WCW Clash of The Champions XI: Coastal Crush Review!

 

Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that acknowledges the greatness of El Dandy! It’s time for WCW’s Clash of The Champions XI: Coastal Crush! We are so close to the battle between Ric Flair and Sting at The Great American Bash but before we get there, we will have Ric Flair defending his NWA World Heavyweight Championship against The Junkyard Dog! We also have many squash matches coming up by the look of it but we have some nice tag team matches too! Let’s see if this is a home-run!

 

The Wide-Eyed Southern Boys vs The Fabulous Freebirds

A new tag team debuts for me at least we have The Wide-Eyed Southern Boys consisting of Tracy Smothers and Steve Armstrong. Freebirds jump the boys before the boys land flying forearms, big right hands by both. Stereo dropkicks and shoulder blocks, Freebirds are not happy. We settle down with Garvin and Smothers, Smothers runs into a knee from Garvin for two. Scoop slam from Garvin, tag to Hayes. Right hands from Hayes, Garvin lands some hits too before a flying crossbody from Armstrong saves the day. Freebirds have been rattled, Armstrong and Hayes to restart the action. Side headlock from Hayes, they trade counters before Hayes eats a clothesline. Armstrong climbs high but Garvin punches down Armstrong. Flying clothesline from Hayes, Garvin tosses Armstrong on the top rope for two.

 

Back-breaker from Garvin for two, eye-rake from Garvin. In comes Hayes who locks an arm-bar, Armstrong breaks free but is clubbed down and eats an elbow from Hayes for two. Arm-bar from Hayes, rights and chops from Hayes. Big scoop slam and strut, Hayes climbs high. Armstrong fights back, Hayes is yanked off the top rope. Tag to Smothers who comes in with a kick, back body-drop to Garvin. Right hands and elbows from Smothers, noggin-knocker. We have a brawl, O’Connor roll on Garvin. Hayes comes in with a clothesline, Garvin whips Smothers. Boot and knee to the head from Garvin, cover from Garvin but Armstrong lands a diving headbutt on Garvin for the wi.

 

Decent little tag team match, Freebirds put over the two youngsters with a nice shine before we get down to the goods, not convinced on Armstrong just yet but I will give him a pass. As far as cheesy heels go, Hayes is one of my favourites to do so and his performance in this match is fun. Not a bad way to kick us off boys and girls.

 

Winners: The Wide-Eyed Southern Boys over The Fabulous Freebirds via Diving Headbutt!

 

Bam Bam Bigelow W/ Sir Oliver Humperdink vs Tommy Rich

Squash time! Bigelow in his tank-top is an awful look, Rich uses his speed to avoid Bigelow. The punches just annoy Bigelow more than anything else, Bigelow is getting angry now. Rich avoids another right hand, Bigelow is drilled again but does not go down. Lock-up, Rich works the arm. Elbows to the arm, headbutt from Rich. Bigelow whips Rich and lands a headbutt, here we go. Rich comes with a schoolboy for two, ten punches in the corner. Bigelow counters with an inverted atomic drop. Military press slam from Bigelow, two-handed choke from Bigelow. Bigelow is disqualified for choking Rich.

 

Rich does not do the J-O-B for Bigelow? Are you crazy? What kind of finish is that? Bigelow must not have been staying around for long in WCW, that’s the only reason I can think for not letting Bigelow destroy Wildfire.

 

Winner: Tommy Rich over Bam Bam Bigelow via DQ!

 

The Samoan Swat-Team vs Captain Mike Rotunda & Tom Zenk

Where is Pillman? Must I watch Rotunda as a babyface again? Rotunda and Fatu to start, hip-toss by Fatu. Kick by Rotunda, hip-toss and dropkick by Rotunda. Rotunda works the arm and tags in Zenk, Fatu rakes the eyes and in comes Tama who eats a dropkick and rolls to the outside. Tama’s arm is worked by Rotunda, Tama eats a flying crossbody for two. Fatu lands a boot to the head for two as he swapped places with Tama. Tag to Tama, double clothesline that rocks Rotunda. Tama and Fatu batter Rotunda, superkick from Fatu. Shoulder-claw from from Fatu, Rotunda escapes the hold but eats a clothesline for his resilience. Tama scoop slams Rotunda on the outside, another shoulder-claw. Elbow from Tama, Tama knocks down Zenk. Rotunda lands a double clothesline on The Samoans, tag to Zenk.

 

Dropkick on Tama and Fatu by Zenk, superkicks all around. Noggin-knocker does not work, double headbutts from The Samoans. Samoan Drop on Zenk, middle rope splash by Fatu but they celebrate early. Rotunda is selling on the floor, small package by the possum-playing Rotunda for the win.

 

The makeshift team beat The Samoans? You have to be joking me? Nope that really happened, WCW can be a confusing place at times. I am still not sold on Zenk, very average while Rotunda is Rotunda. Weird booking decision for me.

 

Winners: Mike Rotunda & Tom Zenk over The Samoan Swat-Team via Small Package!

 

Mean Mark Callous W/ Paul E. Dangerously vs Flyin’ Brian Pillman

Callous attacks Pillman from behind, clubbing blows by the bigger and badder Callous. Throat thrust before Pillman leaps over Callous and lands a dropkick, Pillman ramps Callous off the buckle before Callous elbows down Pillman. Boot from the apron to the guardrail from Callous, Pillman is in serious trouble. Irish whip but Pillman escapes the sidewalk slam. Crucifix is blocked as Callous rams Pillman into the buckle, scoop slam from Callous. Massive elbow drop from Callous, snap-mare into a reverse chin-lock from Callous. Pillman fires up, Callous lands a big clothesline to take him down. Two for Callous, Pillman fires up but Callous continues to hurt the big man. Those chops sting Callous, Callous decides it is time for a sidewalk slam.

