Sunday, 8 January 2017

WWF Insurrextion 2002 Review





Good evening to you, chain gang members to another balls to the walls edition of the only internet wrestling review series that pumps up its sneakers more than John Cena: Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews. Here at my esteemed headquarters (AKA The Basement), I like to critique wrestling pay per views and they are certain shows I look forward to, the big four of the WWE are always fun, TNA pay per views are fun for other reasons but one type of pay per view that I love to cover is the UK pay per views of the WWF.

These shows have fans who have been starved of the product, are into most if not all the matches and the matches seem to be fun. Tonight, is no exception as I look at WWF’s Insurrextion of 2002, big matches on the card include Big Show vs Stone Cold Steve Austin as Austin continues to deal with The NWO, Undertaker vs Triple H in the main event and Eddie Guerrero vs RVD. So, let’s waste no more time and get this thing on the road, strap in for WWE’s Insurrextion 2002!

Opening Promo

It feels more like an opening for RAW as we see highlights of every superstar that will appear on the pay per view, cheesy announcer talks over the clips claiming that the WWF is in town!

(WWF Intercontinental Championship Match) Eddie Guerrero © vs Rob Van Dam

Guerrero defeated RVD for the championship at Backlash under dubious circumstances, Van Dam looks to regain his Intercontinental Championship. RVD seemed to be super over with the audience as expected, Guerrero grabs the arm but RVD sweeps Guerrero. High pace start with a stand-off, the crowd approves. Guerrero and RVD begin shoving, Guerrero smacks RVD square in the face, RVD nails a spinning heel kick and Guerrero powders. Baseball slide and moonsault from the apron by RVD.

Springboard legdrop for a two count by RVD, forearm shots to Guerrero. Split-legged moonsault by RVD gets a two count, shoulder thrusts by RVD. Guerrero counters for a sunset flip, RVD is back on top though with a monkey flip. Guerrero turns the tide by side-stepping RVD. Guerrero stomps all over RVD in the ring, back elbow for a two count. Guerrero rams RVD into the turnbuckle and begin stomping all over the challenger.

Elbows to the back of the head by Guerrero, vertical suplex with a floatover, two count for the champion. Slingshot splash from Guerrero, two count for the champion. Guerrero slaps on a sleeper, RVD makes it to the ropes. Sunset flip by RVD, two count, victory roll and another two count. Guerrero clotheslines RVD and applies a variation of the ankle lock. RVD makes it to the ropes, RVD unloads on Guerrero before the champion dropkicks RVD’s leg. Heel hook by Guerrero, dropkick to the knee by Van Dam. Guerrero works the leg of the challenger, RVD uses his free leg to kick off Guerrero.

Thrust kick by RVD, slugfest in the middle of the ring. Giant monkey flip by RVD, clothesline and a suplex with a floatover. Guerrero kicks out at two, scoop slam and Rolling Thunder for a two count. Guerrero gets caught in a rolling fireman’s carry, moonsault by RVD. Two count for RVD, RVD nails a spinning heel kick, Van Dam misses The Five Star Frog Splash. Guerrero has his championship, the referee is shoved down. The referee disqualifies Guerrero and RVD proceeds to smash Guerrero with the Intercontinental Championship and nails a Giant Five Star Frog Splash!

Very good opening match to the show, title changes never occur at these shows. RVD came out in the beginning like a house of fire, hitting Guerrero with everything he had, Guerrero works the leg building sympathy for Van Dam which disappointingly, Van Dam does not sell during his comeback. However, the crowd were big into RVD and it adds to the match so I say it was good.

Winner: RVD over Eddie Guerrero via Disqualification!

Trish Stratus & Jacqueline vs Molly Holly & Jazz

Terri interviews Jazz and Molly, Molly rips on the divas who use sex to exploit their image. Love me some heel Molly Holly, Trish and Jacqueline will be teaming up to take down the devious heels. Molly and Jazz wipe out Trish to double team Jacqueline, double suplex on Jacqueline. Atomic drop by Jacqueline, Jacqueline pounds on Molly. They do the cliché roll on the referee spot, Molly is not happy. Roll-up by Jacqueline for two, Jazz takes a cheap shot on Jacqueline. Double clothesline, Jazz nails Jacqueline with a slam, huge leg drop. Irish whip in the corner, Jazz clotheslines Jacqueline hard, Jazz misses a second leg drop.

