Sunday 20 May 2018

WWE One Night Stand 2007 Review

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Hello and welcome to another riveting edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that is as real as Cena’s breakup with Nikki Bella (It’s a work brother). WWE’s One Night Stand 2007, no longer an ECW-themed reunion show but rather a pay per view that pays homage to ECW through exciting and dangerous stipulation matches. The big matches on the card include John Cena facing The Great Khali in a Falls Count Anywhere Match for the WWE Championship while Edge defends his World Heavyweight Championship against Batista inside of a steel cage. Stretcher matches, table matches and much, much more. This looks like we are in for a treat tonight but the ECW One Night Stands were held in such high regard so the question is simple: Could WWE’s One Night Stand deliver?

Opening Promo

A great promo package showing that there is no rules, anything goes on this awesome night. Mr. Mcmahon is all alone against Bobby Lashley, could this be possible? Edge has nowhere to run inside of the steel cage, highlights of all sorts of extreme action lead us to this one night stand.

(Stretcher Match) Randy Orton vs Rob Van Dam

The Legend Killer has found his edge once more, Orton was feeling very flat over the past number of months despite being a main-stay and centrepiece on the Raw roster. With his rope-hung DDT and his Punt kick that took out Shawn Michaels, things are looking fantastic for The Legend Killer who has tapped into a side of himself that was not seen since his battles with The Undertaker. RVD has been brutally beaten by Orton, not being able to continue in their match on Raw. Is RVD in any condition to compete? This match can only be won by placing your opponent on a stretcher and pushing them over the finish line at the top of the entrance way.

Stare-down, RVD talks trash and asks Orton who does he think he is before a massive kick to the face. Forearms from RVD, spinning heel kick in the corner. Ten punches in the corner from RVD, monkey flip from Van Dam. Slingshot leg drop from RVD, another spinning heel kick in the corner, this match has been all RVD. Roundhouse kick and corkscrew leg drop from RVD, mounted punches from Van Dam. Massive right from Orton, RVD looks to not know where he is, RVD might be showing the signs of the concussion. RVD blocks the RKO with a kick to the head, RVD goes high but misses the top rope. RVD is concussed, this match should be stopped.

Uppercut by Orton, make it two. Standing dropkick by Orton, Garvin-style stomps by Orton. Massive knee drop from Orton, Orton pummels the head of RVD. Elevated neckbreaker from Orton, RVD is rolled onto the stretcher. RVD rolls off and begins waffling Orton, Orton meets the ringpost. RVD puts Orton on the stretcher, RVD climbs to the apron. Corkscrew leg drop from the apron onto Orton, slingshot leg drop by RVD. RVD makes his clothesline, Rolling Thunder is stopped for a powerslam. RVD blocks an apron suplex and dropkicks Orton to the floor, Orton is on the stretcher and RVD attempts a Rolling Thunder onto the stretcher but Orton dodges. RVD lies broken on the floor, Orton pushes RVD to the line but RVD battles back and kicks Orton in the head to steal the win. Post-match, Orton decimates RVD.

Well, I did not think RVD was winning the match. That was a shock but the aftermath was what I was looking forward to because Orton is on fire at the minute in terms of building heat. Orton destroys RVD, arguably one of the most beloved babyfaces to ever grace the WWE, Orton destroys RVD in a sickening fashion, an assault that makes you feel uncomfortable, a feeling that you do not get often in wrestling. Orton is tremendous in his destruction of the ECW Original.

(Six-Man Tables Match) CM Punk/The Sandman/Tommy Dreamer vs Elijah Burke/Marcus Cor Von/Matt Striker

A continuation of Punk vs The New Breed people that Mr Punk screwed over, Burke may have lost Kevin Thorn but Cor Von and Striker are still here, this should be a fun match with tables you can hardly go wrong. Dreamer and Cor Von begin, shoulder block by Cor Von. Side headlock by Dreamer, stand-off. Striker distracts Dreamer, double underhook suplex from Cor Von. Tag to Burke, snapmare and knee drop by Burke. Burke misses a corner splash, Dreamer nails a bulldog. Tag to Sandman, flapjack by Sandman. Knee by Burke, tag to Striker. Hiptoss from Sandman, tag to Punk.

Muay Thai knees, high knee and bulldog on Striker. Tag to Dreamer, sidewalk slam and elbow drop combination. Punk and Dreamer do a tribute to The Dudley Boyz, Cor Von attacks Dreamer on the floor. Suicide Dive from Punk, Burke eats a springboard clothesline from Punk. Striker is caught between Sandman and his cane, Striker eats a massive right from Dreamer. Burke and Cor Von save Striker from going through a table, the match continues. Burke and Cor Von isolate Punk in the ring. Slam by Cor Von, slingshot elbow by Burke. Striker has a table, Punk is beaten down. Sandman pulls out Striker, Dreamer saves Punk. Striker shoves Sandman to the floor, Dreamer nails sky high on Striker.