 

Two for Callous, reverse chin-lock. Pillman is whipped to the buckle, Callous misses an elbow. Chops to the big man, powerslam from Callous. Pillman dodges the leg drop, another huge chop. Dropkick staggers Callous, Pillman is sent over the top but skins the cat. Missile dropkick by Pillman, Dangerously is dropkicked to the floor. Callous sends Pillman to the buckle, middle rope crossbody is blocked and Callous lands a stun-gun for the win.

 

Well they botch the finish which is always a shame, I am a little confused why they would put Pillman in there with Callous, Pillman is a rising star and this seems like such an odd step to put Pillman as a singles wrestler and lose to giants in the ring like Callous. Anyways, an ok match but an odd booking decision from WCW.

 

Winners: Mean Mark Callous over Flyin’ Brian Pillman via Stun-Gun!

 

(NWA United States Tag Team Championship Match) The Midnight Express © W/ Jim Cornette vs The Rock “N” Roll Express

This will be good, the review could end there really. Gibson and Eaton to start, to the ropes we go and Eaton gives a clean break. Lock-up, Gibson works the arm but we have another clean break. Lock-up, arm-drag from Gibson. Make it double, another lock-up. Shoulder block by Eaton, hip-toss and head-scissors from Gibson. Eaton grabs the arm and a tag to Lane, Gibson escapes the corner. Shoulder block by Gibson, Lane lands his karate kicks to Gibson. Gibson lands his enzuigiri, Lane is not happy with these events. Gibson tags in Morton, Gibson lands a shot to rock Lane.

 

Lock-up, shoulder block by Morton. Hip-toss too, Lane is down. Lane brings Morton to the corner, right hand from Lane. Whip to the buckle, Morton dodges the elbow and lands a back body-drop. Kick by Lane and tag to Eaton who runs into an arm-drag. Arm-bar from Morton, Eaton grabs the hair. Elbow in the ropes and mean right hand by Eaton, Morton slides through the legs and lands a dropkick. Hurricanrana from Morton, in comes Lane. Arm-drag into an arm-bar, Gibson works the arm now. Lane shoves off Gibson, Gibson lands an atomic drop with The Midnight Express banging heads. Drop toehold into a front chancery by Lane, Gibson slips out and works the head of Lane. In comes Morton with a schoolboy, arm-drag before Lane rakes the eyes. Eaton comes in and rocks Morton’s world with right hands.

 

Morton escapes the superplex, O’Connor roll but Lane comes in and rams Morton into the buckle hard. Lane takes down Morton and Gibson eats a double back body-drop, Morton & Gibson land pins on The Midnight for a close two. Eaton wants to talk strategy with Cornette, Eaton drags Morton to the corner. Lane eats a hip-toss, hurricanrana is countered as Eaton brings Morton crashing to the mat. Twisting suplex from Eaton, tag to Lane. Face-stretch from Lane, snap-mare and elbow drop combination. Two for Eaton, Eaton misses a corner splash. Morton tags in Gibson, right hands all around.  Gut-shot and knee-lift. Lane whips Gibson to the buckle, flying clothesline by Gibson. Morton and Eaton go to the floor, Gibson has the leg of Lane. Eaton is hurled onto the guardrail, Lane shoves Gibson into Morton. Sleeper from Gibson, Cornette is on the apron while Eaton lands a diving axe handle for the close two.

 

Everyone is brawling in the ring, double dropkick to Eaton but Lane stops the referee from counting the three in the match. Double back body drop to Eaton, double clotheslines to Lane and Eaton.

 

Wow, one of the lamer matches that I have seen from these two. Blown spots and an awkward finish make this one of the worst tag matches that I have seen from these two teams who are usually stellar in terms of enjoyable tag team wrestling, I cannot believe you are doing this to me WCW.

 

Winners: Rock “N” Roll Express over The Midnight Express via DQ!

 

Barry Windham vs Doug Furnas

The return of Windham to my screen, Windham is back from the WWF. Furnas starts with a shoulder block, victory roll for two and another shoulder block. Windham is irate on the floor, Windham lands a massive right. Whip to the buckle, Furnas flips over Windham and military presses Windham. Ten punches in the corner and massive clothesline for two, Windham is begging off from Furnas who lands disgusting chops. Whip to the buckle but Furnas eats a knee and a clothesline. Clothesline and suplex from Windham for two, reverse chin-lock from Windham. Atomic drop from Windham, Furnas sends Windham into the mat with a face-buster. Belly to belly suplex from Furnas for two, powerslam for two. Back body-drop, dropkick sends Windham over the top and to the floor. Windham flips out of a suplex and lands a belly to back suplex with his feet on the ropes for the win.

 

Not bad, Furnas was always a tag team wrestler for me and his short-comings are evident as a singles wrestler, just does not have what you need to get it done alone. Glad to have Windham back in there, wanted to see more of Windham against Luger and Sting so he can really shine.

 

Winner: Barry Windham over Doug Furnas via Belly to Back Suplex!

 

Lex Luger vs Sid Vicious W/ Ole Anderson

This worries me, Luger jumps in and cracks Ole Anderson before Sid cracks Luger. Luger lands a clothesline as Sid was talking to Anderson. Well that is one way to get out of a difficult position but really Sid pinned like that? Wow!

 

Winner: Lex Luger over Sid Vicious via Clothesline!