Tag to Trish, clotheslines to Jazz. Jawbreaker by Jazz, Trish kicks Jazz in the face and throws in Molly Holly. Chops to the chest of Molly but Jazz smacks Trish down with a superkick. Kicks to the ribs by Jazz, chickenwing submission by Jazz. Trish is slammed face first into the mat, two count for Jazz. Tag to Molly, Molly throws Trish into the mat, handspring elbow by Molly. Jacqueline makes the save, Molly drags Trish by the hair to her corner. Jazz is legal, Jazz begins jabbing Trish, Trish blocks the final punch. Forearm to the face but Molly takes a cheap shot, Jacqueline is with the referee. Trish almost pins Jazz, roll-up by Jazz for a two count. Neckbreaker by Trish, Jazz fights back until Jacqueline gets the tag.

Hotshot by Jacqueline, O Connor Roll for a two count. DDT by Jacqueline and Molly makes the save. Jacqueline clubs Molly, Jazz takes down Jacqueline for a single leg Boston crab, Jacqueline crawls and crawls but Jazz drags her back for The STF. Trish saves Jacqueline, Jacqueline and Trish clothesline their opponents. Molly pairs off with Jacqueline, dosey doe spot with the faces reversing into a double springboard bulldog. Trish and Jacqueline walk away with the win.

Good women’s match, 2002 was looking a hell of a lot different than the previous few years. Trish was slowly turning into an awesome babyface, Molly, Jazz and Jacqueline can all work, it is tremendous and I am looking forward to all the way. The match was fun, it was not sloppy and everyone got to look good in the process. Bring it on!

Winners: Trish & Jacqueline over Jazz & Molly via Double Stratusfaction!

X-Pac vs Bradshaw

Bradshaw was being elevated to his association with Stone Cold Steve Austin and their battle against The NWO. X-Pac comes to the ring in a Kane mask and wielding nunchucks. X-Pac exposes a middle turnbuckle before the match starts, lock-up and Bradshaw tosses off X-Pac. Side headlock by X-Pac, hard knock down by Bradshaw. X-Pac rakes the eyes and pays for it with a huge big boot. Bradshaw rams X-Pac into the corner, hard Irish whip and big back body drop. Bradshaw misses a corner clothesline, kicks to the head by X-Pac. X-Pac attempts a spinning heel kick, Bradshaw catches X-Pac mid-flight and throws X-Pac to the ground. Irish whip by Bradshaw goes wrong as X-Pac targets the leg.

X-Pac rams Bradshaw into the exposed turnbuckle, opening up Bradshaw. X-Pac targets the knee and uses closed fists to beat down Bradshaw. Spinning heel kick by X-Pac, Bradshaw is covered in blood as X-Pac continues chopping and kicking Bradshaw. Nasty boot to the face, choke by X-Pac. Bradshaw attempts a comeback but X-Pac pokes the eyes and begins the ten punch in the corner. Bradshaw turns the tide with a massive powerbomb. Bradshaw smacks around X-Pac with right hands and clotheslines. Powerslam for a two count, hangman’s neckbreaker by Bradshaw. Bradshaw climbs to the top rope, diving shoulder block.

Cover and X-Pac gets a two count, X-Pac signals for a top rope move, Bradshaw catches X-Pac and Bradshaw nails the fallaway slam. Hall sprints down to ringside, Hall distracts Bradshaw but Bradshaw catches X-Pac with a big boot. Hall is persistent and attracts Bradshaw for a nunchuck shot, Bradshaw survives the shot by kicking out at two. X-Pac misses the bronco buster, Clothesline From Hell hits Scott Hall and X-Pac ducks.

Low blow and an X-Factor, X-Pac steals a win in what was a fairly standard match, they worked hard and I am surprised Bradshaw would bleed on a Uk pay per view but X-Pac opened up that wound. The NWO would make a pay per view appearance at Judgement Day and would not make it to Vengeance two months later as the group would fall apart. Group was doomed from the beginning to take this as a high point in their 2002 run.

Winner: X-Pac over Bradshaw via low blow & an X-Factor!

Undertaker Promo

Undertaker loves beating the shit out of people, Triple H is his next victim so it is not looking good for The Cerebral Assassin. Tonnes of What chnats during the promo to the point where it’s getting on my nerves.

