Hello and welcome to another edition of Seanomaniac Wrestling Reviews, the only wrestling review series on the internet that brings more pain than Mark Henry in 2011! It’s time for WCW Clash of The Champions XXVI! We have a massive tag team elimination match with Ric Flair teaming with Sting against Vader and Rick Rude, Flyin’ Brian Pillman vs Colonel Rob Parker in a loser must wear a chicken-suit match, Nasty Boys will take on Cactus Jack & Maxx Payne and we even have Television championship match as Regal defends against The Natural Dustin Rhodes. Solid card but will the action deliver? Let’s find out!
Pretty Wonderful W/ The Assassin vs Marcus Bagwell & 2 Cold Scorpio W/ Teddy Long
Bobby Heenan debuts in WCW before this match, absolutely massive stuff right there because WCW has had Jesse Ventura for two years almost now, Mean Gene Okerlund has been with the company since mid-1993 and now, Bobby Heenan is here in WCW. Taking everything that made the WWF so great was certainly quite the strategy by Easy E and co.
Anyways, it is rematch time from Starrcade. The Assassin is here as is Teddy Long, how is Teddy Long manager of the year? What has this tag team been doing off PPV? Paula chants all throughout the arena, it’s still over brother. Scorpio and Orndorff to start the match, they lock-up with a side headlock from Orndorff. The two trade holds and locks, Scorpio is down to a knee but rolls through and changes the tide with his own wristlock. Orndorff works the ribs and tees off with forearms on Scorpio, Orndorff argues with Bagwell and the referee before continuing the punishment. Scorpio reverses an Irish whip but runs into a boot, Scorpio slips out of a suplex and we have a few stiff forearms but Orndorff manages to land a drop toehold and Roma comes with the leg drop.
We return from commercial with Roma and Bagwell in the ring, stun-gun from Roma. Massive elbow to the throat from Orndorff illegally, Bagwell and Roma continue showcasing their talent. Sunset flip by Bagwell for two before Roma lands a clothesline, Roma jaw-jacks with Scorpio. Rome misses an elbow drop, Scorpio comes in and works the arm with stiff kicks. Roma is placed on the top rope, Orndorff stops the superplex and Scorpio is nailed with a diving axe handle. Roma climbs high again, another axe handle to the back of the head. In comes Orndorff with a camel clutch, front chancery from Orndorff. Scorpio inches towards his corner, Roma drags Scorpio back to his team’s corner.
Forearm shots from Orndorff, Assassin lands a cheap-shot from ringside. Roma is legal now, foot choke from Roma. Roma lands a big elbow drop, Orndorff is in the ring and continues to land elbows to slow down Scorpio. Double back drop on Scorpio, elbow drops again by Orndorff. Roma lands a middle rope elbow drop for two, Orndorff tags in and tries a top rope attack but Scorpio blocks with a boot. Scorpio tags in Bagwell, Roma begs for mercy. Hip-toss, elbows all around. Scoop slams, Orndorff takes a knee in the back to the floor. Bagwell is on the top rope, missile dropkick on Roma for two as Orndorff makes the save. Scorpio is furious that the referee is missing the pin-fall, Orndorff has succeeded in frustrating the babyfaces, we have a breakdown as Scorpio and Orndorff are in the ring. Orndorff dodges a splash by Scorpio, Scorpio spills to the floor.
Roma has Bagwell, Orndorff is with The Assassin. The Assassin has put something in the knee of Orndorff, Roma winds up for the big spot but Bagwell manages to block Roma and Roma’s head is rammed into the knee of Orndorff. Bagwell covers Roma for the win, the heels try to get their heat back but Scorpio cleans house.
Crowd is quite hot for this match which is the opposite of me considering how many times I had to watch these two teams face another but Bobby Heenan is excellent on commentary for sure. Not sure what could be next for Pretty Wonderful but it seems like a good spot for both men while Scorpio’s progress has been halted by working with Bagwell but they are challenging for the tag team championships again so maybe they are going to be pushed to the moon, who knows?
Winners: Bagwell & Scorpio over Pretty Wonderful via Foreign Object!
Ron Simmons vs Ice Train
Ice Train slaps the shit out of Simmons, lands a powerslam and a shoulder tackle. Simmons dodges a tackle and Ice Train hits the ring-post hard, Simmons is the veteran here and Ice Train is his rookie. Snap-mare from Simmons, Simmons had shown heelish tendencies for quite some time now, frustrated with his terrible partners costing him his matches. Headbutt from Simmons and massive rights and lefts. Another headbutt from Simmons, snap-mare and trash-talk from Simmons. Ice Train is up, stiff clothesline from Simmons. Hammer-lock throw into the buckle, Ice Train does a sunset flip out of the corner but Simmons powers out at two. Scoop slam and Simmons is on the top rope, diving shoulder block misses as Ice Train swats him down. Powerslam by Ice Train, throw to the corner. Ice Train misses a corner splash and Simmons rolls-up Ice Train with a handful of tights.