 

(NWA World Tag Team Championship Match) The Steiner Brothers vs Doom © W/ Teddy Long

Rematch for the championships that many feel Doom stole from The Steiners at the previous PPV, Simmons and Scott to start. Flipping powerslams from Scott, crowd loses their collective minds. Simmons backs Scott to the corner, headbutts from Simmons. Whip to the buckle reversed by Scott, clothesline to the back of the head. In comes Reed, Reed pushes Scott to the ropes. Clubbing blows from Reed, shoulder block from Scott with nothing happening. Reed leapfrogs Scott, backslide from Scott for two. Scoop slam from Scott, Reed tags in Simmons. Rick wants in the match, Simmons is cautious to lock up with Rick. Simmons slaps Rick, whip to the buckle. Belly to belly is blocked, Simmons is lifted high with a belly to belly suplex.

 

Reed comes in now, knee and clubbing blows from Reed. Hip-toss does not work, Steinerline from Rick. Scoop slam, Reed rolls to the apron. They lock-up again, eye-rake from Reed. Rick slips out of a slam, O’Connor roll for two. Reed brings Rick to the corner, Rick brawls his way out of the corner. Reed dodges the clothesline, Simmons ducks down and nails Rick. Scoop slam and stomps from Doom, Scott wants into this match bad. Swinging neck-breaker from Reed for two, Rick barely hangs on as Simmons chokes one of the challengers. Irish whip but Simmons ducked the head, big boot from Rick. In comes Reed who climbs high and lands a diving axe handle. Reed provokes Scott again, Rick is tossed over the top rope to the floor. Simmons sends Rick into the ring-post, Rick fires back with right hands but lowers his head off an Irish whip. Scoop slam from Reed, butterfly suplex from Reed.

 

Reed climbs high for a middle rope elbow drop, reverse chin-lock from Reed. Reed misses a high knee in the corner, diving axe handle from Rick. In comes Scott, dropkick from Scott to both members of Doom. Powerslam on Simmons, Reed is bounced on the apron. The match breaks down with everyone in the ring, Teddy Long gives Reed an object. Superplex by Scott, Reed drilled Scott with the foreign object and Doom retain the championships!

 

Solid tag team match, not the length or as exciting as some of their previous matches but it is serviceable for sure and better than a lot of what I had to see so far on this show. Happy to see these two tear it up when given the proper amount of time again on PPV!

 

Winners: Doom over The Steiner Brothers via Foreign Object To The Head!

 

Paul Orndorff vs Arn Anderson

What is this match? Orndorff taking on one of The Horsemen? Orndorff grabs a side headlock, Anderson tries a monkey flip and has his faced stepped on by Mr. Wonderful. Anderson is not happy, hammerlock from Orndorff. Anderson makes it to the ropes, clean break. Another side headlock from Orndorff, backslide from Orndorff for two. Anderson and Orndorff shove one another, right hands by Orndorff. Sleeper from Orndorff, sleeper from Anderson. Anderson is rammed into the buckle for two, headbutt from Anderson. Gut shots from Anderson, Orndorff trips up Anderson and applies the figure four. Anderson makes it to the ropes as Orndorff wraps that leg around the ring-post, Anderson is begging for mercy as Orndorff steps all over the leg.

 

Right hands, Irish whip but Anderson reverses and lands that Spinebuster to drill Orndorff. Left hands from Anderson, sunset flip from Orndorff but Anderson survives and drills Orndorff with a right hand. Knee to the head by Anderson, choke with the ropes by Anderson. Abdominal stretch from Anderson, Anderson uses the ropes for leverage. Reverse chin-lock from Anderson, Orndorff escapes but cannot take control before Anderson misses a left hand. Atomic drop from Orndorff but Anderson bounces off the buckle and smacks his head off Orndorff. Orndorff smashes Anderson with stinging jabs and a roundhouse right. Ten punches in the corner, inverted atomic drop from Anderson.

 

Side headlock from Anderson, flying shoulder tackle and elbow drop from Orndorff. Repeated elbows from Orndorff, knee-lift rocks the life out of Anderson. A big elbow drop connects to the face of Anderson for two, whip to the buckle and a clothesline by Orndorff. Anderson brings up the knees to block the middle rope splash. Small package but Orndorff reverses the hold and wins the match.

 

Crowd is into it, it is an alright match. Orndorff is not lighting my world on fire but I am happy to see Anderson bumping around my screen again, Orndorff, El Gigante and JYD is quite the team, this company continues to confuse me during this year.

 

Winner: Paul Orndorff over Arn Anderson via Small Package!

 

(NWA World Heavyweight Championship Match) Ric Flair © vs Junkyard Dog

Flair taking on JYD, it is not the mid-80s and Flair is not touring Mid-South but this is WCW in 1990. This starts with trash-talk before JYD slaps down Flair, Flair is a little rocked by The Dog. Flair is now realizing what kind of fight this will be, JYD shoves down Flair. Make it twice, side headlock from JYD. Shoulder block and headbutt from JYD which rocks Flair. Right hand sends Flair to the ramp, chops do not work on JYD. Rights and lefts, ten punches from Dog. Whip to the buckle and clothesline, Flair is getting destroyed here. Eye-poke from Flair, right hands and chops from the champion. Knee-drop from Flair, JYD no-sells the knee. Flair is concerned, Flair backs up to the corner.

 

Flair chops and chops, nothing as JYD lands his punches and staggers Flair who flops down. Whip to the buckle and a back body-drop, Flair begs for mercy. Eye-poke and hot-shot from The Nature Boy, Flair grabs a chair as Ole Anderson distracts the referee. Chair to the head, no effect on JYD. Ten punches from JYD, whip to the buckle and a Flair flip. Diving axe handle does not work for Flair, Ole Anderson is knocked down by JYD. A knee in the spine from Flair, Flair climbs high. JYD yanks Flair down to the mat, headbutt and right hands from JYD. In comes Ole Anderson for the immediate DQ and we have The Horsemen in the ring attacking JYD. Big brawl to set us up for The GAB PPV.

