pairing off
in corners now, the ring is very full. The rumble needs someone to come in and
clear house, number seventeen is Shane Douglas. Douglas comes in and starts teeing
off on Smash, Taker has eliminated Texas Tornado while I believe Valentine
eliminated Jimmy Snuka.
Texas Tornado Has
Been Eliminated by The Undertaker!
Jimmy Snuka Has
Been Eliminated by Greg Valentine!
Taker chokes Bulldog in the corner,
Smash has Santana. Hawk and Hercules are clotheslining one another while
Douglas is looking to eliminate Valentine. Number eighteen is ??? It seemed
like someone was going to come through but nobody is coming down to ringside,
what’s the deal there? Number nineteen is Road Warrior Animal. Animal starts
attacking everything in sight, axe handles to everyone. Animal looks to aid
Hawk against Taker, Taker is being battered against the ropes, double
clothesline and Taker has been thrown out before Martel and Hercules dump out
Hawk.
Undertaker Has
Been Eliminated by LOD!
Hawk Has Been
Eliminated by Rick Martel & Hercules!
Santana goes after Martel who manages
to survive, everyone is in a corner once more. Number twenty is Crush of
Demolition, Bulldog gets a double clubbing from Demolition. Valentine has
Douglas in the corner, Douglas manages to hang on while Martel teases being
eliminated once more, Martel is the MVP of this match so far.
Entrants 21 to 25
Number twenty-one is Hacksaw Jim
Duggan, Duggan charges to the ring. Smash eats rights from Duggan, Martel is
Duggan’s next target. Before we have corner wars again, Douglas is battered by
Hercules. Santana and Animal double team Crush, number twenty-two is Earthquake.
The ring has a good chance of emptying now, Animal looks right at Earthquake
and they are going at it before Earthquake is clotheslined by Animal and
staggered before Earthquake backdrops Animal to the floor.
Animal Has Been
Eliminated by Earthquake!
Duggan and Earthquake are trading
blows, choking one another. Bulldog almost tosses out Martel before Smash ends
that attack. Number twenty-three is Mr. Perfect, Perfect and Duggan square off
with Duggan smacking down Perfect. Duggan tries a clothesline on Perfect but
Perfect ducks and sends Duggan to the floor.
Hacksaw Jim
Duggan Has Been Eliminated by Mr. Perfect!
Valentine and Smash are bouncing around
Perfect, Santana is taking it to Martel. Number twenty-four is Hulk Hogan,
Smash wants Hogan. Perfect comes in too, Hogan begins teeing off. Boot to Smash
who is tossed to the floor by Hogan, Hogan wants Earthquake.
Smash Has Been
Eliminated by Hulk Hogan!
Hogan is thwarted by Perfect,
Earthquake begins clotheslining Hogan in the corner, Hogan is almost dumped
over by Earthquake. Number twenty five is Haku, Hogan tosses out The Hammer as
Haku hits the ring.
Greg Valentine Has
Been Eliminated by Hulk Hogan!
Entrants 26 to 30
Lots of corner action going on,
Earthquake has Bulldog in a corner. Douglas saves Bulldog, Crush is choking
Hogan in the corner. Number twenty-six is Jim Neidhart, Santana is throwing everything
at Earthquake before Earthquake stops that nonsense with a headbutt and dumps
Santana to the floor.
Tito Santana Has
Been Eliminated by Earthquake!
Earthquake is choking Douglas in the
corner, Haku and Hercules want to throw out Hogan. Perfect is on the apron
talking strategy with Heenan, number twenty-seven is Bushwhacker Luke. Hogan
and Earthquake are battling before Earthquake tosses out Bushwhacker Luke.
Bushwhacker Luke Has
Been Eliminated by Earthquake!
Hogan and Earthquake are squaring off,
Earthquake has Hogan in the air but Bulldog makes the save with Douglas. Number
twenty-eight is Brian Knobbs, Knobbs attacks Martel and Haku. Perfect shuts
that down as six people club down Knobbs. Hogan bashes Perfect’s head into the
buckle, Smash saves Perfect. Knobbs manages to toss out Hercules, number
twenty-nine is The Warlord.
Hercules Has Been
Eliminated by Brian Knobbs!
Crush is dumped out by Hogan after
attempting some corner punches, Knobbs and Perfect attack Hogan.
Crush Has Been
Eliminated by Hulk Hogan!
Hogan is pummelling The Warlord as
Neidhart goes after Knobbs. Hogan reverses an Irish whip and dumps out Warlord with
a clothesline. Number thirty is The Tugboat.
Warlord Has Been
Eliminated by Hulk Hogan!
Tugboat goes after Earthquake, it’s
revenge time. Shane Douglas has been tossed out, camera missed it.
Shane Douglas Has
Been Eliminated!