Burke clotheslines Dreamer, Punk kicks Burke before Cor Von powerbombs Punk to the mat. Table is setup, Cor Von lays Punk on the table. Sandman canes Cor Von, Striker drops Sandman onto the steps. Dreamer piledrivers Burke, Burke is placed on the table. Punk superplexes Striker through the table onto Burke and The ECW Originals win this match.

This was fun, tables are fun. The ECW Originals were allowed use their weapons, the action was fast-paced in parts all the while, it centred around the future of the brand, that being Burke and Punk. Punk gets the final say in the feud, fun stuff and this would be some entertaining stuff to watch on the much criticized brand.

Winners: ECW Originals over New Breed via Superplex!

(WWE World Tag Team Championship Match) The Hardy Boyz © vs The World’s Greatest Tag Team (Ladder Match)

The Hardy Boyz continue to dominate the tag team division as they face a new challenge in what would be considered their signature match. Much like Cade & Murdoch, it appears Benjamin & Haas have come from nowhere to become challengers. The match begins with brawling, Matt bulldogs Benjamin. Double suplex on Haas, Omega combination from The Hardys. Haas double clotheslines the champions, everyone grabs ladders. Stand-off before The Hardys dropkick the ladders into Haas & Benjamin’s faces. Haas meets a corner ladder, Haas is sandwiched between ladders before Benjamin is smacked into Haas. Poetry in Motion on both challengers, Benjamin is buried under ladders.

Jeff almost grabs the championship, Haas yanks off Jeff. Haas climbs for gold, Matt has Haas for an electric chair drop. The Hardys climb, Benjamin grabs a ladder and knocks both Hardys off the ladder. Short-arm clothesline on Jeff, Matt is smacked onto a ladder. Haas & Benjamin maintain control before Haas climbs for gold, Benjamin joins Haas. Matt backdrops Benjamin off the ladder, Haas brawls with Jeff. Haas drives the ladder into both Hardys’ ribs, Benjamin and Haas create a see-saw of ladders. The Hardys stop the see-saw, hiptossing Benjamin onto the ladders. Haas is thrown from the top rope onto the see-saw, The Hardys roll to the floor and grab the large ladders.

Jeff places a ladder across the ring apron and the barricade, Haas is front suplexed on the ladder. Benjamin suplexes Matt into the ring, Benjamin attempts a running splash but Matt backdrops Benjamin over the top rope and onto the bridged ladder. Benjamin is placed on the ladder, Jeff wants to dive onto Benjamin. Haas saves Jeff with a super German suplex, Matt sees an opportunity to climb. Haas & Benjamin tip Matt over, Matt smacks his face off the ropes. Benjamin drops Jeff with a t-bone suplex, Haas has Matt on the floor in position for their signature tag team move. Benjamin climbs a ladder in the ring and drops all his weight on Matt on the outside, impressive looking visual here and a nice twist on their usual offense.

Haas climbs for gold, Jeff joins Haas on the ladder. Superplex from Jeff, Jeff recovers to climb the ladder, Benjamin kicks the ladder over leaving Jeff to the floor. Benjamin stabs Jeff with the ladder, Benjamin climbs for the win. Matt says no way, Benjamin is tied up in the ropes. Neckbreaker by Matt, two ladders stand in the middle of the ring. All four men begin brawling on the ladders, The Hardys tip over The World’s Greatest Tag Team, Benjamin spills out to the floor. Swanton Bomb on Haas and Matt brings home the gold.

The Hardys and ladder matches are the perfect mix, I enjoyed this match a lot with some really nice spots mixed in with the usual chaos that is brought by putting Jeff Hardy in situations where he can do some crazy shit. Hats off to Benjamin too, the guy would kill himself to get noticed and Benjamin’s athleticism is on full display throughout the night which makes it all the more sad than Benjamin was like a forgotten man by this point. Great match though, underrated because I have never heard anyone talk about this ladder match.

Winners: The Hardy Boyz over Haas & Benjamin via Retrieval Of The Championships!

(Lumberjack Match) Kane vs Mark Henry

What a waste of Chris Benoit, the lumberjacks include Val Venis, Santino Marella, Balls Mahoney, Stevie Richards, The Miz, Kevin Thorn, Chris Masters, Johnny Nitro, Chavo Guerrero Kenny Dykstra, and Carlito. Perhaps this is a good piece of storyline continuity as Henry did take out The Undertaker which led to Edge winning the world heavyweight championship, Kane could be here to defend his brother’s honour. Henry sends Kane to the floor, Kane scares away the lumberjacks. Kane boots Henry to the floor, lumberjacks are shaken off by Henry. Kane uppercuts Henry, Henry rolls to the floor. Both men brawl on the floor, Henry sends Kane into the ring apron. Kane is slammed into the ringpost, Henry clubs Kane in the lower back.