(WWF Hardcore Championship Match) Steven Richards © vs Booker T

Booker T has been a disappointment since his feud with The Rock ended, Booker T feuded with Edge over a Japanese shampoo commercial but this could mark a turnaround for Booker as Booker is clearly the babyface in this match. Richards won the championship thanks to a Jazz assist so Richards is on cloud nine.

Lock-up and armdrag by Richards, another lock-up with Booker pushing back Richards, kicks in the corner by Booker T. Booker pulls out a tonne of trash cans and plates while Richards throws them out of the ring. Richards believes himself to be king of the ring yet Booker has other plans which include smacking the champion with a metal tray. Booker tosses Richard to the floor and smashes a broom across Richard’s back. Richards begs for mercy in the ring, eye poke by Richards. Massive chops and right hands, Booker turns the tide with a massive sidekick. Vertical suplex by Booker T, trash can shot to the head of Richards. Harlem sidekick by Booker for a two count.

Richards battles back, chops before Booker reverses an Irish whip and eats a flapjack. Booker rams Richards’ head into the turnbuckle before Richards nails a low blow to gain control. Tray to the head, cover by Richards and Richards gets a two count. Back body drop by Booker, Richards elevates Booker to the floor. Richards hurls a trash can at Booker and only gets a two count. Richards begins dropping elbows and mocking Booker T. Booker fights back but misses a Harlem Sidekick which leaves Booker straddling on the top rope. Metal tray shot by Richards. Richards applies a sleeper, Booker fights out. Scoop slam by Booker, Richards dropkicks a trash can into Booker’s face.

Richards wedges a trash can into a corner but Booker T Irish whips Richards into the trash can, flying forearm and spinebuster by Booker. Sidekick and Booker is on fire. Richards has a trash can placed on his head, missile dropkick from Booker and Richards kicks out at two and a half. Richards nails The Stevie Kick for a two count, Richards misses an elbow. Book-End by Booker T and we have a new champion. Celebrations do not last as Crash Holly rolls-up Booker T. Scissor Kick by Booker T on Crash and Booker is champion for the second time on this night.

Tommy Dreamer and Justin Credible are here, Dreamer has a table. Booker takes out Credible and Dreamer and looks to nail a Spinaroonie. Here comes Jazz, low blow and Richards botches putting Booker through the table the first time but on the second attempt, Richards regains the title.

Might be the most technical hardcore match I have ever seen, they were using sleepers and all. Honestly, Booker was way above this crap but I guess Vince did not see anything in Booker T. Booker gets a great reaction from the fans but Booker would go on to try and join The NWO which would mean the company almost failed to capitalize on Booker’s popularity by making him a heel when there was no reason for it.

Winner: Richards over Booker T via flapjack through a table!

The Hardy Boyz vs Brock Lesnar & Shawn Stasiak

Lesnar is The Next Big Thing, Lesnar destroyed The Hardy Boyz. Lesnar would have single victories over both Hardys by TKO. Shawn Stasiak makes it to pay per view in the WWF and it is not a multi-man match or a battle royal. I consider this achievement for Stasiak. If you do not recall, Stasiak has a planet where he believes he is on another world called Planet Stasiak where he can hear voices in his head. Yeah, it is not quite Beaver Cleavage but we are pretty close ladies and gentlemen.

Stasiak runs down to the ring to start the match, spinebuster by Stasiak on Jeff Hardy. Stasiak Irish whips Jeff and nails a sidewalk slam. Two count for Stasiak, Heyman is screaming at Stasiak to tag Brock and have this match over with in an instant. Jeff nails a jawbreaker and tags Matt, side effect on Stasiak. Poetry in Motion misses as Lesnar saves Stasiak. Lesnar tackles Matt and proceeds to victimize Matt with shoulder tackles. Matt tees off on Lesnar, boots to the face by Matt. Matt gets caught, series of backbreakers and powerslams by Lesnar.

Irish whip by Lesnar and a huge powerslam. Jeff is knocked to the floor by Lesnar, Matt tries battling back while Lesnar rakes Matt’s face across the top rope. Stalling vertical suplex by Lesnar, Lesnar smacks Matt into the corner  twice, Lesnar runs into the ringpost as Matt dodges. Stasiak tags himself into the match, Matt tags Jeff. Dropkicks to Stasiak, leg drop to the sacred parts. Whisper in The Wind for two, Lesnar is knocked off the apron. Twist of Fate by Matt and Swanton Bomb on Stasiak for the win.