 

Well it was brief and probably for the best but this was more of an angle than anything else, sometimes I am find with that but in a world championship match? Going six minutes before a DQ? Rough times

 

Winner: JYD over Ric Flair via DQ!

 

WCW’s Clash of The Champions XI: Coastal Crush is really poor from WCW, you have the squash matches and bigger matches that do not deliver whatsoever on the card. The opening match is fine establishing the new and fiery tag team in The Southern Boys, things take a down turn with Bigelow taking a DQ over Tommy Rich, the makeshift team of Rotunda and Zenk upsetting The Samoan Swat Team, a poor Windham match and a very average Anderson match against Orndorff. The Midnight and Rock “N” Roll have their worst match that I have ever seen them have and the main event is simply an angle. Only saving grace is Doom vs Steiners is fun but nowhere near good enough to save the show. I would skip this one entirely, feels like I wasted time watching a show where nothing happened. Thanks for reading and remember: there’s always another night!

 

NWA Starrcade 1985 Review!

 

Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that goes longer than a NJPW Main Event! It’s Starrcade 1985! We are getting into the thick of it now, Ric Flair vs Dusty Rhodes inside a steel cage, The Rock N Roll Express taking on The Koloffs and Magnum T.A vs Tully Blanchard. Big names galore all over the card and this might be the best Starrcade yet based off of the matches announced but will it deliver? That’s the key question so let’s get it on!

 

(NWA Mid-Atlantic Heavyweight Championship Match) Sam Houston vs Krusher Krushchev

 

What a name eh? Krusher Krushchev who would later become Smash and Repo Man against very popular babyface Sam Houston competing for a vacant championship. Dusty Rhodes had a dispute with then champion Buzz Tyler over money and thus, we have this situation upon us. Houston has been called young at least 4 times before they have even touched so I think I can tell what way this is going to go based off of that alone but I digress, Krusher throws down Houston with his power advantage.

 

Houston sends Krusher to the floor, right hands from Houston. Krusher begins to use his power to torture Houston, Krusher misses an elbow drop though. Back to square one with both men trading control, knees from Krusher. Houston escapes the scoop slam and pops Krusher in the face twice. Krusher is getting frustrated, side headlock from Houston. Krusher shoves off Houston, leap-frogs and drop-downs follow but Houston cannot toss the big man so Houston uses his legs to nail a headscissors. Krusher grabs at the hair, looking for a way to escape. Krusher puts Houston in the corner, Houston is climbing high to escape and lands a big right before leaping over Krusher and landing a big dropkick into an arm-drag with an arm-bar.

 

Krusher escapes and flapjacks Houston, the crowd is not happy about that at all. Krusher jaw-jacks with the fans, massive right hand for two. Military press slam from Krusher, Houston slides through the legs of Krusher but eats a right hand to the face. To the buckle we go, bearhug from Krusher. Houston escapes and kicks Krusher in the face, scoop slam from Krusher. Krusher climbs to the buckle, Houston lands a dropkick and right hands that have the big Russian in trouble.

 

Ten punches in the corner and an Irish whip to the corner, Running Bulldog from Sam Houston who thinks he has won, he did not see the foot of Krusher on the ropes, Russian Sickle decapitates Houston and the referee misses that Houston’s foot was on the ropes, what a twist!

 

These two will continue to feud it seems, fairly standard stuff though. Nothing particularly amazing here in this opening match and the announcers do not seem to pull any attention to the cheating ways of Krusher.

 

Winner: Krusher Krushchev over Sam Houston via Russian Sickle!

 

(Mexican Death Match) Ragin’ Bull vs Abdullah The Butcher W/ Paul Jones

 

Only way to win the match is climb a pol and grab the hat? Vince Russo be damned, two hardcore brawling specialists though. Hoping that Ragin’ Bull can offer something a little more in terms of story-telling after watching his match the year prior with Black Bart. Abdullah jumps Ragin’ Bull and Ragin’ Bull is bleeding already, fuck yes no messing around. Abdullah scrapes and bites and claws at the face of Ragin’ Bull. Ragin’ Bull starts firing back with boots and a monkey flip to Abdullah. Paul Jones is going insane at ring-side, Ragin’ Bull leaps off the top rope and cracks Abdullah in the head with his boot. Again and again, Ragin’ Bull cracks Abdullah in the head who is bleeding also. Abdullah battles back, catching Ragin’ Bull in the ribs and uses the boot on Ragin’ Bull.

 

Abdullah almost reaches the hat but Ragin’ Bull lands one hell of a low blow, both men are feeling the effects of this war. Ragin’ Bull is battering Abdullah with his other boot, Ragin’ Bull almost makes it to the top rope before Abdullah cracks Ragin’ Bull with the boot. Ragin’ Bull takes off his belt and starts whipping Abdullah, massive belt shot to the face.  Abdullah lands a throat-thrust, boot to the throat. Headbutt and massive elbow drop incoming, Ragin’ Bull musters up the strength to dodge the elbow drop. Flying clothesline from Ragin-Bull, Abdullah is only sitting up thanks to the ropes. Ragin’ Bull suplexes the massive Abdullah The Butcher! Ragin’ Bull was close but Abdullah stabs Ragin’ Bull with a foreign object, headbutt from Abdullah. Flying Burrito from Ragin’ Bull and a middle rope diving clothesline. Ragin’ Bull climbs high once more, Abdullah avoids the diving splash.

 

Abdullah waddles over to Ragin’ Bull, Irish whip to the buckle. Abdullah comes charging in but misses the spear, Ragin’ Bull sprints up that rope and grabs the sombrero, ending this match as Paul Jones freaks out!

 

Well having this sort of stipulation in what was called a Mexican Death Match is odd to me but they give you what you would expect, Ragin’ Bull is a bloody mess within less than 30 seconds, Abdullah and Ragin’ Bull beat the piss out of one another, it’s bloody and sloppy and looks like a train-wreck but I will be damned  if I didn’t enjoy this spectacle.