Bulldog elbows Knobbs, Haku is
attacking Neidhart and Perfect. Earthquake has Hogan in the corner, big choke
from Earthquake. Tugboat and Bulldog almost dump out Martel, Tugboat attacks
Hogan almost dumping The Hulkster. Hogan does not forget that and dumps out
Tugboat, Bulldog places Perfect on the top rope and dropkicks out Perfect.
Tugboat Has Been
Eliminated by Hulk Hogan!
Mr. Perfect Has
Been Eliminated by British Bulldog!
Jim Neidhart Has
Been Eliminated by Rick Martel!
Haku Has Been
Eliminated by British Bulldog!
Martel scoop slams Bulldog, Martel
wants to nail a top rope diving attack but Bulldog is up, Martel is stuck as
Bulldog crotches Martel on the top rope and clotheslines Martel on the floor. Knobbs
and Earthquake attack Bulldog and dump out Bulldog!
Rick Martel Has
Been Eliminated by British Bulldog!
British Bulldog
Has Been Eliminated by Earthquake & Brian Knobbs!
Knobbs and Earthquake clothesline
Hogan, elbow attack and Earthquake Splash. Hogan no-sells it though and boots
Knobbs over the top rope, big right hands and boot to Earthquake. Jimmy Hart
has been knocked to the floor, Hogan rakes the eyes and tries a slam but
Earthquake is too strong. Earthquake nails an elbow, make it double. Running
powerslam connects from Earthquake, no pins in this match. Hogan begins Hulking
Up, right hands to Earthquake. Big boot, Earthquake stumbles around the ring
before Hogan slams him. Clothesline and Earthquake spills out to the floor!
Interesting Rumble match for sure, so
the concept is still relatively new having only taken place for 3 years at this
point. There seems to be an idea around having moments in there to get the fans
rampant and engaged but the execution is still lacking at this point. Strong showing
for Martel, the constant teases for his elimination built up for that wonderful
moment where Bulldog clotheslined him to the floor. Yes, it was very camp and
cheesy with Martel begging not to be crotched on the top rope but the fans
bought it and the roar for his elimination was great. Shocked by Undertaker and
Earthquake not clearing the ring, it was a real hit on the match. The ring was
filled with wrestlers constantly and there never was one clear moment where a
monster heel or babyface through everyone out, it was scattered and somewhat
random which I think hurt the match as it felt very long with not much in
between but also I do not know if they got across how difficult it would be to
dump out Earthquake or dump out Undertaker. Bulldog shines with the eliminations
given in this match, expect big things moving forward for Davey Boy and then we
have Hogan ending his battle with Earthquake once and for all. Definitive no
coming back for Earthquake, Hogan was the only real choice to face Slaughter as
Hogan bleeds red white and blue at this point. Overall, it had its moments but
a lot of was a tedious slog, not a super strong rumble.
Winner: Hulk Hogan
by Eliminating Earthquake!
That was WWF’s Royal Rumble 1991, another
mixed bag from the WWF on pay per view. We kick off with an exciting tag team
match that breezes by with Michaels and Jannetty showing great tag team offense
and chemistry leading to a match that has the fans going nuts from start to
finish. The finish was out of nowhere but it can be overlooked when compared to
what we have next with Bossman vs Barbarian. I like Bossman, I like Heenan and
this feud was personal but this match just kept going and it did not hit a
homerun for me. Thought it was too long and just flat at times, props to Bossman
when it comes to selling, that’s two matches where I have thought this man
knows what he is doing inside the ring.
Slaughter vs Warrior was awesome,
Savage weakens the Warrior forcing Warrior into an uphill battle against Slaughter.
Even so, Warrior tosses Slaughter around that ring and it builds and builds
until Savage strikes again costing Warrior the championship. The outrage from
the fans as Slaughter is declared champion is awesome, I think Slaughter could
have done more to rile up the crowd when in control but the reaction justifies
Slaughter’s main event push. The gimmick is questionable but the response is 100%
spot on, the fans hate Slaughter and want to see him destroyed forever. We also
have Warrior having a reason to murder Savage at Wrestlemania. Mountie vs Koko
did nothing for Mountie, I have no faith in the character as this was torture.
Dibase & Virgil vs The Rhodes had a great angle once the match had
finished, the match did not give me the match I wanted in Dusty defending his
son by battering Dibiase. I am not happy about it and I do not think Virgil turning
babyface salvages what I envisioned but you cannot deny that the fans loved it.
Finally, I thought the rumble was very long in parts, never having that big
name to clear house. There were some interesting interactions like Martel vs
Roberts, Hogan vs Earthquake but the majority of the action was corner stuff
with eliminations coming at random. Hogan won and should have, we shall see if
Wrestlemania can kickstart 1991 with more positivity. Thanks for reading and
remember: there’s always another night!

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