Thankfully brief, hard-hitting as it should be though. I appreciate how they wrecked one another when they went for their big moves but I do not have high hopes for Ice Train in WCW nor do I see Ron Simmons rising to the heights of the world championship again.
Winner: Ron Simmons over Ice Train via Roll-Up!
(WCW Television Championship Match) Lord Steven Regal © vs Dustin Rhodes
Rhodes looks to bounce back from dropping his United States Championship to Stunning Steve Austin by capturing another championship in WCW, Rhodes out-wrestles Regal in the beginning before they lock-up with Regal pushing Rhodes to the corner. Slap by Regal, Rhodes fires up with big right hands and a dropkick. Regal powders, Rhodes begin to work the arm tossing Regal across the ring by the arm. Regal grimaces and shows the pain of this attack, more stalling. Regal escapes the wristlock and uses his superior mat skills to work the arm of the challenger, Rhodes has a side headlock. Regal falls for Rhodes’ trickery and is slammed hard, side headlock takedown from Rhodes. Regal uses his skills on the mat to try to counter the hold, Rhodes is tenacious and holds onto the head. Regal forces some space and uses the leg of Rhodes to escape but a drop toehold from Rhodes allows the challenger to regain control.
Regal backs Rhodes to the corner, European uppercuts from the champion turn the tide. Rhodes misses a wild swing, Regal continues clubbing and landing uppercuts, snap-mare into a knee-drop. Raised keylock from Regal, Rhodes eventually shakes off Regal before Regal trips Rhodes and goes back to the face, I feel like we are going to a draw which is almost a staple of Regal’s run as champion. Regal uses a headbutt to maintain control and chokes Rhodes with his own arms, Rhodes pulls off Regal and lands a massive flying lariat for two. Regal rolls out to the floor to waste more time, this is quite good stuff. Shoulder thrust from the apron and Regal tries a slingshot sunset flip but Rhodes blocks and pummels Regal with right hands.
Right hand after right hand, flying lariat from Rhodes for two. Regal rolls to the floor again, Rhodes follows this time. Suplex into the ring is blocked, Rhodes lands a big dropkick for two. Regal rolls out to the floor again, Regal is wasting as much time as humanly possible. Uppercuts by Regal, Regal tries a charging attack. Rhodes back-drops Regal into the ring, slingshot splash from Rhodes. Regal rolls to the floor again, Rhodes punches Regal and Sir William. Noggin-knocker but the time is ticking, Rhodes is on the top rope. Diving elbow drop from Rhodes, Running Bulldog lands but we are out of time.
That was very average but the last three minutes were quite entertaining with Regal desperately trying to waste as much time as possible, I thought it was quite fun but yeah I have become accustomed to watching WCW wrasslin’ and I could see the draw coming from a mile away so this was a rough one to watch for me when I knew what they were going to do with me, I think Rhodes deserves better but he’s become almost ice-cold. How can they rebuild him? No idea but they need to do something quick!
The Nasty Boys W/ Missy Hyatt vs Maxx Payne & Cactus Jack
Following Cactus’ big angle with Vader, Cactus has been shifted to the tag team division just like that with Maxx Payne who has been a disappointment since entering WCW.
The match starts with brawling, elbows and right hands all around. Cactus Jack clothesline and elbow drop to the floor, Cactus seems to be going all out. Payne has Knobbs in the ring, suplex. Cactus slams Sags on the floor, another elbow drop? Cactus nails it! Cactus cracks Knobbs with an elbow to the face, Sags meets the ring-post thanks to Payne. Payne comes in, Knobbs thumbs the eye and tags in Sags. Sags tries a dive from the top rope, Payne blocks but Sags manages to rake the eyes. In comes Knobbs with right hands, Payne meets the buckle but shakes it off. Headbutts and right hands, whip to the corner. Knobbs manages to block Payne with a boot, Paynalizer from Payne! Payne looks to run the ropes but Sags trips up Payne. Knobbs lands leg-drops and knee-drops, two for Knobbs. Sags grabs a chair and cracks Payne in the back of the head, that looked like it sucked.
Knobbs and Sags continue to punish Payne, Payne manages to kick Knobbs square in the face. Cactus is punched off the apron, Nasty Boys try a double team but Payne manages to clothesline both men down with a lot of fire. Tag to Cactus, right hands all around. Cactus lands clotheslines everywhere, Payne comes in so we have a pier-six brawl. Noggin-knocker for the Nasty Boys, double Cactus Jack clothesline to the floor. Double Arm DDT on Knobbs, Sags lands an elbow drop to the back of the head, Knobbs covers but Payne drops an elbow drop on Knobbs so Cactus wins after pinning Knobbs.
Well it was a match anyways, nothing special but it was a tag team match that was mercifully brief. Not really excited about this tag team match but it’s WCW and the tag division has been suffering for a long time without The Steiners, the breakup of The Blondes and Steamboat losing Shane Douglas.
Winners: Team Cactus over The Nasty Boys via Elbow Drop to The Head!