 

Winner: Ragin’ Bull Manny Fernandez over Abdullah The Butcher via Retrieving The Sombrero!

 

(Texas Bullrope Match) Cowboy Ron Vass vs Black Bart W/ JJ Dillon

 

If Bass wins, it’s five minutes alone with JJ Dillon. Black Bart and Bass are going to brawl, Bart is cracked with the bull-rope ten seconds in, I guess we are getting hardcore back to back. Bart is bleeding already, cowbell to the head does damage as always. Bas chokes Bart with the rope, Bart has been battered the entire match. Bart begins to brawl his way back in, Bass chokes him with his cowbell. Irish whip and a right hand, Bart slugs his way back into cracking Bass in the head. Bass is bleeding, Dillon winces as both men continue to batter one another. More cowbell shots over and over, Bass knocks out Bart with three right hands but somehow Bart kicks out, Bart comes back into the match with throat thrusts. Irish whip with both men banging heads, Bass clocks Bart eventually one more time and wins the match.

 

So we will continue the review as JJ Dillon jumps in immediately to attack Bass as it should be, Dillon takes off his shirt exposing his “physique” as it should be. Cowbell shots to the head over and over, I doubt they even hurt as this stage because I saw Bart and Bass clock each other at least 500 times. Dillon tries choking Bass, Bass powers up and Dillon shits himself. Dillon tries running, Dillon is pleading. Massive cowbell shot to the head, Dillon is bleeding now. Bass chokes Dillon who is on dream street, shot after shot with Dillon rocking back and forth. Bass cracks the referee by mistake though, Black Bart drops Bass with a piledriver and Dillon gets the pin.

 

Well if this is your big show, is this not the time and the place to pay-off your big angles? Would this not be the time for Bass to slaughter both and stand tall? Not that I cared too much, Bass vs Dillon was far more entertaining than the previous match with Bart and Bass just hitting one another time and time again. Don’t get me wrong, it can be done and I just saw it with Manny and Abdullah but I am going to get numb to it if it continues to be like this and unfortunately for Black Bart and Ron Bass, neither of them come close to the level of charisma or fan reaction that Ragin’ Bull Manny Fernandez has which leaves us with a rather boring affair.

 

Winner: Ron Bass over Black Bart via Cowbell To The Head!

 

Winner: JJ Dillon over Ron Bass via Piledriver From Black Bart!

 

The Barbarian W/ Paul Jones vs Superstar Billy Graham

 

No more kung-fu Billy Graham? Disappointing for sure, Barbarian is here and looking like an animal, no surprise there. We have an arm-wrestling contest to kick us off, Graham wins that contest before Paul Jones cracks Graham with his cane. Graham is bleeding, for fuck sake is everyone going to bleed on this card? Barbarian bites at the head of Graham, not a fun time for The Superstar. Graham comes back but Barbarian is too strong, Graham dodges the diving headbutt. Stomps to the head from Graham, Irish whip into the bearhug. Barbarian almost fades but Paul Jones attacks with the cane again. Graham grabs the cane and cracks Paul Jones, Barbarian eventually saves his manager.

 

Goodness gracious can we stop with everyone bleeding? I don’t think it means anything if everyone is bleeding on the card, for the hardcore matches ok I get it, it’s brawling and that is expected but must everyone bleed on this night? Anyways, it was alright, nothing has been awful on this show like the prior years. It has been quite watchable so far and it’s only going to get even better as we get to the more serious matches on the card.

 

Winner: Billy Graham over The Barbarian via DQ!

 

(NWA National Championship Match) Terry Taylor © vs Buddy Landel

 

Madness how I only see The Red Rooster when I look at Taylor but Taylor was quite good inside of that ring and had some very interesting angles during his tenure. Buddy Landel could be mistaken for a Ric Flair rip-off but Landel could work inside of that ring too, his demons would ultimately get the better of him though. Tremendous athletes who are young is the description of this match from Bob Caudle. Lock-up, Landel shoves Taylor to the corner. Taylor is fired up, Landel looks hesitant. The challenger complains about hair-pulling etc, slap from Landel which sees Taylor fire up with a slap. Landel stalls and stalls, lock-up again.

 

Wrist-lock from Landel who works that arm, Landel talks trash as Taylor looks for a way out of the hold. Arm-drag from the champion, Landel pushes Taylor to the ropes. Taylor blocks the punches and decks Landel, Landel has been rocked by this turn of events. Side headlock takedown from Landel, Taylor works the arm before Landel shoves Taylor to the corner. Massive chops and shots before an Irish whip to the opposite buckle, Taylor rocks Landel with a boot. Back body-drop, Taylor lands a knee-drop to the head for one. Wrist-lock from Taylor, Landel spins out and nails Taylor with a brutal forearm. Landel goes to work with stomps, right hand to the jaw. Jabs in the corner and chops from Landel, snap-mare into a rear chin-lock. Landel stops the comeback of Taylor with a massive clothesline, two for Landel.

 

Suplex is countered into a small package for two, Landel pops up and applies a camel clutch. Taylor shoves off Landel, Landel misses a right hand as Taylor fights back once more. Chops and a right hand, snap-mare and a face-walk. Suplex for two, right hand to the jaw from Taylor. Landel is bounced off the turnbuckle, Landel swings back at Taylor and down goes the referee. Referee is wiped out a second time because the first time was not enough, Dillon is on the apron. Landel is whipped into Dillon, forearm from Taylor. Taylor wants the superplex, Landel is not doing too well. Taylor went for the superplex but Dillon tripped his leg and Landel crushes the head of Taylor and secures the victory.