Post-match, we are treated to two F-5s before Lesnar powerbombs Stasiak into oblivion. Decent tag match, Lesnar looks like a wrecking machine, Stasiak was surprisingly entertaining as his delusional character and The Hardy Boyz are always fun to watch, Stasiak takes the pin to protect Lesnar and Lesnar decimates everyone to remain strong.

Winners: The Hardy Boyz over Lesnar & Stasiak via Swanton Bomb!

(WWF European Championship Match) William Regal vs Spike Dudley ©

Home country man Regal puts down the crowd even though they love and adore Regal (Life is a cruel mistress sometimes, I forgive you though Regal). Spike Dudley will be playing the role of the small superstar Regal underestimates, Regal has fallen victim to Tajiri and even Crash Holly who would win the European Championship from Regal at the other UK pay per view Rebellion two years prior.

Big knockdown by Regal, stomp on the face by the challenger. Cravate lock and a knee to the face, left hands and forearms by Regal. Spike battles back, forearm and a dropkick by Spike. Regal begs for mercy yet Spike continues to destroy, headbutt to the lower area. Regal fights out of The Dudley Dog and Spike falls to a heap on the ground. Spike may have a fractured ankle after landing on his feet from a Dudley Dog. A trainer cuts open the boot of Spike as Regal wants to kill Spike. Spike is being helped out of the ring before Regal kicks Spike by the ankle and decides he wants to be champion.

Regal steps on the ankle before nailing a Tigerbomb, Regal goes for the cover and pulls up Spike at the count of two, Regal wants to hurt Spike. Regal picks up Spike and Spike cradles Regal for the win to retain his championship. Regal lays out Spike after the match with a massive Power of the Punch with the brass knuckles.

More of an angle than a match but why did Regal lose? If Regal takes advantage of Spike’s injury, roughs up Spike and wins due to Spike not being at 100%, is that not a better story to tell than Spike still winning despite his injury? Were they saving the title change for Raw or was it part of the whole wrestlers cannot win in their hometown/country?

Winner: Spike Dudley over William Regal via inside cradle!

Stone Cold Steve Austin vs Big Show

Austin had problems, Austin had been screwed out of an undisputed championship match by bad officiating from Ric Flair and The NWO are breathing down The Rattlesnake’s neck, becoming stronger as The Big Show has joined (or rather, re-joined) the group. Big Show would turn on Austin in a tag match on Raw and my thoughts on The Big Show in the WWF goes as follows: A huge disappointment who does not look motivated by any means.

To be fair, I have come to love Show in his later years in the WWE but in WCW and his run in the WWE before facing Brock Lesnar, Show never seemed to live up to the hype or deliver that big match. The match begins with a little controversy as Ric Flair makes himself the special guest referee for the match, could Flair be trying to mend broken bridges with Austin?

Austin and Show trade insults before the lock-up, Show overpowers Austin with ease. Second lock-up, Show shoves back Austin. Third lock-up and Austin is shoved down for a third time. We have a fat bastard chant for Show, Show continues to toy with Austin, elbow by Show knocks down Austin. Austin bails to the floor. Austin wants a test of strength before kicking Show over and over, Show cuts off Austin with a clothesline. Austin retreats to the corner, another lock-up with Show chest slapping Austin. Three shots to the chest of Austin, Irish whip by Show goes wrong as Austin kicks the legs of Show. Show goes down and there’s a massive shot to the groin. Austin continues to work the leg with elbows to Show’s knees.

Austin rams Show’s knee into the ringpost before stepping all over Show’s knee. Show gets back to his feet and headbutts Austin, Austin takes Show down with a tackle and applies a leg lock. Show rips at Austin’s head to escape the hold, chopblock by Austin. More leg work from The Rattlesnake, Show catches Austin for a scoop slam. Elbow drop by Show, more chest slaps. Show tosses Austin around the ring and steps on the back of Austin. Clubs to the back by Show, suplex by Show. Austin backs into the corner and kicks Show’s leg before Austin eats a back body drop from Show. Second back body drop by Show, Austin is in big trouble. Show steps on Austin’s back, huge clothesline by Show. Cover and a two for Show, Show stomps and elbows Austin. Austin fires up for a moment before Show clubs Austin and applies the bearhug.