Kane fires back before running into a powerslam, two for Henry. Bearhug from Henry, Kane backs himself into the corner. Henry releases the hold, Kane tries a chokeslam but the back of Kane is too weak for such a move. Bearhug again for Henry, Kane chokes Henry to escape. Kane lures Henry in, Henry is on the floor. Kane dives onto Henry and the lumberjacks, corner clotheslines from Kane. Diving clothesline from Kane, Kane calls for the chokeslam. Kane’s back holds, Chokeslam on Henry. Dykstra and Chavo jump Kane, Kane clears the ring but Henry has a bearhug. Kane does not survive and Henry claims victory.

It was alright, lumberjack matches have never been spectacular. The only one of note that I can remember was Dean Ambrose vs Seth Rollins, that is the only one that blew me away. The rest are usually boring affairs with the same group of spots, it was weird aswell with Dykstra and Chavo jumping Kane without the babyfaces and heels all brawling on the floor, they stood around like cheerleaders, they could not even get that right. So, it was what it was, nothing special and just there on the card.

Winner: Mark Henry over Kane via Bearhug!

(ECW World Heavyweight Championship Match) Vince Mcmahon © vs Bobby Lashley (Street Fight)

Vince has Shane and Umaga in his corner, flashbacks of the last two pay per views enter my mind. Lashley has defeated the trio but Lashley failed to pin Vince which allowed Vince to change the rules and screw over Lashley out of regaining the championship. Lashley dives over the top rope onto Umaga, Lashley botches the landing and hurts himself. Great start, Shane jumps Lashley. Rights and lefts from Shane, Vince watches from safety. Lashley presses Shane onto Umaga, Vince is all alone.

Lashley pummels Vince, Lashley takes care of Shane. Right hands to Umaga, Umaga misses a splash. Lashley boots Shane, Lashley has a chair. Vince is picked up, Umaga Samoan Spikes Lashley. Shane DDTs Lashley on a chair, clothesline by Vince. Make it two, headbutt from Umaga. Low blow from Vince, Lashley is dumped to the floor. Vince chokes Lashley with the hammer for the ringbell, Shane and Umaga put the boots to Lashley. Vince kicks Lashley while talking trash, more choking and strangling from Vince. Samoan drop from Umaga, Vince covers for two. Spear by Vince for two, Umaga splashes Vince by mistake.

Lashley throws Umaga to the floor, Lashley belly to belly suplexes Shane to the floor. Lashley has a chair, Vince is smacked in the head hard with the chair. Lashley wears out Vince with the chair, Running Powerslam with Umaga saving Vince. Lashley has another chair, superkick from Umaga. Umaga splashes Lashley from the apron, Umaga clears the announce table. Shane is on the top rope, Elbow Drop through the announce table. Vince covers and it’s a two! Umaga nails his running hip attack, Shane wants coast to coast. Lashley dodges, Shane kicks the trash can into Umaga’s face. Spear to Shane, Spear to Vince and Lashley is ECW Champion.

The tale of redemption comes to an end with Lashley winning back his championship, I thought the best version of this match was the one at Judgment Day, short and sweet. This was not like that match, this was more like Backlash which was less enjoyable. I had seen the same match too many times by this point, happy for Lashley as you cannot deny that Lashley feels like a bigger deal now after the feud but what would be next for Lashley? Once you work with The Mcmahons, only the WWE Championship would not be considered a step down but isn’t it a bit soon?

Winner: Bobby Lashley over The Mcmahons via Spear!

(Pudding Match) Candice Michelle vs Melina

AND I JUST SAID THIS DIVISION WAS TAKING STEPS FORWARD! DAMN YOU AND DAMN EVERYTHING THAT I SAID PREVIOUSLY! Ok, got that out of my system, I am ready for whatever the fuck this is, a big pool of pudding just like the days of Stacy, Torrie, The Kat. Melina is dumped in, they roll around in the pool. Shoving, pushing etc. They roll out of the pool, Melina applies a choke. Candice escapes, DDT in the pudding? Forearms from Melina, Candice tries drowning Melina who taps. SHITE!

Winner: Candice over Melina via Choke!