 

Solid match from these two, enjoyed the heelish antics of Landel in this match, had the routine nailed down to a tee while Taylor showed a lot of fire when given the chance, would have benefited from a little more action on the part of Taylor but maybe that’s why Landel is the man who went over, Landel seemed to have more to offer in this one. Finish was good, not sure why referee had to be obliterated twice but it is not all doom and gloom, an entertaining match for sure!

 

Winner: Buddy Landel over Terry Taylor via Shenanigans!

 

(NWA National Tag Team Championship Match) Ole & Arn Anderson © vs Billy Jack Haynes & Wahoo McDaniel

 

The Minnesota Wrecking Crew, Ole and Arn mixing it up against Wahoo and Billy Jack. Billy Jack and Arn to start, Arn is thrown back to the corner. Announcers hype up the full-nelson, nobody can escape it they say. Side headlock from Billy Jack, shoulder block and a military press slam. Arn is retreating, in comes Ole. Lock-up and these two big bears brawl to the ropes, Billy Jack out-fires Ole who is against the ropes. Ole is in the challengers’ corner and is whipped around, in comes Wahoo who chops everything in sight. Ole tags in Arn, Arn is cautious but ready to mix it up with Wahoo. Wahoo ducks the left and slaps on a side headlock, takedown from Wahoo. Arn reverses the hold, dragging Wahoo to his corner. In comes Ole who works the arm, no surprise there.

 

Boots to the ribs, Wahoo chops back at Ole. Ole tags Arn and leg-laces Wahoo who cannot escape, Arn works the arm. Billy Jack is trying to get the crowd involved, Arn continues wrenching the arm and stomping on it repeatedly. Hammerlock from Arn, Wahoo is firing up though. Ole comes in from the tag, more arm work from Ole. Massive stomps to the ribs and arms, scoop slam and elbow drop for two. Knee from Ole, tag to Arn. Billy Jack has had enough but the referee stops Billy Jack from coming in, Wahoo starts chopping with his one good arm. Ole comes in, Ole is trading with Wahoo but Wahoo rolls away and tags in Billy Jack. Rights and lefts, noggin knocker from Billy Jack. Coconut crush from Billy Jack on Arn, Wahoo chops out Ole.

 

Ole grabs Billy Jack illegally, Arn takes control before Billy Jack tags back in Wahoo. Irish whip and massive chop, Ole makes the save for the championships. Billy Jack and Ole might brawl but the referee stops it, Ole trips up Wahoo for a close two, Billy Jack is still in the ring. Wahoo chops at Arn, Ole drops Wahoo near the ropes and Ole holds down the legs of Wahoo allowing Arn to steal the win.

 

That was a little tough around the edges, The Andersons work the tag formula very well but I didn’t get my Billy Jack running wild moment, it seemed a little abrupt which was sad to see, thought we could have had a little more from this match. First time I have been disappointing on this card, a shame but we march on!

 

Winners: The Andersons over Billy Jack Haynes & Wahoo McDaniel via Roll-Up!

 

(NWA United States Championship Steel Cage I Quit Match) Tully Blanchard © vs Magnum T.A.

 

The match boys and girls, the one you are meant to know about when it comes to this card, Tully Blanchard one of the biggest dickheads to ever lace up his boots, a true heel who draws such hatred from every person in that crowd. Never would you ever mistakenly cheer this individual or admire his heel work because he was just that antagonizing while Magnum T.A. is the next big thing in wrestling, nobody has more fire than this man right here.  On top of all that, both men despise one another and it’s a damn steel cage I Quit match. Crowd is rampant before we even ring the bell, this is going to be a war.

 

Lock-up, Blanchard backs Magnum to the corner but Magnum sees the right hand coming, right hand floors Blanchard. Magnum is staring down Blanchard, it’s great stuff. Blanchard goes for the leg twice but Magnum sees the double-leg coming. Tully goes to the eyes and starts laying in the shots, rib shots to Magnum. Magnum fires back though, Tully is not going to win that war. Tully is in between the cage wall and the ropes, Magnum is teeing off now. Clubbing shots to the throat, Tully blocks the cage and a low shot saves the champion from tasting the cage wall. Axe handle from Tully who delivers an elbow to the head, Magnum meets the steel cage hard. Camel clutch from Tully, Magnum is bleeding lightly. Magnum is coming up though, Tully goes to the ribs with a knee.  Irish whip but Magnum drops Tully on the top rope with a military press, massive right from Magnum. Boot and kicks from Tully, the champion is rocked by rights from the challenger. Tully pulls Magnum into the cage, Tully dives onto Magnum with the microphone but Magnum will not quit.  Knees from Tully, Magnum sends Tully into the cage wall. Hammerlock throw from Magnum, Magnum starts going after the arm of Tully which is bleeding. Low headbutt from Tully, both men are on their knees dishing out the shots.

 

Magnum bites the arm of Tully, anything to get his arch-rival to utter those words. Tully bites back at the head of Magnum, kicks from Tully. Tully stabs Magnum with the microphone. Diving axe handle from the champion, Tully has the microphone, pleading with Magnum to quit. Magnum will not quit, Magnum avoids the elbow drop from Tully. Right hand and forearm shot from Magnum, Magnum tries to choke Tully with the microphone but Tully will not quit. Another shot with the microphone, Tully continues to refuse to quit. Tully claws at the eyes of Magnum, Magnum claws at the face of Tully. Tully rakes the eyes, ten punches in the corner before Tully lands the inverted atomic drop and down goes the challenger. Magnum says no, Tully drops more elbows and punishment.