Crowd comes alive for Austin, Austin bites the head of Show. Show headbutts Austin, another bearhug. Austin headbutts his way out of the hold, Show eats a boot to the face twice. Middle rope Lou Thesz Press by Austin, Show swats Austin away. Huge rights from Austin and Show counters with a big boot, Show clotheslines the referee by mistake. Stunner by Austin and here comes Hall and X-Pac. Hall and X-Pac drag out Flair, Flair runs off Hall and Nash. Show is on his feet, Chokeslam? No Austin fights out, big boot by Show. Show clubs Austin and headbutts The Rattlesnake. Kevin Nash is in the ring, Stunner on Nash and Stunner on Show, make it two Stunners on Show and Austin escapes with the win. Flair scares off Nash with a chair and Stunners Ric Flair once again.

A match that was very good with very little happening, Show and Austin take it easy in front of the crowd but still managed to hold onto them for the whole match. Might just have been the easiest payday in both men’s careers. Austin powdering and bailing was a little strange though, babyfaces are meant to powder. As for Show, it looks like Show was still no monster despite his heel turn and joining the NWO. Seems like a waste of time but The NWO were a waste of time in the WWF.

Winner: Stone Cold Steve Austin over Big Show via Stunner!

Triple H vs The Undertaker

Undertaker cost Triple H the undisputed championship as Undertaker thought it would be easier to beat Hulk Hogan. Sound strategy from The Deadman but Triple H was not happy, Triple H wanted revenge so we have this match between the number one contender and the former champion. It was certainly a weird time for Triple H who had been positioned as the top babyface at Wrestlemania yet by the next month’s pay per view. Triple H was no longer champion and out of the title picture.

Triple H and Taker exchange big shots, high knee by The Game and back body drop by Triple H. Huge clothesline and Taker is on the floor, Taker lures in The Game and rocks The Game’s world. Triple H regains control by shoving Taker into the ringpost, hard right hands by Triple H. Undertaker knocks down Triple H in the ring, shoulder thrusts by The Deadman. Taker looks for Old School but Triple H yanks Taker off the top rope, suplex by The Game. Elbow drop and a cover, Triple H gets a two count. Taker plays possum and throws Triple H to the floor, Triple H clotheslines Taker on the outside. Triple H hammers away at Taker on the apron, Taker blocks a right hand and hotshots The Game. Corner clothesline by Taker, Taker slides out to the floor and elbows Triple H across the throat.

Leg drop across Triple H’s neck, Triple H blocks a corner clothesline, right hands by The Game. Taker ducks a clothesline and goes after Triple H’s injured knee. The top rope breaks as Undertaker hits the rope hard, low blow by Taker. Taker slaps on a sleeper, Triple H escapes with a back suplex. Double knockdown in the middle of the ring, Taker misses a big boot and is straddled on the top rope. Neckbreaker by Triple H, right hands by The Game. Another neckbreaker by Triple H, spinebuster for a two count. Triple H looks for a Pedigree, Taker shoves off The Game and nails a big boot.

Triple H counters a chokeslam with a DDT, two count for Triple H. Facebuster by The Game but Undertaker nails The Chokeslam. Triple H kicks out at two, Taker strolls to the outside and grabs a chair. Triple H big boots the chair into Taker’s face for another two count. DDT by Taker, cover and a two count for Taker. Taker went for his dragon sleeper, Triple H nails a clothesline. Snake eyes by Taker but Triple H nails a high knee. Pedigree by Triple H and Triple H walks away with the win.

Another enjoyable match, they took it easy and the rope breaking made the moves a little more difficult to execute which led to little changes. Not the intense hate filled brawl you would think of when you hear the story of Taker running Triple H’s chances at being undisputed champion and that Triple H laid out Taker on Raw. From what I saw, this could be a good match and the WWF were building to a match between the two as Hulkamania was not running as wild as it did when Hogan first came back, there was a title change that was coming. Overall, a fine main event match that sent the fans home happy!

Winner: Triple H over Undertaker via Pedigree!

Insurrextion was a by the books UK pay per view, no title changes, the faces going over and matches were more fun than serious. The women’s match stands out as it was so different to the other tag matches that the women had done on pay per view, everyone could wrestle in that match and they showed that this women’s division on Raw meant business. The card was filled with matches that were not too long and easy on the eyes, there was nothing that was horrible on the card so, it was good but felt like an extended Raw in terms of quality. That wraps up another pay per view review, I hope you have had a great Christmas and a happy new year. I am signing off and remember, there is always another night!



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