(WWE World Heavyweight Championship Match) Edge © vs Batista (Steel Cage Match)

Ah yes, the death nail in the coffin for Mr. Chickenshit heel Edge. Edge has stolen the championship from Undertaker, Edge has squeaked past Batista at Judgment Day. This is a cage match, Edge cannot run or hide. Batista is coming to the ring with a purpose, Edge looks petrified as he should knowing that this could be the end of his championship reign. Batista is 100% too, no taped up limbs on The Animal. Edge tries running out the door, Batista stops the champion in his tracks. Edge tries climbing over the top, Batista drags down Edge. Batista punishes Edge with foot chokes and a camel clutch, Edge is hanging on by a thread.

Shoulder block for two, clothesline for two. Suplex for two, Edge is being battered in this match. Batista looks to escape, Edge stops Batista. Dropkick to the knee, Batista lands between the ropes and cage, massive Spear from Edge. Edge slams Batista into the cage, Batista crumbles to the ground. Baseball slide to the ribs from Edge, Batista smacks off the cage. Edge tries escaping but Batista has some fight left in him, Edge exposes a top turnbuckle. Batista blocks and kicks Edge, Edge counters a powerslam for an Edge O Matic. Batista and Edge are on the top rope, Edge tries escaping only to eat a superplex from The Animal. Two for Batista, Batista attempts escaping. Edge stops Batista, Batista rams Edge’s head into the cage. Edge falls to the mat, Batista looks for a diving shoulder block but Edge has it scouted for a dropkick.

Both men bang heads of a spear collision, Batista clotheslines Edge hard. Sidewalk slam for two, Edge misses a dropkick. Batista catapults Edge into the cage, schoolboy for two. Corner clothesline and Batista lawn darts Edge into the steel cage. Edge sends Batista into the exposed turnbuckle, Spear from Edge for two. Batista recovers, Edge scales the cage to escape The Batista Bomb. Edge just has to drop down, Batista has Edge by his hair. The two struggle for what seems like an age, low blows from Edge. Batista falls to the floor, the two race out of the cage with Batista crawling for the door and Edge climbs over the top. The two race but Edge drops to the floor before Batista could escape!

It was solid but not as fun as I thought it could have been at the end of the night, I looked forward to Batista destroying Edge, I did not exactly get that when all was finished. I think the crotching yourself spot is always comical, I think the two low blows without Batista landing on his balls would have been more acceptable and the crawling out of the cage finish is a bit iffy to me for the simple fact that the wrestlers are always told before the match that both feet must touch the floor yet they always crawl out on their hands. Just nit-picking but I never like my babyfaces looking like complete imbeciles.

Winner: Edge over Batista via Escaping The Cage!

(WWE Championship Match) John Cena © vs The Great Khali W/ Ranjin Singh (Falls Count Anywhere Match)

Rematch time, Cena vs Khali with pin-falls count anywhere. Khali has never been pinned, let’s see how this match goes for The Master of Thuganomics. Cena chops at Khali with kicks, Khali catches the leg and punishes Cena. Elbows in the corner, headbutt by Khali. Big boot by Khali, scoop slam from Khali. Khali misses a leg drop, Cena goes to the top rope but Khali brain chops Cena and pushes the champion to the floor. Two for Khali, Cena attempts a low dropkick using the steps. Khali dodges and slams Cena’s head into the announce table, Cena blocks the brain chop but Khali throws Cena into the crowd. Cena and Khali brawl in the crowd, Cena tries an FU.

Khali stops Cena with a massive chop, more clubbing blows from Khali. Khali boots Cena, they make their way around the arena. Khali misses a clothesline, Cena waffles Khali with a camera boom mic, Cena covers for two. Khali blocks another FU, Khali press slams Cena onto a crane. The two are on the crane, Cena blocks a throat toss. Cena FUs Khali to the floor, Cena covers and Cena retains the championship.

Well, it was as basic as you could get with Khali in there, bordering on laughable with the big man’s attacks but the crowd were into this match. Cena managed to turn this into an entertaining affair with a fun finish despite the limitations within Khali, it did not go very long like their other battles and nothing here blew me away but it was a fun end to the show with a finish that few were expecting.

Winner: John Cena over Great Khali via Super FU!

That was WWE’s One Night Stand 2007, a hit and miss pay per view from the crazy mind of Mr. Mcmahon. While the show was full to the brim with gimmick matches, some of these matches did not deliver or were rather dull. The pay per view was chugging along solidly with the tables match and the ladder match was a lot of fun too before dipping with the ECW Championship match that was a repeat of Backlash, the pudding match which was filler at its worst, the World Heavyweight Championship match that was not enough of either Edge getting his ass kicked or Batista being screwed out of his championship while the main event was fun for the finish and the crowd’s participation/reaction to the match but it was nothing to write home about. To conclude, there were things I enjoyed about this pay per view but it did leave much to be desired, thanks for reading and remember: There’s always another night!

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