 

Tully has a chair now, Tully breaks apart the chair looking to drive a stake into the head of Magnum but Magnum sees the stake coming, Magnum blocks and fights with all his strength to stop the evil Tully from stabbing him in the head. Magnum kicks off Tully, Magnum dives for it and stabs the head of Tully, Tully screams out in pain and Tully screams I Quit! We have a winner, Magnum T.A. is the new United States Champion, Babydoll looks on in horror as Magnum walks away victorious!

 

Now that’s a hardcore match right here, you can feel the hatred between these two the second the bell rings, these two want to take one another apart in the most brutal ways possible, Tully is so good at being completely unlikeable, the guy is slimy and disgusting and you are on the edge of your seat waiting for him to experience pain at the hands of Magnum, they waste no time in brawling before the cage is introduced, they are stabbing one another, torturing one another and battering one another all around the ring. Magnum’s fire is on full-display here, fans love him and he is a star waiting to happen and that ending is top-notch stuff. Tully who is utterly frustrated by the resilience shown by Magnum snaps and decides I am going to stab this son of a bitch only for Tully to fall victim to the very weapon he introduced and a wonderfully violent moment takes place with Magnum standing over Tully who screams I Quit. Excellent wrestling match, loved it!

 

Winner: Magnum T.A over Tully Blanchard!

 

Jimmy Valiant & Atlanta Lively W/ Big Mama vs The Midnight Express W/ Jim Cornette

 

Jimmy Valiant is over, a fact of life that does not matter what year it is. However, what is going on here at all? Midnight Express all in tuxedos while Ronnie Garvin is dressed in drag as Atlanta Lively, who is Big Mama? I wish I had a bit more context to this one but I am stumped unfortunately, the heels try to jump the babyfaces and it backfires big time as Atlanta batters Bobby, choking and theatrics ensue. Valiant is beating up Loverboy with a chair, Bobby kicks back at Atlanta. Loverboy has got colour brother, I think Bobby is opened up too. Lots of punching going on with both members of Midnight Express bleeding all over the ring, Sleeper from Valiant. Dennis and Bobby pull out powder and a foreign object, Valiant is bleeding now I believe. Lots of powder being thrown, Dennis whips Valiant while Lively is being stripped.

 

What in the Lord’s name am I watching here? Valiant saves Lively, there is more brawling going on, I have never seen so much blood in a comedy match in my life. Beautiful Bobby has been stripped while Lively attacks Dennis. Lively is being attacked now, Cornette cracks Lively in the head. Bobby lands a diving axe handle, Valiant cannot make it into the ring. Valiant cannot make an impact on the match, Big Mama continues to cheer on Valiant. Valiant fires up and goes after Bobby and Dennis, right hands before a double clothesline takes down Valiant. Lively saves Valiant with a huge right hand for the win!

 

Garbage match that probably would have been passable as a buffer to the man event but this positioning was rather poor and the amount of blood for a comedy match like that is just overkill at this point.

 

Winners: Atlanta Lively & Jimmy Valiant over The Midnight Express via Right Hand!

 

(NWA World Tag Team Championship Match) The Koloffs © vs The Rock “N” Roll Express W/ Don Kernodle

 

Can you say popular babyface tag team? The Rock “N” Roll Express challenge The Koloffs, Kernodle is in the corner of the challengers. Another cage match after Magnum vs Tully is a bad idea but it’s important to remember that this event was held in two different cities so not all in the one location on the same card did the people have to see the cage matches.

 

Ricky and Nikita to start, Ricky throws down Ricky with ease. Shoulder block does not work for Ricky but a dropkick sure does, we reset with both men staring one another down. Boot and clubbing blows from Nikita, Ricky meets the cage. Ricky is dragged to the champions’ corner, Ivan is too slow for the quicker Ricky. Flying crossbody from Ricky, Ivan drops Ricky on the top rope for a close two. Robert is in, dropkick from Gibson. Knee drop from Gibson for two, side headlock and a tag to Ricky. Snap-mare into a fist drop from Morton, two for Morton. Another quick tag, schoolboy from Gibson for two. Tag to Morton, tag to Gibson who lands an elbow to the back of the head. Ivan rakes the eyes of Gibson, they go to the ropes.

 

Clubbing blow from Ivan, Gibson shoves Ivan into the cage. Morton climbs high, diving fist-drop by Morton. Ivan meets the cage again, Morton climbs high with a diving axe handle for two. Gibson comes in but has his eyes raked once more, Nikita comes in and clubs Gibson but Gibson trips up the monster. Nikita returns with a mean flapjack into the cage, Ivan is a bloody mess and I imagine now that Gibson has donned the crimson mask. Ivan lands a diving axe handle to the head of Gibson. Gibson meets the cage again, elbow drop from Ivan for two. Nikita comes in and bites the head of Gibson, scoop slam from Nikita. Ivan comes off the top rope again with a fist to the head, Morton saves the match with a boot to the head.

 

Morton has to watch on as the champions torture Gibson, snap-mare into a leg drop for two. Gibson avoids the second leg drop but Nikita is in fast, rear chin-lock from Nikita. Ivan batters Gibson with right hands, both Russians decimate Gibson to cut off the fiery babyface. Morton continues to save his partner, Ivan is dealing out the right hands, Gibson slips through the legs and dropkicks Ivan but the referee is down too. Russian Sickle to the head of Morton, shoulder tackle on Gibson. Ivan is on top but the referee is rocked, Gibson tags in Morton. Ivan back-drops Gibson but Morton comes in with the O’Connor Roll for the win. The heels get their heat back after the match, decimating the new champions.

 

Very good match but very hard to top what I saw previously in the night in that cage, Morton and Gibson are ridiculously popular and make for the perfect foil for the big nasty Russians but nothing inside of that cage was going to come close to Magnum and Tully unfortunately so maybe on a different night, they could have stolen the show but it was not meant to be on this night. Fun tag team match but overshadowed!