(Chicken Suit Match) Colonel Robert Parker vs Flyin’ Brian Pillman
Parker is terrified of Pillman, Pillman lands a massive scoop slam for two. Dropkick from Pillman, Austin is in a suit at ringside trying to cheer on Parker, Pillman drills Austin with right hands and chops. Parker watches on before slamming Pillman onto the ring apron, Parker lands chops and clubbing blows in the corner. Pillman sends Parker to the buckle, gut shot and atomic drop from Pillman. Two for Pillman, Parker is on the ramp and Pillman back-drops Austin. The Boss is here, Austin is kicked off the ramp. Parker is thrown back into the ring, Parker asks for a handshake before running to the floor. The Boss stops Parker from running but Austin attacks Pillman. Stun-gun from Austin, Parker chokes Pillman on the middle rope. Austin lands a right hand behind the referee’s back, Parker is on the middle rope.
Right hand to the ribs, chops from Pillman. Flying clothesline by Pillman, dropkick by Pillman. Parker has his head rammed off the buckle, Pillman was on the top rope but Austin shoves Pillman off the top rope. The Boss chases Austin away, Parker is distraught as Pillman rolls-ups Parker for the win.
Even when doing comedy, WCW falls short. Decent of them to try and salvage The Boss in WCW but man that debut was rough at Starrcade, Pillman deserves much better and Austin was feuding with Flair why are we still dragging this one out?
Winner: Flyin’ Brian Pillman over Colonel Robert Parker via Roll-Up!
Vader & Ravishing Rick Rude W/ Harley Race vs Sting & Ric Flair
Flair has beef with both Rude and Vader while Sting had been fighting the duo on and off for the entirety of 1993, Sting and Rude to start this one off. Rude backs Sting to the corner, clean break shockingly from The Ravishing One. Sting shoves back Rude and poses, Rude is pissed off. Top wristlock from Rude, Sting reverses so Rude uses massive clubbing blows but Sting holds onto the arm and we are entering Rude’s signature shine. Rude backs Sting to the corner, knees and clubbing blows by Rude. Tag to Vader and Vader clubs down Sting, military press onto the ropes. Vader lands massive blows before slamming Sting hard to the mat, Vader is on the middle rope and tries a sunset flip but Sting crushes the ribs of Vader. Rude comes in to save Vader, Vader takes off the mask and starts battering Sting around the ring.
Sting avoids a right hand and German suplexes Vader, tag to Flair. Flair lands rights and chops, whip to the buckle. Vader is chopped down, thumbs to the eyes. Rights and lefts with Vader absorbing the blows, tag to Sting. Commercial break though, we come back to Rude bearhugging Sting. Sting breaks free and flapjacks Rude, Flair is tagged into the match. Diving axe handle and atomic drop before Flair chops away at Rude, Rude is whipped to the buckle and forgets to put his boot up but Flair sells anyways, Vader corner splashes Flair. Slam to the mat, Vader is climbing high. Vader Bomb crushes Flair, superplex from Vader. Vader wants a top rope superplex, Flair is drilled with the superplex.
Vader wants a splash from the top rope, Sting drags away Flair. The match breaks down, Rude plants Sting with a DDT. What the hell is going on here? Vader takes a chair with Bockwinkel having a great issue with this. Nick Bockwinkel is blocking Vader, Harley Race is reasoning with the monster. Vader talks trash to the crowd, Vader and Flair have been eliminated from this match as Flair cannot compete and Vader was disqualified for being a prick. Rude and Sting remain, Rude is on the ramp with Sting throwing him back into the ring. Diving clothesline from Sting, Rude blocks an inverted atomic drop and climbs to the top rope. Rude waits for Sting, diving axe handle from Ravishing Rick Rude. Clothesline by Rude, fist drop to the face for two.
Reverse chin-lock from Rude, Sting begins to power up but Rude drops his weight down on the back of Sting. Sting electric chair-drops Rude but the splash is blocked with knees, Rude wants his Rude Awakening but Sting uses the ropes to block the hold. Rude Awakening from Sting, Rude uses the ropes to kick out at two! Irish whip by Rude, inverted atomic drop but the corner splash misses for Rude. Rude wants a tombstone, Sting kicks out and drops Rude with a piledriver. Sting is high in the air, diving top rope splash and Sting picks up the win!
Sting is impressive as always, Sting is widely popular and while his battle with Vader was brief in this tag match, I wanted to see these two brawl once again. Flair being stretchered out by Vader again is definitely an interesting choice, there has to be a rematch coming right? Regardless, this was a fun tag team match that blew away the rest of the card even though two of the four men involved didn’t work the match for that long.
Winner: Sting over Rick Rude via Top Rope Splash!
That was WCW’s Clash of The Champions XXVI, a standard Clash for WCW with not much going on until the main event, I am not exactly thrilled with the product going into the first PPV of 1994 but knowing that Hogan is on the horizon certainly makes thing so much more interesting because of how it will affect booking plans, who will come in with Hogan and who will be leaving the company in the months to come. Thanks for reading and remember: there’s always another night!