 

Winners: Rock “N” Roll Express over The Koloffs via O’Connor Roll!

 

(NWA World Heavyweight Championship Match) Ric Flair © vs Dusty Rhodes

 

These two men main-evented the previous year’s Starrcade and it did not deliver with a finish that had me scratching my head considering it was for excessive blood loss/injury when everyone on the card almost bled, it seemed like overkill. Yet, maybe they needed more time, maybe they wanted to spin a finer story well tonight is the night. Put up or shut up, Nature Boy vs The American Dream II for the richest prize in the game.

 

Intense stare-down to begin, cautious approach from both challenger and champion. Lock-up, Flair has Rhodes in the corner. Flair goes to trade punches, bad ideas as Rhodes jabs his way and knocks down the champion. Elbow and big thrust sends champion to the floor. Flair hops over the guardrail for his breather, re-evaluation time for The Nature Boy. Knees from Flair, right hand to the face but Rhodes lands elbows to get back into the match. Shoulder block and elbow from Rhodes, Flair is begging off and powders once more. Flair steps in for round three, Rhodes is confident at this point. Lock-up and side headlock from Flair, Rhodes counters for a hammerlock. Flair runs around the ring before going to the mat, Flair makes it to the ropes before attacking the leg of Rhodes. Rhodes sells it, a point of weakness for sure.

 

Flair goes low and starts chopping, Rhodes eats a mean right to the head. Snap-mare into that knee-drop which finds the mark, Rhodes is in trouble. Barely one for Flair, Rhodes takes one kick to the leg and jumps over the guardrail, perhaps a little exaggerated but maybe Flair is as deadly as Jose Aldo with those lethal leg-kicks. Flair tries attacking Rhodes who re-entering the ring but Rhodes blocks and delivers massive elbows to the back of the head, Rhodes stomps the leg of Flair. The fans love that, Rhodes giving Flair a taste of his own medicine. Massive elbow to the knee from Flair, Rhodes asks the fans if they want to see and delivers a big elbow to the knee but Flair rakes the eyes. Flair sells the leg, Flair wants a suplex but the leg gives out on the champion.

 

Rhodes suplexes Flair, Rhodes delivers another elbow to the leg. Flair slaps on a sleeper to take out Rhodes but Rhodes runs Flair to the corner. Rhodes slips out of the ring and grabs Flair’s foot, Flair begs for mercy as Rhodes wraps that leg around the ring-post. Elbow to the ankle from Rhodes, Rhodes chops Flair and with a snap-mare, misses a crucial elbow drop. Flair decides to climb to the top rope, bad idea for the champion. Figure four is blocked by Flair, Rhodes is kicked off and clutches his knee. Chop and Figure Four does not connect for Flair, Flair is persistent though and tries again. Flair decides to work the leg first, Rhodes clubs at Flair with a giant headbutt. Irish whip with Flair flip to the floor, Rhodes smacks Flair off the guardrail.

 

Flair is bleeding, all drama from that has been lost on me unfortunately. Flair is dragged into the ring, chops from the challenger. Flair kicks low and sends Rhodes to the floor, Rhodes decides to climb to the top rope. Diving crossbody for two, fans are in uproar as the referee was dealing with something. Rhodes lands right hands to the head of Flair, Flair wriggles free. Bionic Elbow decks Flair, ten punches in the corner from Rhodes. Flair flop to the mat, Rhodes is feeling the energy in the building at this point.  Jabs stagger Flair, Flair is backing away. Flair flip to the apron, Flair tries an axe handle but Rhodes catches Flair with a gut shot. Rhodes tries a kick to the gut, Flair dodges and Rhodes hurts his aggravated knee. Flair begins to work, Flair drops all his weight down on the leg.

 

Knee-drop on the ankle, Flair lands a right-hand to the face. Figure Four in the middle of the ring, Rhodes is in terrible pain. Rhodes fights and fights, reversing the pressure and forcing The Nature Boy to release the hold. Flair chops at Rhodes, Rhodes is firing up now. Right hands and elbows from Rhodes, flying clothesline from Rhodes. Flair kicks out at two, Rhodes pulls Flair into the corner but takes out the referee by mistake. Rhodes and Flair scramble, Bionic Elbow and a figure four from Rhodes. Arn Anderson and Ole Anderson are here, a giant knee flattens Rhodes. 1….2… Rhodes kicks out! Scoop slam attempt by Flair but Rhodes counters into a small package, 1..2….3!

 

Lots of fun here in this main event, it may not be the first time that Rhodes has been champion but you might not hear a louder reaction that this moment right here, two legends at the top of their game. Working the fans and making us believe that wrestling is real ladies and gentlemen. Loved the pacing, loved the intensity they brought and loved the little things like Rhodes tweaking his knee and Rhodes going after Flair’s leg. Thought the ending was a little abrupt but take nothing away from this match, it was a great way to cap off the PPV and it left room for a rematch if need be, quality right here.

 

Winner: Dusty Rhodes over Ric Flair via Small Package!

 

Starrcade 1985 was a fun show with some great matches on the card. It could be the fact that I had watched two prior Starrcades back to back before watching this but this was miles better than both. The only worthwhile match I can pull from the other two for me was Piper vs Valentine, this has a main event that lives up to the hype, a career-defining cage match between Magnum T.A. and Tully Blanchard and the undercard is not all that bad, I think I only groaned when two matches came on and they went too long and had no business on the card all things considered. I also want to note that commentary was bizarre on this show, you had I want to say minutes of silence before Tony or Bob would chime in, really took me out of the experience because I didn’t have those commentators filling in the blanks and providing that extra depth and drama but this was the best Starrcade I have seen thus far and the talent is red-hot, the crowds are red-hot and I can only imagine what is coming next in the year of 1986! Thanks for reading and remember: there’s always another night!